Hide the ring up her vagina when she's asleep.Then disguise yourself as a gynaecologist and arrange for her to come in for a smear test. When you examine her say "there appears to be a growth' in a worried voice and when she starts sobbing because she thinks she has cancer you can pull out the ring and propose.
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 22 Jun 2011, 14:34,
archived)
