If I wore sandpaper pants then you would hear the sound of a match striking whenever I got an errection.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 17:28, archived)

I would like to think that the sound of that would be represented in a strip cartoon entitled "DG's Sandpaper Pants" as *sccrrriii-iiit*
( vladimir, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 17:31, archived)