Mine! All mine!
Years ago, at Bristol Poly, my mate Owen was out on the piss in Bristol. He got thrown out of the Fleece and Firkin, and was sitting outside the pub on the curb when he suddenly and calamitously hurled everything from the whole evening all over and around himself.

Some more-sober people came by at that moment and disgustedly asked him "did you do that?".

In his broad Welsh accent, he answered, proudly, while scooping it all together into a rancid, steaming puddle around his knees: "Yes, it's mine - all mine - and you can't have any of it!"

*EDIT - for the punchline pedant :)
(lustfish, Mon 11 Jan 2010, 19:04, 5 replies)

Nice story
though you destroy your own punchline with the parentheses at the end.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 11 Jan 2010, 19:49, closed)

*corrected

You were right; it flows better now (pun intended) :D
(lustfish, Mon 11 Jan 2010, 21:25, closed)

Just for the curious -
please enter the original line below.

It might be better second time around (gross ambiguity intentional).
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Tue 12 Jan 2010, 9:52, closed)

The last line used to read:

In his broad Welsh accent, he answered, proudly: "Yes, it's mine - all mine - and you can't have any of it!" (while scooping it all together into a rancid, steaming puddle around his knees)

:-)
(lustfish, Wed 13 Jan 2010, 20:48, closed)

You get a click now...
:)
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 13 Jan 2010, 14:11, closed)