Rude Monika who cuts my hair is from Poland
She rubs her fanny on your elbow if your arms over hang the chair arms too much. She is also thin. More as it happens.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sun 19 Jun 2011, 11:04, archived)

My barber occasionally rests her massive tits on my shoulders.
One tit over each shoulder, like some boob shawl or something.

And once she couldn't be bothered to walk round me to cut my hair so just spun the chair
( magnum, Sun 19 Jun 2011, 11:17, archived)

Did you make that cartoon "uyuyuyuyuuyuy" noise
as your eyeballs rattled around in their sockets?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sun 19 Jun 2011, 11:20, archived)

Yeah, and when the chair stopped
my eyes kept spinning
( magnum, Sun 19 Jun 2011, 11:22, archived)