it's getting late.
how do you intend to keep the vampires out tonight?
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 0:54, archived)

apparently if you spread salt over a vampire's grave they'll be compelled to count every last grain when they rise, because they're ocd or something
i bet they have aspergers and all sorts of anxiety disorders too, you could probably keep them away by inviting them to big party with people they don't know
( Lightguy hail satan, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:02, archived)

Or give them a pen and paper and a picture of York minster to copy

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:04, archived)

I'll not be sleeping due the the big fecking spider I found in my bed just now
Because you know that thing they say about things laying eggs in your eyes and nose? It's true.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:03, archived)

you know the story about how you accidentally eat 8 spiders in your sleep over a lifetime? it's actually 8 spiders a night

( Lightguy hail satan, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:04, archived)

I know
:(((((
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:07, archived)

Or perhaps, catch it and throw it out the window.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:10, archived)

Fuck that
Cunt'll come back with his mates
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:29, archived)

english house spiders are not only the fastest running spiders in the world
they also come back intot he house when you put them outside, they like living in houses, hence why they're called house spiders.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:33, archived)

It's a spider not a gang.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:45, archived)

i thought you had me on ignore?

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:15, archived)

Well that solves the eternal mystery of who gives a fuck.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:16, archived)

*runs off crying*

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:17, archived)

Why?
I don't ignore anyone. I just let the autisms like JMG and Dekion think I do. Gives them a little frisson.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:18, archived)

oh, my mistake it was broadsword

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:25, archived)

*ignores*

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:29, archived)

*runs off crying*

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 1:30, archived)