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This is a question The B3ta Cookbook

We're bored of beans on toast. Pretend you're on Pinterest and share your cooking tips and recipes. Can't cook? Don't let that stop you telling us about the disastrous shit you've made.

(, Thu 28 Jun 2012, 21:56)
Pages: Popular, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

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Smeg cooker
Once, in a state of advanced mindfuckery, a mate and I decided to try out all the recipes mentioned in Red Dwarf.

The results were as follows:

- Gazpacho Soup: yes, it tastes better warmed up.

- Kippers Vindaloo: amazing, the power of the curry matched by the strength of the smoked fish. It's become a favourite recipe. Mind you, it's best to avoid human company on the following day, or at least those sections of society where massive, room-clearingly evil farts are not acceptable.

- Triple-Decker Fried Egg Sandwich with Chilli Sauce and Chutney: another revelation, a real treat when hungover or on a shaky come-down.

Clearly, those boys know what they're talking about.*

Another example: page 61 IS the rudest one in Lolita.
(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 10:35, 9 replies)
What about Listers crack pipe recipe whilst cracking one off the wrist followed by raping some bird down the cab office
totally smeg
(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 10:53, closed)
Crack, yes.
Rape, no. He was acquitted. Remember?
(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 12:52, closed)
You ought to try the Shammi Kabab Diablo
Do you have a cow syringe full of lemon juice?
(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 11:00, closed)
*paging Monty Boyce*

(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 12:21, closed)
Sorry I'm late.

(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:36, closed)
I, too have tried the triple-fried-egg-chilli-chutney-sandwich.
It tasted superb. Went well with a screwdriver (drink, not tool) for breakfast.
Neither beer nor wine go well on cornflakes, however.
(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 13:14, closed)
Ah yes
That sandwich is state of the art
(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 13:33, closed)
It's the state of the floor I'm worried about...

(, Fri 29 Jun 2012, 15:47, closed)
Smegging smeg off you smeg-head!!!!!!!!!!!

I just said 'smeg'!!!!!!!!!
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:37, closed)

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