Me fatha youws'd ter say, "doon't ever drink t'watta in Sheffield" and by god he wor rate there, fuckin' 'orrible stuff it is.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 5 Mar 2011, 23:38, archived)

thi favver sarnds like my typer bloke
if wi kayp torkin like this all them suvverners'll get boord n piss off
(whorsepower needs an amusing sig, Sat 5 Mar 2011, 23:40, archived)

Never mind southerners, folk had trouble understanding me on the outskirts of Leeds.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 5 Mar 2011, 23:42, archived)

people on the outskirts of leeds have trouble understanding what the fire in the sky is
they think its the light from the moon reflecting off a large watch.
(whorsepower needs an amusing sig, Sat 5 Mar 2011, 23:50, archived)