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This is a question Training courses, seminars and conferences

Inspirational or a waste of precious slacking-off time? I once went on a buzzword bingo-laden training course which ended up with my being held at gunpoint in public. Could have gone better, to be honest. Tell us your tales from either side of the lectern

(, Thu 15 Mar 2012, 15:01)
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The job seekers training fortnight
Well I was unemployed and was forced into this 'we'll ruin your life for two weeks in a sterile environment course' with 15 other people.- Highlights of the event include being told how to wash and cook, how to canoe down a subzero temperature Welsh creek* and how to type a letter and send it to four completely random businesses in the yellow pages (amongst other things).
Please bare in mind this was in sunny Runcorn upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/c2/Runcorn_Bridges.jpg
(for those not in the know, Runcorn was a shelved social experiment that split the housing situation in post-industrial Liverpool)and in a very cold autumn.

Anyhoo, to spur us on at the very end of the fortnight - the demotivational speaker encouraged us to 'think for ourselves' by bringing forth a challenging dialogue between the jobless and the government funded department. The staff were brought into the room (all three of them) and we were then requested to talk about anything 'edgy' - and he mentioned previous talks included 9/11 , domestic violence and such.

The final vote ended up on the subject of cannabis and it's legality. To cut a long and dismal story short, the dialogue went like this:

Demotivator (DM) - 'Well cannabis is a drug, this means it's illegal and bad. If you made it legal then everyone would be turning up to work stoned, this is against company policy and bad, I'm assuming this is why many of you are going to defend this - any questions'

Random guy ' Yeah but wouldn't it cut crime?'

DM: Well yes and no. It would be against company policy, you can't turn up for work stoned'

A different guy: ' Bob Marley was stoned'

DM: 'Yes but Bob Marley was a musician it's different'

Same guy: 'Yes but I'm a musician'

DM: 'But it's against company policy'

Same guy: 'I'm unemployed'

(Then I piped up) Me: 'It's against company policy to be drunk whilst at work, are you drunk?'

DM: 'No'

Me: 'So you can acknowledge the fact that there's a certain notion of self control involved between private life and work life?'

Dm: 'Well..Yes'

Me: 'Well... Why can't the same apply for cannabis? If it's fine for creative people, then why not let everyone use it'

Dm: 'Because it's against company policy'


By this point the conversation died in jeering and laughter and voices, nobody took the guy seriously anymore, the staff were anxious about the turn of events and the DM guy told us we could all go home and absolutely nothing about that course made any real sense.

What waste of frigging time. But still I accidently got paid for my dinners twice, so it wasn't all doom and gloom.

* Yeah canoeing in Wales in a very cold autumn, They originally wanted to take us climbing, but everything was frozen, and I assume the whole point of this exercise was to kill off a few of the unemployed.

Edit: I'm drunk, this probably doesn't make much sense.
(, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 2:03, 4 replies)
'Needless to say, I had the last laugh'.

(, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 8:23, closed)
Actually, I completely agree with you.
It doesn't make sense.
(, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 8:57, closed)
I'm a bit stoned
And I understood it all

Especially the bits about Bob Marley
(, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 9:32, closed)
This doesn't make much sense does it.
Oh well.
(, Fri 16 Mar 2012, 13:52, closed)

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