I never went to university.
It is a well-established fact that I am thick as two short planks.
( Batsgirl, Sun 17 May 2009, 11:25, archived)

At least you could probably work out how long the short planks are
and how many you'd need to build a short pier.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 17 May 2009, 11:26, archived)

But a long pier,
that's going to need ADVANCED MATHS.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sun 17 May 2009, 11:33, archived)

The squaw on the hippopotamus type maths?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 17 May 2009, 11:34, archived)

And a brick pier.
It's just not going to happen.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Sun 17 May 2009, 11:36, archived)