sleepwalking
once, when i was about 9, i was staying at my friends country cottage/mansion. fell asleep in a nice cosy bed one night, woke up to discover i had one foot mysteriously immersed in some warmish water. for the life of me couldn't work out what was going on, so presumed had a) wet myself somehow and b) gone blind. the fact it was night hadn't occured to my addled 9 year old mind. this caused much panic and set me off whimpering and i remember distinctly at one point shouting quite loudly about being.. blind. eventually woke up enough to realise i was upright, and at that moment clarity struck me as i realised that my foot was indeed firmly wedged down the toilet. which was on a different floor to the bedroom i was staying in. and had no windows, so it was quite likely that actually i wasn't all that blind.

promptly removed foot from toilet and wandered back upstairs, and decided to inform parents of my horrific sleepwalking ordeal. i think the terror was finally compounded when i discovered naked parents obviously very recently post-coital.

not sure that night could have got much worse.
(imitation, Sat 3 Sep 2005, 19:40, Reply)