Anyone got a spare wobble-ometer ?
I think the one at St James' Park broke Saturday afternoon.

Poor old JMG and the NUFC fans....
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

I have terrible wind

( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

DISGUSTING

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:51, archived)

*parp*

( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

*Covers nose and mouth with jumper*
Errrrgh! Miss, Miss! Spong has farted!
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:55, archived)

*grins like a mong*

( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

Me too. We can be guff buddies.
I'll poot out one into a jiffy bag if you want? Send it to you for that 'Mmmmm can you smell fresh bread?' freshness.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

It'll get confiscated by MAF

( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:56, archived)

Only because they want to smell it too. dirty beggers.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 18 May 2009, 9:57, archived)

We say "can you smell smoke?" when someone farts
it makes everyone sniff, it's hilarious!
( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:00, archived)

Mine's always been..."mmmmmm fresh bread!" people really get a lung full then.
Doesn't work too well if you've just blown the sheets off though with a eggy pump.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:02, archived)

classy
I will try that next time
( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:03, archived)

But the sheets/duvet are useful
You can use them as a crude set of bellows for wafting your 'goods' the unsuspecting face of your loved one.

N.B. They might not love you very long if you do this regularly.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:05, archived)

Ever heard
of a dutch oven ?
(CIIJASIIE Fanny Scratching in Cock Lane, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:09, archived)

Indeed I have.
I prefer the bellows method as you can catch them unawares.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:14, archived)

If Hull and Newcastle both win,
the Unwashed will go down.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 18 May 2009, 9:53, archived)

^this
EDIT: as long as they get beat tonight
(likeajackhammer, Mon 18 May 2009, 10:03, archived)