speaking of which
my friend broke his bum-hole after being pushed onto a spike by a cabbie in Rio last week.

He has to go back to england for 3 months to have his arse-hole reconstructed.
( asparagus time Is in Brazil., Tue 26 Dec 2006, 14:51, archived)

ouch
a doctor once told me that a guy came into A&E with a jar of colman's mustard up his arse, hadn't had a shit in 2 weeks and it was starting to hurt.

They had to remove his sphincter muscle to get it out. Now he's incontinent of faeces and has to wear a nappy at the ripe old age of 17.

BE WARNED!
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Dec 2006, 14:53, archived)

I find this hard to believe.
Why would they have to remove his sphincter muscle? The damn thing went in, didn't it?
( Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Tue 26 Dec 2006, 14:57, archived)

I heard it straight from the doctor's mouth
and colman's mustard jars are wider at the bottom than at the top

as is the patient now
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 26 Dec 2006, 14:58, archived)

Still, it went in?
Seems like an ass-ectomy is a pretty severe procedure to get it out.

I'd go for an 'ouch that hurt' over losing my ass any day!
( Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Tue 26 Dec 2006, 15:06, archived)