Another Tight Bank
Back in the days that the UK had a financial services industry, I found myself working for a consultancy who despatched me to a client in the wilds of Newcastle that sounds like Northern Crock.

It was the strangest place that I've ever had the misfortune to work, mainly due to their penny pinching nature: -
- we were not allowed to make phone calls on land lines, as any call in excess of 50p had to be investigated by the departmental manager. As southerners, any call was likely to breach this limit, so it was forbidden.
- we were not allowed to use mobiles, as client staff weren't allowed them in the office (wonderful, no phones at all then during the day)
- we had an ancient LaserJet 4, no suffix, that celebrated its 10th anniversary of manufacture with us. This thing only printed 1 page per minute. We were there to produce 100s of pages of documentation that had to be printed.
- paper was carefully rationed, as the stationery budgets for each area were closely monitored. God help us if we took a ream from the wrong cupboard.
- the drinks machine dispensed vile ersatz coffee for the princely sum of 15 pence, apart from half an hour in the morning and afternoon when it was FREE. This led to the entire floor of over 100 people queuing up for its dubious delights.
- we were forbidden the use of the internet, on the grounds of cost. This is fine, unless you have a team of a dozen consultants who need to confirm their flights/trains back to London, who are also denied the use of phones.

This was all penny pinching at its finest, as they would have been paying my employers in excess of 10 grand a week for our services. I truely hated that client.
(Scooby Don't, Tue 28 Oct 2008, 13:59, 3 replies)

So
It was you and your free coffees that cost me my shares, bastard!
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Tue 28 Oct 2008, 14:14, closed)

...
I like the use of the word "ersatz", and was going to click for that alone. But then I noticed a wayward apostrophe, so I decided not to.

I'm a tightwad with clicks.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Tue 28 Oct 2008, 14:17, closed)

Fair Enough
I claim a bottle of wine as an excuse, and removed the apostrophe (I think, it's late in my time zone)
(Scooby Don't, Tue 28 Oct 2008, 14:20, closed)