Oh, and one the other way. Sort of...
During my time at uni, I had to do a year's industrial placement. Now, of all the exciting places I could have ended up in, I somehow found myself in Basingstoke.

Now if you're from Basingstoke, I apologise, but it's shite. I mean, imagine the most boring place you've ever been to, and take away the fun bits.

The only good things to do were:

1. Get drunk in the pub.
2. Get drunk at home.

I would do either one of those things for the 365 days I found myself in that hell-hole. I would have given George Best a run for his money.

Anyway, on one night of doing option 1, me and a friend decided to head back to my gaff, have a few more beers in front of Eurotrash or some C5 skin flick (I can't remember which).

Walking back, upon approaching my house, I see two figures leaning on the garden wall. Well, to be more specific, I saw one bloke stood up against the wall, and one woman kneeling infront of said bloke.

Oh yes. The fella was getting a nosh off the bird. On my garden wall.

Did they stop when we started to approach? No.

Did they stop as we walked past? No.

Did they stop as we shouted 'EVENING' at the top of our voices? No.

Did the guy instead turn his head round, wink, go 'ssssssssssssssssh' and turn back to appreciate the final straight? Yes.

Was she the biggest, ugliest and dirtiest thing you'd ever seen when she stood up to wipe her mouth? Fuck yes!

Did I fantasise about the situation later, fuelled by alcohol and helped along by said skin flick? Well, that's another story...
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Thu 11 Oct 2007, 21:45, Reply)