Tie them to a chair, and give them the rubber hose treatment, until they confess?
Or just interpret the data in such a way that "I carry an AK-47, and lead the East Cheam Massive on regular crime sprees" becomes "I stay at home and play far too much X-box"?

Either way, I salute your dedication to the truth!
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 4 Jul 2005, 10:48, archived)