Nicked from elsewhere -
Here's a doozy. I went up to the bottle-shop to get some beers after work 1 night many years ago in my Ford Escort Ghia (auto - & that's important later). Completely straight, sane & sober. Come out of the bottle-o (where I know the guys quite well), jump in the car. Won't start.
Now to be fair this beauty did have some dicky electrics so within about half-an-hour I end up cleaning the battery terminals, checking the alternator, starter-motor & the plugs and points (steadily gathering a crowd of blokes all offering little bits of advice). Eventually Clayton (who worked @ the bottle-o but was a drinking buddy at the local pub) suggested that I might want to put the car in "park" or "neutral" rather than "drive" in future in order to start my car with automatic transmission...
Car in park, starts 1st time & off I go home rather sheepishly to enjoy my beers. The missus just about wet herself laughing.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 16 Oct 2011, 1:13, 2 replies)

I hope I'm wrong but I have a suspicion I replaced a solenoid on an old Daimler because of this very thing.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Sun 16 Oct 2011, 1:22, closed)

Had this with my current landie. But the problem was I'd had issues with the starter motor terminal working loose, so you couldn't start it. Every time this happened, you're filled with a sense of dread of "oh shit, has it given up completely, it's pissing it down outside and I've now got to crawl underneath and wiggle the wire". Luckily a quick check of N/P and it burst back into life...
( Alex Save a Tree, Eat a Beaver!, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 0:10, closed)