THINGS ARE HAPPENING ON THE INTERNET

( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sat 30 May 2009, 23:54, archived)

Best stay INDOORS!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 30 May 2009, 23:55, archived)

I KNOW!
I'm still going through both Pimm's and beer, JMG. Any advice?
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sat 30 May 2009, 23:55, archived)

Hit the cider for the threesome.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sat 30 May 2009, 23:57, archived)

No cider :(
I may have to hit the Bitter instead.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sat 30 May 2009, 23:58, archived)

I personally don't drink at home. Very rarely.
Alcohol that is.
Tonight I am with Pepsi Max.


My advice to the the rest of the internet is to try and be better at things.
Each day try and be a bit better at the nicer things in life.
Such as. Going outside, feeding the ducks. Attacking local ugly people.
Anything that gets your heart going a bit, that isn't related to a scathing remark made on the internet.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 30 May 2009, 23:57, archived)

Actually, I now no longer have a job and think I should go out and do something productive with my time. Suggestions JMG?

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Sat 30 May 2009, 23:59, archived)

Punch disabled kids.

( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:00, archived)

Run a bank. Run a mile! Always face the crowd with a smile.
Never let the darker days get you down. There's always happiness to be found the following day.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 0:01, archived)

Or punch disabled kids.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 0:01, archived)

*fist pump*
*bows to cheering spectators*
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:01, archived)

I was drinking Pepsi Max during the FOOTBALL, JMG.
I am now drowning my sorrows due to the actions of the dirty Cockney gang.

Big Dunc wouldn't have stood for Drogba's antics.

YOU'D KNOW. We sold him to you by accident, once.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:00, archived)

He once beat up two Roma defenders.
Happy times.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 0:01, archived)

He also smashed a burglar in the face and went to prison
THAT'S A PROPER STRIKER, THERE.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:02, archived)

PLAY ON!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sun 31 May 2009, 0:04, archived)

*forearm smash*
*mocks injured stewards*
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:05, archived)

What's happened to the Yak? How injured is he?

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Sun 31 May 2009, 0:02, archived)

He'll be back for next season
Not sure if this was good or bad. His penalty against Pompey was almost as bad as Berbatov's.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:03, archived)

Ignore the beer

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:00, archived)

I have one can left in the freezer
I'll be nicking Bitter soon.
( Derpasaurus DOG FARTS, Sun 31 May 2009, 0:04, archived)