Milk, effing loads of it!
Job placement in Glasgow between school and college was described as work experience, in reality it was to check hundreds of thousands of cartons of long life milk for microbial infection. Seems that one of the three layers of coating on the cartons had been wrongly manufactured which allowed “beasties and bugs” (that was the technical description given to me) to infect the milk and the result was called a “blower” (another technical term) due to the bacterial activity within the milk and the produced gas they made.

Three weeks, hundreds of pallets of milk and a good eye for “blowers” and I was promoted. I got to drive the forklift.

Five minutes into my new position, sticks forklift into reverse, hits the shelving behind, knocks one of the support beams out……57,600 pints of UHT Longlife milk hit the deck, exploding like Peter North on some birds face!

Everyone was completely covered in the shit, and being summer (read the only hot day of the year in Scotland), everyone started to stink within about an hour. This of course did not affect me as I was ejected from the premises within 5 minutes of the incident. After 30 years I still refuse to drink longlife milk.
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 12 May 2007, 5:30, Reply)