Three wheels on my wagon
I have a confession to make: I used to be a Reliant Robin driver. Yes, I know, not exactly the height of coolness, but they have two important features: 1) you can drive them on a motorcycle license, and 2) you can buy one for less than the cost of a full tank for most other cars. I never minded the jokes and insults, in fact I collected them.

And they are nippier than they look, because they're light - about 450kg all up. So while their top speed is laughable -- about 85, though anything over 70 is an "interesting" experience, about as relaxing as owing money to someone whose middle name is "the" -- they do have decent acceleration. It's possible to leave people standing at the lights, which is fun, and a guaranteed way to get a certain kind of driver really, really annoyed. Somehow, they think that it's an insult to their manhood to be burnt up by a plastic pig.

My favourite was a guy towing a caravan. He was doing a steady, reasonable speed, maybe 55 or 60 mph. No problem to overtake. But as soon as I moved back over to his lane in front of him, he sped up, indicated and passed me - simply to drop back in and slow down again, once he was back in front.

This happened three or four times; every time I passed him, he'd try to get back in front. Clearly he was insulted by the thought of my shit-brown (apart from the mismatched yellow door) little pig having the temerity to think it would ever be allowed to be in front of him. Naturally, our speed began to creep up each time. By the fourth time he re-passed me, we were approaching 70mph, and the caravan was rocking and fish-tailing, threatening to turn over - but still the idiot had to get back past.

In his foaming, wheel-biting rage he clearly hadn't seen the police car which was now in front of me, and which he also had to pass in order to complete the manoeuvre. It's safe to say they weren't impressed as a caravan went past bouncing around like a toddler on espresso.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:09, 15 replies)

Yeah, but still . . .
a fucking Reliant ROBIN?
(username failed moderation, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:26, closed)

One thing they're not great for is fucking
Very small, you see.

On the other hand, many women know the old "Big Car = Small Dick" compensation, so driving a tiny and defiantly non-flashy car does make a certain statement...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:27, closed)

It had genuinely never occurred to me to attempt coitus with a Reliant Robin - but any information is useful, I suppose.

*click*
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 16:56, closed)

Ah, but in the Reliant Supervan....
....it is eminently possible to have a shag. The lady needs to be fairly short, otherwise use of Rear Entry is compulsory.
(Colonel Blink is now officially a pretentious prick, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 21:22, closed)

Click for "toddler on espresso"
And also if I could for sympathy of owning a Plastic Pig.

Many years ago a my brothers friend had one, and after the usual breakdowns and rollovers, he decided to torch it can claim any insurance he could.

Apparently he drove it into a field, poured petrol on it and lit it. The blast knocked him back and he ran off.

I let him know I didn't really approve, and he replied that it was ok really, as when he went back the next day there was "nothing left" but a charred blob. No way to identify it as a car, let alone his one.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:43, closed)

They scare the hell out of me
Surely (Shirley?) they're easy to roll whilst taking a corner?
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 16:04, closed)

I never found that
I drove mine like a loon, and on the occasions when I did reach - or rather exceed - the limits, I found that it fish-tailed, rather than rolling. Still scary, though!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 16:17, closed)

I believe Mr Clarkson
and friends made substantial alterations to that car for comedy effect.

Unfortunately, they didn't do anything like as much as Reliant Ltd. did for comedy effect.
(username failed moderation, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 16:40, closed)

I had the exact same problem when I has a Smart
All the way up the A12 from the M25 to Chelmsford.
Every time I went passed a shitty Ford pick up he would overtake and then drop in front of me going really slowly.
This carried on until we got to a straight stretch of empty road when we ended up having a 'race'. I won, he sulked.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 16 Apr 2012, 21:13, closed)

Many moons ago...
...before Manston became an international airport, there was a bit of a semi-unofficial drag strip on the perimeter road. Used to go there on my Yamaha XS1.1 for a bit of a blast, and once there was a Reliant Supervan there that looked a bit odd. After a bit, we realised it had four wheels. Looked through the window, and the drivers seat is a good few feet further back than normal, to make room for the 6 cyl 4.2litre Jaguar lump that now powered it. Owner said he loved coming up behind Salestwats sitting in the fast lane at 80mph and flashing them over, then changing into top as he passed them............. Said the handling was frightening as fuck though.
(Colonel Blink is now officially a pretentious prick, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 21:27, closed)

It wasn't a Reliant Kitten, was it?
A chap I used to practice karate with had a hobby of putting large engines in small cars, a Kitten being one of them.

The only real giveaways were the bigger wheels and the twin fans for the radiator poking out of the front.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Tue 17 Apr 2012, 8:01, closed)

.
I once (ooh, must have been over 20 years ago) saw a puke green one blitzing off a Sierra Cosworth on the A58 near Wetherby. It was only as it passed us that we glimpsed the massive hotrod rear tyres and twin front wheels. As the Cosworth passed us (what seemed like) minutes later, we gave the driver a sympathetic wave.
(Chickenwire social lubricator extraordinaire, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 15:34, closed)

I had a Reliant Rialto
which is the rather more aerodynamic version of the Robin. More of a wedge at the front, giving more down force. One of the most fun cars I have ever had - it went like shit off a shovel and I still miss it. According to the owners' club (yes, really) they have no known top speed, as even the factory test driver was too scared to keep accelerating as long as the car would. In stock form they'll certainly do a hundred, though the maximum I ever saw on my speedometer was 96.

I had a similar experience with a caravan. A twat of a driver with a 4x4 (oops, redundant "twat of a") and a caravan (oops, doubly redundant "twat of a") just had to get past me on the the A road past Barnard Castle, and as he went past he lost it completely. The caravan was putting one wheel alternately on the left and right grass verges as I tried to work out which side he would crash to be ready to pass on the other; there was no time to brake to a stop behind the remains.

By some miracle he didn't actually crash, but he didn't seem to appreciate my cheerful wave as I nipped past a minute later. Mind you, I think his wife and two kids were having a frank discussion with him at the time.
(ubergeekian, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 23:23, closed)

As the OP I can't click you, but...
...I'd like to, merely for the idea that a Reliant owner considers the downforce of their vehicle in anything like a serious manner!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 17 Apr 2012, 12:35, closed)

Clicked for you.
Although one of my cars is a 4x4 (just for around the stables and towing the horse box) I have to admit that most are complete knob-ends. Especially the ones without even a towbar.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 7:58, closed)