Apparently a geek...
I am apparently a geek. Yet I've never seen a full episode of Star Trek, only watched the 6 Star Wars films and not explored the other stuff in there, as well as never having watched any of the major sci-fi programs on TV apart from Farscape. But Farscape's ace. (Which, coincidentally, my ex got me into, even though she claimed she wasn't a geek.)

However, I have been known to toy around with computers and rebuild them from scratch, have been known to have almost every single games console released in the UK, with the exception of the PS3, have been a WoW addict (I've been clean... 1 month now!), can quote about half of Metal Gear Solid 1, have been known to roleplay through almost all of the original Resident Evil dialogue with friends helping me out by being other characters, and actually recreating Resident Evil scenes a lot (i.e. the Super Leon-esque scenes from RE4, with the lasers and the throwing oneself out of the window from great heights and rolling and then leaping up and killing others. Or at least airsofting others.)

I have a small fascination with coats too, to the degree where if I don't think the coat will go with anything I own, I won't get it. I'm also saving up the pennies to order a custom-made Peacekeeper trenchcoat off the internet in April. Which will go nicely with my trousers, and if I'm really lucky, will be able to get the PK vest too and actually dress up as John Crichton, just without the cantaloupe melons being smuggled in my arms. Cookie to anyone who gets the reference.

I've also learnt to speak the Old Tongue from the Wheel of Time series, as well as all the languages used in the Memory Sorrow and Thorn trilogy, although thats mainly from a combination of boredom and loving languages. And lastly, I play D'n'D. Not so much nowadays. I want to start again though with all my mates and try and do stuff properly. So yeah, I guess I am a geek.
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 16:13, 3 replies)

it makes me happy when i finish a phone call or whatever
and the clock, bottom right of the screen, reads 13:37.
Once a day I am truly L33t. Yay.
( Fathter Puddytat Kill Kill dat widdle boid is mine on, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 16:09, 2 replies)

Championship Manager
I used to play it morning, noon, and night. I've kinda given it up now.

Anyway, I played so much that my career used to go on into the 2030/40s. By that time all the in-game personel are completely made up and just on a cycle of ethnic names for their country.

Nevertheless I used to produce match-day programmes featuring 'interviews' with Peter Mudd (star centre-back) or Rene Esposito (the new exciting Peruvian winger)

Look out for next week's edition, a one-on-one with star fitness coach Alan Abrahams! Doesn't exist.

I was Celtic by the way and we won 35 European trophies.
(Waspard has your wank bank account details, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 16:07, 1 reply)

Oh, God. This brings it all back.
Making Red Dwarf text adventures on my Amiga at the age of 11? Check.
(it's supposed to look like that, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 16:04, Reply)

I share my birthday with William Shatner...
And I'm proud of it too!
(WarezWolf I share my birthday with William Shatner, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 16:01, 2 replies)

I must be the coolest person on this site.....
Yet in real life I'm not cool.


Hey! that's cool.
( girlinthehole, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 16:01, 4 replies)

nerdism
im still playing the c64 game creatures and i still aint finished it, been playing since i was 9 yrs old im now 26 and to add more nerd to me resume my username comes from that game also my email address

length 18yrs and counting!
(fluffyfangs drinks, smokes and hangs round with strange women, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:57, 2 replies)

Boots
She Who Must Be Ignored has just reminded me of my dirty little secret.

Boots. Not thigh-length PVC jobbies, but all the rest. I'm not quite Imelda Marcos, but...

Caterpillar Work Boots. Everyday use, 10 years old and going strong.
4 x Pairs walking boots, used according to weather, terrain etc. 3 pairs with Goretex, one in leather.
2 x pairs desert boots. One for 'normal' use, one for keeping ticks off my legs when lurking in the undergrowth in the summer.
All terrain sandals or whatever posh flipflops are called these days. 1 good and one cheap slobbing pair.
Hunter wellies.
Road trainers, cross trainers, very angry trainers.
Stockmans boots for when I want to apply accelerator and brake pedals simultaneously (noisy).
In the loft on the retired list, we have DMs so perfectly broken in that I keep swearing I'll resole them one day, combat boots similar, and I think there may even be some cowboy ones up there as well.
Then there are the work ones....

My footwear cleaning kit is a small crate, I own at least 4 different sorts of polish, plus waxes, sprays and so forth. I find traditional boot 'bulling' relaxing, god help me.

And then there's the rest of the 'outdoor' kit. I can't go past an outdoor shop with a 'sale' sign, it's just a physical impossibility. Quite how I have ended up buying (since New Year): cyalumes/Maglite strobe kit/a second steel thermos/mini carabiners/yet more socks/new Ron Hills/yet more stuff sacks is a mystery known only to the Gods. And Mastercard.

In short, I am equipped to handle all the adverse weather conditions going, and what do I get?






Bloody Global Warming.




(Right, now to find best t'internet price on a Snugpak Rocket Pack. And I could do with that cool looking emergency strobe thingy. And one of those teeny JetBoil jobbies. And a new pair of Craghoppers. Someone sedate me before the share price of Karrimor goes up again)
(osok Rebel without a clue, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:55, 2 replies)

Latin
As a few others have already mentioned, I too did Latin A-level, and even now as a translator I get to deal with the odd bit here and there.

To this day, I can decline bellum-i-neuter in under 2 seconds. As chat up lines go, it's not the best.
(Crayola Oblongata Is it Monday?, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:53, 1 reply)

Planet of the Apes
My guilty pleasure. I love them all, although the reimagining (not a remake) by Tim Burton is a bit iffy.

I can tell the whole story (Planet of the Apes, Beneath The Planet of the Apes, Escape From The Planet of the Apes, Battle For The Planet of the Apes and Conquest Of The Planet of the Apes) and take great pleasure in how the whole story can begin with any episode and still come full circle. I'll admit to a few minor inconsitancies but they can all follow in logical sequence from any episode as long as they are continued in sequence.

I never liked the TV series much with speaking humans although this would fit in nicely with the years after 'Battle For...' when ape civilisation is in its infancy and humans still have the power of speech.

The Tim Burton version fits in a way as it is not set on Earth. This particular version isn't far of the story line set out in the book by Pierre Boulle, which is much more detailed and depicts the apes living in what appears to be the same stage of humans in the late 17th or early 18th century, with a few advancements such as motorcars and early experimentation into space travel (they already had early forms of aircraft). Towards the end of the book the apes had evolved to such a stage that they were able to use solar winds to travel through space using spacecraft with a 'sail' to take advantage of solar winds to increase velocity, and shrinking the craft to a smaller size whilst still allowing room for the occupants to relax (the book is based on the writings of the human astronauts account of live on the ape planet which is in turn found by an ape couple on 1 of their journeys through space).

I love Planet of the Apes.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:53, Reply)

I like to excel in my work
Which is why whenever i create new spreadsheets i colour code and rename every individual worksheet...

Main topics will be highlighted with bold colours. Any subsequent worksheets will be colour coded to match the main topic, where relevant, in a different colour shade of the primary worksheet(s)...

Yes!
(Nuclear Ninja like a radioactive Chuck Norris..., Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:51, 1 reply)

......
I play warhammer and warhammer 40k,
I have a growing collection of alien and predator merchendice,
almost all my books are science fiction,
i also play magic the gathering enough said....



length? 28 mm tall for the warhammer
(the heretic, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:46, Reply)

University set
I was asked as part of a presentation for a job interview to describe how my research could fit with the Department's existing research themes.

My slide show presented my research - in conjunction with their research - in the form of a Venn diagram with my research sitting firmly in the intersection.

It gets worse: I colour-coded the text in the sets as R, G and B with the text in the overlaps being the combination of the set colours.

Computer scientists are geeks by definition. They loved it. I got the job.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:45, Reply)

Chuckie Egg
I played Chuckie Egg for 6 hours straight. I had to be physically torn away from the keyboard.

I had so many lives they went off the screen, and my score was so massive I'm surprised the BBC micro model B could cope with it.

Nobody could beat me at chuckie egg, nobody.
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:45, 6 replies)

While I think of other reasons I'm a lady geek...
I used to be the membership secretary of ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:44, Reply)

Played
Monkey magic on the C64 Everyday for a year solid, the problem with the game was when the score reached the maximum number of digits it just reset back to 0.

Also played every single dizzy the egg game to death on the amstrad cpc 464, c16 and C64.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dizzy_series

*edit* best QOTW for a while
( Trollman, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:42, 6 replies)

I met my boyfriend on the interweb
That's not particularly nerdy, is it?

The slightly more geeky thing is that it wasn't because I found his picture on the online dating site maddeningly hot--in fact, I filed it under "within my league". What clinched it was that he had put down "Tolkien" as his favourite author.

Four years later, my love for him was reaffirmed when he admitted that his favourite bit of Lord of the Rings was the appendix.
( Queen of Cheesecake, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:39, 1 reply)

Not a nerd...
...although I nearly managed to rip my own arm off, trying to make a powered exoskeleton.
Also, in an attempt to make one of those muscle-stimulating machines (Why pay good money for something you can make yourself?) I hurt myself quite badly. Turns out you need a lot less power than my calculations suggested. Unfortunately, turning the power off again was hindered by having decided to connect BOTH arms up to the prototype. So; Not a nerd, just thick.
(Lump, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:38, Reply)

Does this count?
I know my way around the Spectrum version of Sabre Wulf off by heart.
Until recently, I last played it 20 years ago.

I'm now a member of the 'I've got 100%* on Sabre Wulf' club**.

When I replayed it, I knew exactly where to go.

*visiting every screen.
** club may not exist.
( scoshi pretending to diet since, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:37, Reply)

cleft palate
'e', by gum
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:33, Reply)

I’ve been working it out…

and I am precisely 2.54368966577289% nerdier than all of you.

So there.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:30, 3 replies)

DVDs
Mrs Just1lady has a habit of alphabetising the DVDs, but she sorts them by the size of the case first. Fair enough, it does make it look neater but my kids like to choose a dvd to watch at bedtime on a weekend. Depending on how late they decide to go to bed determines the length of the film. Going to bed at 10pm does not entitle them to watch Return of the King for example.

To aid this choosing procedure, I reordered the DVDs by running time. Just1lady went ape-shit and as soon as I left the room she had them all off the shelf and put them back into order.

Right, thought I, I reordered them in order of their rating on IMDB.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:29, 4 replies)

geek therapy
Few people know about it, but there is a kind of rehab centre for nerds in northern Califiornia. Desperate dweebs are referred there and undergo a strict regime of resocialisation. There are no computers, no access to role-playing, and patients are stripped of all figurines at reception. The group therapy sessions are infamous for their brutal truth-telling.

Therapist: So - Kevin, Marcus and Reginald - how are you feeling?
Kevin: Can I be called Dreamlord Agthanax?
Therapist: No. We've talked about that. You are Kevin.
Reg: Who am I?
Therapist: This is not a role play, Reg. You are yourself.
Reg: What are my powers?
Therapist: You have no powers. You are simply yourself.
Reg: Garthrex.
Therapist: [sighs] No. Reginald. Garthrex does not exist. NOW - the subject of today's session is girls.
Marcus: Can I go to the toilet?
Therapist: No. Nurse says if you masturbate anymore your anaemia will kill you. You have to get used to the idea of girls.
Reg: Like Princess Arimea. I've had her.
Therapist: Real girls, Reg. Not virtual ones. I have arranged for some real girls to visit us today so that you can interact.
Kevin: 'Ooh, Nursey - I like it firm and fruity!'
Therapist: Ah, Blackadder again. Try to avoid saying things like that when the girls arrive, Kevin, or they'll think you're a total knob.
Marcus: I need to go to the toilet!
Therapist: Take your hand out of your pockets and the feeling will go away. Ah - here are the girls now...
[Enter three hot girls wearing tight tops and mini-skirts]
Therapist: Now, boys. Just chat to the girls in a normal way.
Marcus: [to girl 1] Do you prefer Episode 4 or the Phantom Menace?
Girl 1: Sorry - do you speak English?
Marcus: Star Wars! Which is your favourite?
Girl 1: I like William Shatner. He was hot in it.
[Marcus keels over with an aneurism and dies]
Kevin: [to girl 2] I made an animated homepage for my Warhammer site with Java Script!
Girl 2: Is that a computer thing?
Kevin: Yes! I've got an Apple Airbook with 15,000 tetrabytes of RAM.
Girl 2: How about your cock? Is it girthy?
[Kevin's eyes pop out of his head and he's he's rushed to the infirmary]
Reg: [to girl 3] Can I touch your boobs?
Girl 3: If you buy me a WKD.
Therapist: Finally! A breakthrough.
(frankspencer, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:28, 7 replies)

I've just this second received an email
called "Metadata Monthly"

Your honour, I rest my case.
( admiral crunch holds the newsreader's nose squarely, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:25, 1 reply)

POKE 23609,0

( Smallbrainfield, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:23, 6 replies)

Maths
I used to look forward to maths at college, and revelled in doing inane exercises in algebra for the fun of it.
In a pub on one occasion I used simultaneous equations to prove that the barman had shortchanged me.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 6 Mar 2008, 15:22, 1 reply)