Hmm. The pissed moped one earlier reminds me of . . .
driving a moped, pissed.

When I was 16, the choice was either A Yamaha FS-1E (a fizzie, to the congiscenti), or a Suzuki AP50.

Being heterosexual, I got the fizzie. So did 3 of my friends. A couple of them got AP50s, and one stupid bastard got a Garelli bimatic. This was a bicycle with an engine, and considerably slower than the others.

To ensure we didn't lose him on our weekend jaunts to country pubs, we used to make him go in front, and would harass him by bumping into the back of him, etc. Unfortunately along with it's dire performance, the Garelli also had dire lights.

Cut to one fine evening, around midnight, six screaming mopeds traveling along windy country lanes in rural Gloucestershire, riders in various states of inebriation. Garelli boy manages to miss a bend in the road, and shoots off into a bush. 3 fizzies and 2 AP50s are following him, right? So, all 6 of us end up in a hedge in a mass of spinning wheels and hot exhaust pipes.

If we had been sober, it wouldn't have seemed funny at all.
(username failed moderation, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 15:43, 9 replies)

I must be sober, then.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 15:49, closed)

Nah, you're just
a bit slow.
(username failed moderation, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 16:02, closed)

That'll be it.
Only a cretin would find drink driving anything other than hysterical. I see that now.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 17:43, closed)

Reasons why drink driving is well lol:
1. You stand a good chance of killing a child then thinking about it every day for the rest of your life.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 20:17, closed)

Reasons why drink driving is well lol:
1. You stand a good very small chance of killing a child then thinking about it every day for the rest of your life.

I'm not trying to condone drink driving or anything. It's just that a good chance of killing a child is bollocks.
( The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 20:44, closed)

Well, between Christmas and new year's I do get mine to stand in the middle of the road at midnight wearing black.
An unconventional approach to parenting I know, but I like to think that it's character-building.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 20:56, closed)

Also, happy candle day and that.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 18 Feb 2013, 20:57, closed)

Oh, I get it.
We're having a sanctimonious pop at me for drunk driving.

Remember I was 16. If you had pointed out the stupidity of it at the time, I'd have laughed at you and told you to stop being a dick.

Nowadays, when someone points out the stupidity of it, I just laugh.

Now stop being a dick.
(username failed moderation, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 9:09, closed)

drink driving
teenagers on mopeds
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 19 Feb 2013, 0:48, closed)