I think you'll need a hydraulic jig, six heavy duty chains, a peen hammer and some delicate coaxing with a sledgehammer.
It's the only cure
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

IT DIDN'T WORK LAST TIME

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

cut'n'shut's the only answer then

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 15:59, archived)

Maybe.
I think a new spine or smaller boobs are in order.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 16:00, archived)

I reckon an underbra that ran supporting legs down your side to your hips would be good
a bit like a spidery corset. Then your shoulders wouldn't hurt.

Either that or really powerful magnets on your nipples, and the same polarity ones sewn into your knickers so that they repelled eachother
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

I shall investigate these

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 16:04, archived)