Kirk Sandall.
It's a weak rhyme, but closer than most.

Not as close as Birstall, mind.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 6 Jun 2009, 1:41, archived)

There was a young fella from Pendle
whose birds cunts surprisingly dental
she gave him a nosh
& ripped his cock off
which unsurprisingly sent him a bit mental
( broadsword, Sat 6 Jun 2009, 1:47, archived)

*applause*

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 6 Jun 2009, 1:48, archived)

Hoorah!

( broadsword, Sat 6 Jun 2009, 1:50, archived)