Military Winging
Back when I was just a wee corporal, I got transfered to a new unit, which did CBRN recon (Chemical, Biological, Radiological, Nuclear reconaissance). It so happened that a certification exercise was scheduled the next week.

The Setup: Our two Bio guys got sick. Bad sick. On the morning of the exercise. Which we couldn't call off, since "readiness" is part of the judging criteria. Boss Woman tells me that I'm it and to suit up. Now, I did do something like this a few years before, as a civvie firefighter. TOP MAN, right?

Anyway, we suit up, grab our gear, and enter a room in a coal power plant full of pipes, lab equipment, and general crap.

The Setup part deux: It turns out that the (also new) team leader was a total spacker. Physically and mentally uncoordinated, he didn't even know what he was doing half of the time (We do forensic sampling, and he contaminated pretty much every piece of evidence he touched). The 2IC saw this, and got him to swap patches with me.

The execution: It turns out that except for different radio talk, the military version of this is pretty much like the civvie version. So, never having been one, I winged the whole team leader thing, got good samples, good evidence, and prevented a (simulated) weaponized botulinum toxin attack on a football stadium.

Later, a note turned up in our in tray:

"We know you pulled a bait-and-switch on us. Consider this an inofficial commendation for the corporal, and tell the team leader he's an idiot. Be glad we like you enough not to fail you on your certification.
-The Judges"

The Fallout: A 500 euro bonus for "Services beyond the scope of normal duties", and a glowing recommendation for Officer Training. Result!
(GermanGuy invaded on, Thu 28 Mar 2013, 13:56, 7 replies)

As they say in Germany, I understand
"We have a weiner!"
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 28 Mar 2013, 14:06, closed)

Why thank you, kind sir!
(GermanGuy invaded on, Thu 28 Mar 2013, 15:03, closed)

I think you meant "Wiener"
But what's a sausage-based euphemism between friends?
( Ghoti Fingers, Thu 28 Mar 2013, 17:52, closed)

It can make or break the friendship.

And "Weiner" would be "One who cries (male)".
(GermanGuy invaded on, Thu 28 Mar 2013, 20:47, closed)

So Vag was right.
|¦:¬D|
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 30 Mar 2013, 11:17, closed)

:D
Nice one.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 29 Mar 2013, 9:31, closed)

A racounteur
I always gaze the signature lines to work out whether someone is worth reading. You sir, have joined the list of contributors that I now "must read". Please keep posting.
(justin(e), Mon 1 Apr 2013, 10:09, closed)