I have won:
1. The Hamlyn New Junior Encyclopedia
As below, in 1974, aged 7:

The theme of the competition was "Safety on the Farm" and I drew someone drowning in a slurry pit. Yummy!

2. A Ferguson Videostar VHS video recorder
Gibbs SR toothpaste (remember them?) ran an on-pack competition in the early 80s where you had to name the owners of the smiles of some contemporary slebs. People like Kenny Everett, Freddie Mercury - piss easy ones with identifiable facial hair, etc. As with most compos back then, there was a tie-break where you had to complete a phrase with something they could use in their ads rather than pay an agency to think something up. in this case, I use Gibbs SR toothpaste because... which I finished off with "...it makes a smile a smile". Gimme a break, I was 14, and it won!!
It was one of the first front-loading VHS recorders, about the size of a Mini Cooper, and it came with Volumes 1 & 2 of The Best of The Kenny Everett Video Show (the one on Thames TV without the canned laughter and with Hot Gossip, which filled my wank bank for most of the rest of the 80s) and it lasted about 20 years.

3. £7,000 cash on the "You Say, We Pay" quiz on Richard and Judy

It would have been more, but I didn't recognise Kirsty Gallagher's photo. I was on the dole, so it all went on paying the mortgage and bills, unfortunately. But it did make the difference between losing and not losing my house, which was nice.

I've also won loads of pub quizzes and stuff - I've been barred (well, asked not to come on quiz nights, anyway) from three because I won too many times and the other punters stopped coming if they thought I was going to be there. Serves the pub right for picking such easy questions.

Yes, I ninja-edited. So sue me.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 15:20, 4 replies)

Before anyone asks, the "C" stands for Conrad.

( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 15:31, closed)

Damn
I thought I'd tracked you down

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_C._Smith
(username failed moderation, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 16:07, closed)

Stalker alert.

(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 16:10, closed)

Ahh. A Llangibby boy...
...I once nearly ran over an old lady in Llangibby. Good times...
(Megamoss, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 16:14, closed)