Hi there
I'm the person / fool who asked the QOTW this week.

I've been out of work since August - although technically speaking, looking full time for work all year, for reasons too long to go into here.

Yes, it sucks. Yes the endless cycle of rejections, or more commonly not hearing a thing back, really fucks up one's confidence. It's easy to say / think "don't take it personally" but in reality one does.

But you're not a failure. What is happening in the world is not your fault, you are just caught up in it.

My advice:

a) go for walks. The weather's getting better, walking is free, it's good exercise, it won't damage your body and will release good chemicals into your system. Make a playlist of happy tunes for your walkman and walk long, hard and fast for an hour a day, two walks of 30 minutes is best. Sets you up for the day in the morning, sorts you out in the evening.

b) You might think you have precisely fuck all to talk about to people, but in reality when one talks to friends and family, the subject of work isn't one many of us want to hear about for long. You are still you. Having friends over only costs a cup of tea. See people and do it; and if they offer you food when you go there, it's not charity, it's friendship. Do not isolate yourself or think that lack of employment = lack of social skills.

c) Value yourself. Money might be tight, but you should be able to afford the 10 quid or so for hiring films with Lovefilm or similar. Ditto the occasional bottle of wine or whatever for home. Ditto a meal which isn't beans on toast.

d) Talk to others when you are down. Don't bottle it up. Talk to strangers if that's easier - gaz me if you want to, I'm happy to chat and listen and so on. Seriously, get in touch. We can all help ourselves through this.

e) Take heart. This isn't for ever.
( I_Was_Mordred, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 16:30, Reply)