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I did that thing where you lean forward and clutch your chest like you're having a heart attack
it burnt all the way down

I could probably sue someone over this
(, Wed 13 May 2009, 1:49, archived)
The frying pan manufacturer, and possibly your gas supplier too.
Those cunts failed to warn you of the danger.
(, Wed 13 May 2009, 1:55, archived)
Sue the chicken for malpractice.
Or sue Dave Trouser. You won't need a reason, you'll win anyway.
(, Wed 13 May 2009, 1:58, archived)