Public micturation
We seem to be having a series of these, so I'll toss in my own...

One night I was downtown and met up with a woman I met online for drinks. Nothing remarkable happened there, sad to say, so about midnight I headed home alone.

As I drove home I remembered that I needed some shampoo, so I decided to stop at the 24 hour drugstore that was en route. As I got out of my car a fairly well-dressed couple in their fifties got out of a sedan a few spaces over from me. They were both pretty clearly intoxicated, so apparently they had been out in the downtown bars- the woman was dressed in a leather miniskirt and striped blue stockings with a rather expensive looking jacket over her silk blouse. The man said that he needed to go in and get some cigarettes, and the woman said, "Well, I gotta pee."

"You're coming in with me then?"

"No, I'll take care of it here." And with that she proceded to lift up her leather miniskirt and peel down her striped pantyhose, revealing a large and complex tattoo on her right thigh- she was actually in very good shape I might add, so her legs were quite nice- and squatted down on the pavement.

Bear in mind that this was a very well lit parking lot, they were parked right next to the building, and she was in the space between our cars with her growler an inch off the pavement. And I was standing about fifteen feet from her at the time. And, being almost six feet tall, it's not as if I'm incon-fucking-spicuous. I know damned well that she saw me as I was getting out of my car because she had smiled at me.

I stopped in shock for a moment, but then kept going as the steaming reeking river made its way across the parking lot to the storm drain. I managed to avoid eye contact with either of them as I went in, and they were gone when I emerged.

As this was a 24 hour store in a good section of town and a brand new building less than a year old, I wondered why the hell she didn't just go in and use the bathroom there. Then I remembered that smile she gave me...

The possibilities were just too horrid to contemplate further. By the time I got home I really felt the need for that shower.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Fri 12 Oct 2007, 22:22, Reply)