Wardrobe Malfunction
Way back in the mists of time, when I were but a youngster, the years were longer and the cost of fuel was approximately a quarter of what it is now, the family took possession of my gran's old wardrobe.

This was a solid piece of work - none of your painted chipboard shite. No, this was a solid mahogany job, with three doors, a full length mirror on the middle door and a couple of hefty drawers in the bottom for good measure. Whilst it was awaiting transportation into mum's bedroom, it stood imposingly in the hallway, at the foot of the stairs. Until one day...

As I was heading off upstairs (I can't remember why), I heard a creak and as I looked behind me, saw the wardrobe toppling towards me. I flung my arms out in order to try and stop it crashing down on me, but it was no good. The thing was far too heavy and it forced me down onto the staircase and pinned me there.

My mum heard the noise and yelled "what the hell is going on out there?"

To which my slightly muffled response was "The wardrobe's fallen on top of me".

To this day I can't explain how a large, heavy item of wooden furniture, that was sited on a perfectly level floor, could just topple on top of a nine year old child for no readily apparent reason. But it did...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 13:43, 5 replies)

*sniggers*
longer
solid piece of work
solid mahogony job
full length
hefty drawers
bottom
good measure
heading off
stood imposingly
down on me
forced me down
topple on top
muffled

hee hee hee ;o)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 13:58, closed)

There wasn't
a lion involved, was there? And perhaps a witch?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 14:34, closed)

Wasn't me
honest mister - a big boy did it and ran away!
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 16:27, closed)

You seem an amiable and friendly chap.
How on earth could you piss a wardrobe off.
( girlinthehole, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 17:24, closed)

^ No idea
But it obviously didn't like the look of me for some reason and decided to pounce...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 6 Jul 2008, 13:19, closed)