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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Nice one Chompy.
I note with interest that 60s boogeyman and US justice system anomaly Charles Manson is up for his 13th parole application. Whilst there isn’t a doubt in my mind that he was and almost certainly is Very Bad News, he is 77 years old. He is also inside for the Tate/LaBianca murders when there is no suggestion that he actually carried them out himself.

He’s still locked up for being the personification of the ‘dirty hippies’ who ‘ruined’ America in the late 60s as much for anything else. He is a symbol of the brief spell when ‘old skool’ America lost its grip and for that reason I suspect he’ll never be let out. They were fucking terrified of him, to the extent that he was forbidden from giving evidence at his own trial in case he somehow hypnotized the jury. Seriously.

How fucking medieval is that? Stupid cunts.

Who else is a stupid cunt?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:09, Reply)
You?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:11, Reply)
OH man HARSH.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:12, Reply)
I'm a KFC zinger burger.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:14, Reply)
If I hadn't just had my lunch I would really want one of them.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:17, Reply)
we had a market outside the office today
fucking amazing. arancini, paella, burmese curries, thai curries, chorizo sandwiches... i approve of this sort of thing.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:18, Reply)
Hurrah!

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:21, Reply)
i did eat one arancini too many though
i feel distinctly sick. still, an afternoon's inactivity reviewing schedules of dilapidations should fix that up real nice.

what are you doing for easter, al?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
At the risk of incurring a barrage of abuse from you about how boring I am
I will be decorating my hall, running 15 miles, going to Jamie Olivers BBQ restaurant for a friends birthday and seeing the in-laws.

What about yourself?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:26, Reply)
the first one i'm not gonna lie to you, pretty dull
the second i am jealous. the third is awesome, even as a vegetarian. make sure you order the bread - you get this amazing tower of toasted breads of all different types. the fourth, they should have bought you easter eggs. WIN. so no, you're ok this time.

me - out tonight, seeing friends tomorrow, ex on sat, working sunday, off on holiday from sunday til the following friday, wooo.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:36, Reply)
You deserve a little abuse for your misuse of a reflexive pronoun.
What are you, a receptionist trying to sound posh?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:43, Reply)
Do you even eat chorizo?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:32, Reply)
No, but she loves a fruity sausage.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
who doesn't?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:36, Reply)
I like the story in his autobiography about him screwing the preacher's daughter.
The preacher came round to bollock him, so he gave him some acid.
"Charlie is love".
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:13, Reply)
Your Mum.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:16, Reply)
I like his idea of 'Helter Skelter'. An apocalyptic race war is just what's required.
CM for President!
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:16, Reply)
samantha brick?
i got told i was better looking than her today (by my brother, lest this makes it sound more exciting than it really was). and it wasn't meant as a compliment ("even you are... etc"). it could become the left-handed compliment of the day.

also did anyone see "the undateables"? still LOLing at the tourettes dude whose date was running late. "FUCKING CUNT! FUCKING WHORE!! SLUT!!" haha.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:16, Reply)
What channel was that on? Want to find it online.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:19, Reply)
channel 4, so it should be on the iplayer thing
was part 1 of 3. there was also a dwaff and a genuine assburger.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:21, Reply)
Excellent. Ta.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
WANKER!
fucking WHORE!
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
WANKBUBBLECUNTFUCKERDOGSHIT

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:26, Reply)
It was on Channel "Shotgun Marriage"

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
The lad with tourettes is from Southport
One of my friends went to school with him, supposedly he was just fairly quiet there.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
he had a scouse accent on him
and they'd set him up with a girl in london. why? surely 200 miles is even more of a dealbreaker than being called a FUCKING WHORE?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:24, Reply)
I was cringing after the radio enthusiast started eating his date's chips. It was so awkward.
In fact all of it was pretty gutwrenching.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:48, Reply)
Fucking hell, that sounds hideous

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:51, Reply)
Oh man, I gotta check it out

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:05, Reply)
Andrew Lansley
Given that the US have a track record of locking people up for long periods for lesser crimes it seems unlikely for him to ever be paroled. Also, despite not actually carrying out the murders, most legal systems have provision for joint enterprise in crime (I listened to a programme on the radio about it last night) and he was clearly directly involved in these murders.
But more importantly he is indirectly responsible for the group Kasabian and for this reason alone should never be freed.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
Manson not Lansley.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
I agree with Lansley being a fucking cunt.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:40, Reply)

michael gove
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
this sig is a lyric from some random band
tell me!
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)

It's a bowie song, slightly altered.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:24, Reply)

FUCKOFFQUENTBERT
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:24, Reply)
Are you the stealer of names?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:27, Reply)
It's Bobby's other account.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:32, Reply)

i DO Like a name change
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:33, Reply)
Oh
Well, that's just sad.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:33, Reply)

you're a fucking idiot.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:35, Reply)
pretty medieval
but he did kinda kill some folk, so let it ride.

i'll tell you who else is a massive cnut.
The man responsible for the bloody pandas at edinburgh zoo
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
He didn't kill anyone

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:49, Reply)
details schmetails
neither did osama, or bush, or blair, but they're still responsible.
besides, it was thinly veiled spam.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:54, Reply)
Penelope Dingle and Francine Scrayen
The difference between them is that I think Dingle has now been punished enough for her idiocy (she's dead), whereas in I hope Scrayen is severely punished for her actions (telling Dingle that only homeopathy will cure her cancer, because a psychic told her it would happen.)
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:39, Reply)
He played an important part in influencing alternative music in the 90s
No-one would've listened to Marilyn Bundy
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:49, Reply)
Darth, is PhillieJoe a cunt?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:53, Reply)
Tangled, is PhillieJoe a cunt?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:54, Reply)
I have heard that he is.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:57, Reply)
I also have heard the same.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:02, Reply)
I don't like to kick a man while he's down.
Or kick a man with downs.

Both apply here.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:57, Reply)
I'm not down
Honest :)
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:58, Reply)
There's a fat bald guy in the new B&Q ads admiring his new flooring (not oak) who looks like he has Downs

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:59, Reply)
Leave Al alone

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Are you telling me this is Al?
s3.amazonaws.com/data.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1b9msWu7P1qfyfvuo1_1280.jpg?AWSAccessKeyId=AKIAI6WLSGT7Y3ET7ADQ&Expires=1333720924&Signature=MF54GEd23U5UBUBvmBpBenkJCXA%3D
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:02, Reply)
I've just realised that this is a fat man appreciation site...

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:03, Reply)
Yes
I am telling you that THAT is Al
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:04, Reply)
Ted Bundy is by far my favourite serial killer.
I'm a big fan.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:00, Reply)
Me, I'm a Cunt
Ask anyone
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:49, Reply)
this is correct
the oven glove told me he never sleeps in the wet patch either
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:54, Reply)
Surely the wet patch is all contained within the oven glove?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:08, Reply)
HELLO!

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:54, Reply)
Whoever designed Outlook 2010 is most definitely a cunt
I've just had it installed as a result of getting a new work laptop and it's fucking impenetrable. I can only assume that Microsoft employ double agents in the pay of Apple, or insane people
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:54, Reply)
Really
I use it daily with no issues
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:57, Reply)
Yes, but, as we've established
you're a cunt
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:58, Reply)
Well what issues are you having
maybe I can help and all that
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:59, Reply)
He has URS

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:59, Reply)
I find gmail/yahoo/hotmail to be utterly retarded in comparison

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:58, Reply)
What OS are you using it on?
I had no problem with it on XP, but I've just upgraded to 7 at work, and it's annoying me.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 14:58, Reply)
i agree
as a result of it's existance, it's much easier for management to badger me and make me go to meetings, and much harder for me to deny all knowledge when there's a big fucking box with 'tedious meeting you're doomed to attend, and spend 2hrs wrestling with your suddenly leaden eyelids in a warm stuffy room with some dude droning on despite your having NO input and interest in it, and a shitload of other work to do- due in 5 minutes'
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:02, Reply)
you need to prioritise your workload better
ask yourself, are you busy or are you productive? If you want to have a catch up about how we can better leverage your skillset then drop me an email.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:05, Reply)
Could be worse. You could have to suffer Lotus Notes.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:06, Reply)
yeah it could be running on like Linux or something!! o.LOL

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:13, Reply)
It once took me 3 hours to find the 'send' button on that.
I asked 3 people if they could find it, and they couldn't eaither. Eventually it just appeared and we all could have sworn it was there all along.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)
burn the witch!
Put him in water and see if he floats
Or if he conjures up some floaties
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:04, Reply)
in
Other news I've been to hospital and have been given good drugs
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:11, Reply)
drugs are bad mmmkay

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:14, Reply)
these are legal
So it's okay
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:16, Reply)
Your face is a cunt.
I heard it was such a cunt, someone tried to shove a tampon in your dribbling gob.

So, have I missed any flounces, bertdowns or tiffs today?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)
Quentin took an overdose.
And is totally dead.

RIP Quints.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:31, Reply)
4EVA in ar hartz
lol jk
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:33, Reply)
Just as he and Battered had become mates.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
I know, its a tragedy really.
*sniff*
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:37, Reply)
Goodbye local hero :'(
www.guardian.co.uk/music/2012/apr/05/jim-marshall-amp-dies-88?newsfeed=true
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:37, Reply)
I met him once
Lovely chap, I own three of his Amps
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:10, Reply)
I want a Marshall fridge A LOT.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:13, Reply)
His local is quite near me, whenever he had lunch there he bought a round for everyone in the place.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:20, Reply)
I shall listen to this album tonight, in tribute.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blues_Breakers_with_Eric_Clapton

*awaits backlash from Monty*
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:17, Reply)
Whoever was in the bogs before me ten minutes ago is a cunt
Fucking HELL
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)
Did they not clean the glory hole after they used it?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:42, Reply)
No, the problem is that they did.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:45, Reply)
why were you in the ladies?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:45, Reply)
Know your enemy

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:54, Reply)
hi guys, i've missed you

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:59, Reply)
Oh thank GOD

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 15:59, Reply)
i know right? i was worried i was gone forever

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:01, Reply)
I was

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:02, Reply)
:O

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:03, Reply)
hoping you were dead

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:05, Reply)
well thats really quite bad, i hope taht you seek some counselling for your negative thoughts

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:06, Reply)
Imagine all the tributes though.
It would totally get newslettered, just like that girl who died whose boyfriend is over it and getting married to someone better.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:08, Reply)
but there is no-one better than me for rachelswipe to marry

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:10, Reply)
Then she will remain a spinster forever.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:13, Reply)
this is not news

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:14, Reply)
Well today's working out to be a thrill a minute /OT rollercoaster isn't it?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:15, Reply)
but i JUST ARRIVED

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:16, Reply)
You're not tall enough to ride on this CRAZY TRAIN.

Soz.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:17, Reply)
how tall you gotta be?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:22, Reply)
4'2"

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:22, Reply)
ah man, i'm only 5", gutted

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:32, Reply)
Hi Battered!

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:33, Reply)
No, Monty, it is not.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:17, Reply)
Shit isn't it?
I blame the fact none of you know what X-Com is.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:19, Reply)
I cannot even be arsed to look it up.
What is it, then?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:20, Reply)
It's a 1992 turn based stratergy game.
It's fucking excellent, takes probably a week solid to complete it.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:21, Reply)
I still play it.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:22, Reply)
I'll bet you do.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:22, Reply)

+ or care
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:20, Reply)
it's when your phone lines get cut off, duh

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:22, Reply)
I thought it was modern street slang
for being ejected from the Roman Catholic Church.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:23, Reply)
Well I'm pretty busy at the moment.
Tell us about your weekend plans. That will bring /OT up to standard for a few minutes.

*goes to make tea*
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:23, Reply)
Buying some shelves
then fuck all
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:24, Reply)
i'm playing pool tonight, true story

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:27, Reply)
If it's anything like my local pool place, it'll be jam packed full of cunts.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:28, Reply)
It's almost as if pool is for cunts or something.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:29, Reply)
this is true, but we're going out jsut to get away from the women

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:31, Reply)
Waiting to hear when I can see my daughter.
Going to Winchester to see my dear mama. And hopefully BOSHING some MUSHROOMS at some point.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:27, Reply)
are you doing a carbonara al funghi?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:32, Reply)
Yes and no.
Mainly no.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:33, Reply)
Torta Salata ai Funghi?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:35, Reply)
Tea ai funghi.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:37, Reply)
that sounds shit, at least have it with a foccacia

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:40, Reply)
I'm not really very keen on bread.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:42, Reply)
JUST AS WELL COS I HAVEN'T GOT ANY, RIGHT?!!!!

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:43, Reply)
dough!

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:54, Reply)
11 minutes of thought...

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:57, Reply)
i'm coming and going today
tracey's in, better things to do
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:01, Reply)
3 minutes of thought ...

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:02, Reply)
5 minutes of vacant staring

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:05, Reply)
two minutes to do that pre-cum thing

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:07, Reply)
it only takes a minute girl

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:07, Reply)
to fall in love
to f aaa llll in love
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:08, Reply)
Hey Rory!
I hear you got some turntables. Is this so?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:18, Reply)
Verily, it has come to pass that I have started my mid life crisis
Nice piece of furniture if nothing else, two qotw mark 5's, a staton 'battle' mixer, and a couple of monitors chucked in for good measure. Have started buying up vinyl, but it's turning out fucking pricey. Any suggestions gratefully received.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:27, Reply)
cunt cunt cunty cunt

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:24, Reply)
Yes?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:26, Reply)
how's your moustache?

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:27, Reply)
Fine, a bit damp where I've been chewing it, otherwise good.
And yours?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:28, Reply)
luxuriant
have you not used your moustache wax, yet?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:29, Reply)
It hasn't arrived in the post yet.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:18, Reply)
"All the way to my nuts!"

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:30, Reply)
In hollyoaks, one guy called it his Flavour Saver. He's a homosexual irish gangster, and probably one of my favorite characters in any bit of fiction [citation needed].

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:41, Reply)
hollyoaks makes those BT ads with students look like high art

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:45, Reply)
Hahahaha
Jesus Christ those ads are bad.
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:45, Reply)
Seems like a very similar situation to many of those held in Guantanamo
What would happen if Derren Brown robbed a bank in the USA?
(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:42, Reply)
Hopefully he'd be shot dead trying to escape, the dirty little queer.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 16:44, Reply)
Then he'd be Derren Brown Bread.

(, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 17:44, Reply)

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