So says the winner of
the Luton & Dunstable Mercury's Gappiest Smile competition.
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:21, archived)

It was all going so well,
until the local Tesco sacked me for setting off the barcode readers.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:23, archived)

Worry not, Mr Munch
I hear the local golf course is looking for bunker rakes
( Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:27, archived)

All the sand I can eat!

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 9:29, archived)