Dear Baldmonkey.
I'm 20, and a student.

However, I'm going bald. What can I do to stop this?
( WHARRGARBL, Sat 16 May 2009, 15:35, archived)

Baldness is caused by testosterone.
If you are going bald early, you have lots of testosterone.

Therefore you're just more of a man than most people your age.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 16 May 2009, 15:36, archived)

Oooh, I didn't know that.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 16 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

However, your baldness is obviously caused by something else,
as you're a pathetic little emo nancy boy.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 16 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

Clearly.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 16 May 2009, 16:07, archived)

haha, you fucking bald cunt

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 16 May 2009, 15:41, archived)

What?
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 16 May 2009, 15:47, archived)

stop being so shit that your own follicles wither and die from embarrasment

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 16 May 2009, 15:43, archived)