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Chris Cornell has done a dead.
Who else did an unexpected dead?
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:08, Reply)
Elizabeth Montgomery died this day, back in 1995

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:10, Reply)
when she done that nose twitch thing it made me feel a bit funny
y'know, down there
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
oh god, me too
She had a significant effect on young TH
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:12, Reply)
Arousing, yet not overtly sexual.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:15, Reply)
Kinda like Hitler

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:24, Reply)
Hitler never did that nose twitch thing,
which is kind of a shame in retrospect, as it would have worked well with that silly little moustache of his.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:28, Reply)
Richard got a boner from this
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/01/cf/8f/01cf8fd5f0a7163751f22f0ce2768fda.jpg
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:31, Reply)
I've seen that before, superb
I almost wish I was still putting on club nights so I could use it for a flyer
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:43, Reply)
+and be convicted of a hate crime

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:47, Reply)
My sister wouldn't let that happen m8
Strings would be pulled.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
Yay, police corruption!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:58, Reply)
yesssss

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:07, Reply)
*something about a compass and a cd of Outlandos d'Amour*

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:09, Reply)
Did you just happen to have that picture in your collection
or did you do an image search for "Nazi records"?
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:51, Reply)
I saw it a while back and thought of Ricardo de la beef
now seemed an opportune moment to post it
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:56, Reply)
I've been watching that Man In The High Castle.
The Obergruppenführer has really well behaved kids, so I'm thinking of converting to fascism.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:30, Reply)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unusual_Heat_%28horse%29
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
Surprise, bitch! Unexpected horse.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
Oh, and Ian Brady of course

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
He wanted his ashes to be spread on the moor.
Top trolling, you've got to admit.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:12, Reply)
You say that
But I suspect the media made that up to sell newspapers.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:14, Reply)
^ almost certainly this

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:15, Reply)
Well the coroner has ruled it out apparently.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:17, Reply)
well of course he has

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:18, Reply)
What do you think they should do with them? I think they should hang them.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:19, Reply)
Hanging's too good for his ashes
They should let the victim's families have five minutes alone with them, then they should be burned at the stake
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:20, Reply)
If his ashes come anywhere near my kids I swear I'll do time

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:32, Reply)
You're right, people like Brady don't deserve to die, let alone live.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:34, Reply)
firing squad

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:33, Reply)

www.heart-in-diamond.com/
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:36, Reply)
there's a lot to enjoy by just reading this url, but i urge you to click and see the picture of it
www.cremationsolutions.com/the-loved-one-launcher-ash-scattering-cannon
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:45, Reply)
sold

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:46, Reply)
Man that screams 'dignified, respectful send-off'.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:01, Reply)
It's like a pocket-sized version of what they did with Hunter S. Thompson's ashes.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:10, Reply)
Really? That is some quality trolling.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:14, Reply)
what if he had chosen the same location as Keith Bennett's body and this was his way of finally letting them know?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:16, Reply)
How many people did he do in again?
I often can't even remember where I left my keys the previous night.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:17, Reply)
five dead, i think some got away or they let them go

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:24, Reply)
RealIy? For some reason I thought it was a lot more than that.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:35, Reply)
That's true.
famously not of The Brady Bunch.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:13, Reply)
"And one day, this lady met this fella"
*shudders*
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:14, Reply)
"Drinking German Wiiiiiiine"
www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwLj2K124Mg
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:20, Reply)
ugh

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:22, Reply)
Drummer Man by the Brady Bunch contains a top notch breakbeat
www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ruFc4tcPWs
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:26, Reply)
oh, i actually feel something about that
:(
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:15, Reply)
One that affected me, unexpectedly
was Nancy Reagan. I think it's because she was all over the news when I was a young kid, so seeing pictures of her took me back. Weird.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:19, Reply)

all over the news my first crush
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:22, Reply)
yeah, it's funny what can set you off

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:22, Reply)
Me specifically?
I won't argue there
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:40, Reply)
I get all my celebrity death news from this site.
Sorry to hear about Mr Audioslave.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:17, Reply)
I enjoyed grunge
not his bands particularly, but Imma wear a lumberjack shirt in remembrance
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:21, Reply)

May I start by saying how thrilled we are to have you here. We are such fans of your music and all of your records. I'm not speaking of yours personally, but the whole genre of the rock and roll.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:23, Reply)
i liked soundgarden and temple of the dog
and there were a couple of great singles on the first audioslave album
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:37, Reply)
got youtube links?
I remember them generally existing but nothing comes to mind. I always preferred Alice in Chains.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:39, Reply)
will do when i get back to the office

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:46, Reply)

whole totd album
soundgarden - superunknown
soundgarden - jesus christ pose
audioslave - cochise
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:58, Reply)
Soundgarden?
I prefer Graeme Garden
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)

graeme uphill
+ing
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:13, Reply)
no m8

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:14, Reply)
shut up m8, these days your farts sound like whale noises since your ringpiece has been fucked into a blowhole

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:26, Reply)
i prefer golden grahams

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:22, Reply)
Weren't temple of the dog essentially the grunge version of the travelling wilburys.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:44, Reply)
yeah, sort of

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:46, Reply)
since cornell assembled temple... as a tribute to the guy from motherlovebone
i wonder who's going to collaborate to mourn him
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:06, Reply)
richard digance

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:17, Reply)
jasper carrott

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:27, Reply)
stilgoe

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:27, Reply)
It's the super group we've all been waiting for

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:31, Reply)
i've preordered the album already

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:35, Reply)
i don't know who that is

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:23, Reply)
I really want to believe this is a joke about his Bond song

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:24, Reply)
nope, reading the above replies i'm sure i wouldn't like his music or him

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:26, Reply)
Yeah, you do.
He did that song about wishing he was taller.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:26, Reply)
When I grow up ? From matilda

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:34, Reply)
everyone in my life

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:35, Reply)
Phil Hartman
:(
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:37, Reply)
Andy Dick's fault

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:41, Reply)
Everything is Andy Dick's fault

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:15, Reply)
We'll always have Jingle All The Way.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:42, Reply)
oh man I LOVE 'Instant Replay'!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:44, Reply)
he did a great Bill Clinton impression

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:44, Reply)
Definitely gets marks for 'unexpected'.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:49, Reply)
:(

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:52, Reply)
He was shit, all those cunts were shit, they're all welcome to die if they want

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:54, Reply)
Touch Me I'm Sick by Mudhoney was the only good grunge record
Actually *is* that a grunge record?
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:55, Reply)
Yeah, I'd say so.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:18, Reply)
I hope you're doing the eulogy

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:56, Reply)
alright dribble

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:09, Reply)
please don't bully me online
I have weak constitutions
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)
Get 40 tramadol down you, you'll be right as rain

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:14, Reply)
hahaha yeah drugs, I fucking loves me drugs, ooh me knees are a bit wobbly and I'm going to fall over spazzing out!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:15, Reply)
Is he alright?
I mean...I know he's not alright, but still.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:27, Reply)
I hope so, poor lad's out of his depth

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:29, Reply)
Is he actually alone?
It's difficult to know how much of it is genuine psychosis, and how much is just for attention.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:41, Reply)
he died two hours ago

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:46, Reply)
I think so, yes

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:46, Reply)
It's just a waki online persona to troll us all and make us upset

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:33, Reply)
I'm worried about his kid's broken elbow though
cos my boss's kid broke her hand yesterday and I'd hate to think spanf's kid is already a violent rapist.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:39, Reply)
i doubt he even has a kid

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:49, Reply)
I hope you're doing the bartman

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:57, Reply)
well I *do* have a rep for being rude

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:11, Reply)
Your tombstone's going to say "Fuck Off, You Bunch Of Shitcunts."

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:59, Reply)

"Fuck Off, You Bunch Of Shitcunts." "Reunited with Hitler at last"
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:11, Reply)
Richard, yesterday:
68.media.tumblr.com/6b6060c4538890f928dc8d3e33f429e2/tumblr_nef06axUBt1teand3o1_500.png
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:00, Reply)
well i for one am shocked
/ac
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:07, Reply)
I get so disappointed by things that are shit
It's just not necessary
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:10, Reply)
I hope I'm doing the macarena

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:08, Reply)
^ fucked two blokes while his missus was away

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:09, Reply)
Ay!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:11, Reply)
Oh for fuck's sake.
How do I center something in word but preserve left-alignment as well.

So I want some left-aligned text in the middle of the page, you know, like how you do by hand on an envelope?

I should able to google this but I can't think of the correct term.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:22, Reply)
You have to do it by eye, I think.
Just TAB the bastard into place.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:24, Reply)
Seriously? Fucking hell.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:24, Reply)
Or put it in a text box, maybe.
Word is famous for being shit at formatting though, so don't hold your hopes up.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:28, Reply)
Yeah
famed by wankers you only use it to make clipart-infested LOST DOG posters.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:34, Reply)
All the BA's write 100+ page specs in word.
No wonder they never seem very happy.

To truly appreciate how shit word is though you need to have used it in a corporate environment with a custom corporate layout that was created 20 years ago by someone who didn't really know what they were doing and has been updated and hacked away at through the several re-brands and mergers the company has been through.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:41, Reply)
my entire job is being given those docs by a new Project Manager
with the single email line: Can you do something about this?
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 12:18, Reply)
lol, gutted.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 12:24, Reply)
mash your cock into the USB port

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:29, Reply)
Enable rulers
Drag the Page return marker to the desired point and start typing
OR right-click to create a new tab stop, then add a tab to move the cursor to the tab stop then start typing
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:29, Reply)
So what you're telling me it's easier to do this in html than it is in a word processor.
Christ word really is shit isn't it?
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:40, Reply)
centre ffs

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:30, Reply)
I think you'll find it's 'centaur'

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:40, Reply)
morning

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:19, Reply)
Hello there.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:20, Reply)
well met, mm

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:30, Reply)
Morning.
Seems you've upset the Spanf
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:22, Reply)
How can you tell? He seems permanently upset

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:23, Reply)
Yeah, that's true I suppose.
I guess what I mean is that the upset seems to be directed at Grr. And for some reason drimble and $$
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:28, Reply)
using my powers of autism
all the words he angrily typed start with keyboard letters under the left hand. So I reckon he was having a wank while looking at this place, then he furiously bashed the keyboard with his free hand at the happy point and autocorrect did the rest.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:33, Reply)
Uh, no.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:42, Reply)
oh shit yeah, H is a right hand letter
someone else'll have to explain it then
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:43, Reply)
Maybe, and it's a long shot, he's just a knob

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:46, Reply)
trying to think of someone here who isn't a knob
maybe vlad
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:56, Reply)
no posts in a week
:(
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:22, Reply)
Having watched someone speedrun Typing of the Dead one handed
It's definitely possible
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:46, Reply)
the first line of your post
is the most tragic thing I've read on here in quite a while
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:48, Reply)
Having grown up in the digital age and being raised on thumbnail gallery pornography, I learned to masturbate with my left hand, so I could continue browsing with my right.
Didn't think about that did you Poirot?
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:08, Reply)
I've upset many people on here, he's just another name on a long list

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:30, Reply)
No ur upset

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:46, Reply)
I'm really upset that no one at the pub bought me a pint yesterday.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:00, Reply)
Poor form that , what's the point in having a world facilities management day eh

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:10, Reply)
I told Danny on the bar and he said "you can't just make shit up to get a free beer"
And I said he gave Jo a pint on women's day and that's no different and then a woman at the bar frowned at me.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:57, Reply)
I was in the pub once, and this old boy kept taking a sip, then asking the barmaid to top it up
I asked her how I get free beer, and she said "come in at opening time every day, and stay until closing"

I did not lol.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:58, Reply)
hold on, what pub is this? sounds like a good deal

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:00, Reply)
Well, I say 'pub'
It was the wetherspoons in north end
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:05, Reply)
Alcololism.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:01, Reply)
He sounds like he's got that all worked out.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:01, Reply)
This is fine with me.
What's not fine is being being a courdroy wearing real ale twat who asks for a taste of nearly everything on tap while a line forms behind them then finally orders a half of the first thing they tried.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:10, Reply)
print this off and shove it in his fucking face
globalfm.org/events/world-fm-day-2017/
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:59, Reply)
He's a knob is Danny.
He refused to serve me once because I was too drunk.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:01, Reply)
they need to move with the times and start celebrating world DAB day instead

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:06, Reply)
exactly

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:09, Reply)
what, like that stupid dance move?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:15, Reply)
Nah the fish

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:16, Reply)
oh, phew

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:22, Reply)
he's well excited for dab day
kayakfishinguk.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/p1040596_02.jpg
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:28, Reply)
i *think* i caught a couple of those, back in't day

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:30, Reply)
Good morning mr grrrpie, how's your lady wife today?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:22, Reply)
she's got a new job, all's well in the Polish Enclave

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:31, Reply)
Hail and salutations on this fine Thursday morn

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:24, Reply)
named after Thor, some wanker in a comic book

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:31, Reply)
I move that it be renamed as DrDonBlakesDay.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:47, Reply)
That poor boy

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:46, Reply)
fuck off Elvis

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:47, Reply)
Well I did just do a shit so big that it felt like I would die

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:50, Reply)
at least being anally raped won't feel so bad in comparison

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:54, Reply)
Wait, is that likely to happen??
I don't like the sound of that
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:55, Reply)
he must no something you don't
quick! encase your rear end in a block of concrete
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:15, Reply)
H'i

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:03, Reply)
fuck off back to a star trek convention you fucking Klingon

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:08, Reply)
ok, bye

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:26, Reply)
no wait

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:33, Reply)
yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:08, Reply)
+hoooooooooooo, the board's biggest bent is back

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:11, Reply)
don't ruin another International Museum Day for me

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:15, Reply)
I wouldn't dare
I expect you're going to look at all those Greek urns of blokes bumming each other
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:19, Reply)
Yes, bwana.
Has there been another meltdown? This place is getting meltier than a Subway during the lunchtime rush.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:12, Reply)
just spanf
he's like the new gonz; an incomprehensible shutin dosed up to manage his failing body in a desperate attempt to prolong his worthless existence.

Maybe all spanf needs is a dog and a facebook account.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:14, Reply)
Poor thing.
It must be hard putting a brave face on things when your body's basically giving up on you, for no good reason other than that you relentlessly battered it into submission with alcohol and drugs.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:19, Reply)
over on one of my car forums was a teenage prick
one of those twats that buys a car just to slam it to the ground and add a stupid stereo to it. Bought car, drank, smashed car. Fixed it, did drugs, smashed it again. Fixed it a third time, did drugs, then developed some weird syndrome where your eyes see the static on an untuned TV if you take a single toke or finish your first pint. Only 20, now he's got to be straight edge for life. No sympathy.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:24, Reply)
Sounds like a very effective natural defence mechanism.
It's good to know the body does sometimes step in to prevent you destroying it completely.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:39, Reply)
At least it'll eventually bring his insurance premiums down.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:46, Reply)
+ and they're like, it's better than yours

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:56, Reply)
foood?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:31, Reply)
Phwooooooooooar check out the Thursday on that

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:13, Reply)
Thursday is Thiccday

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:16, Reply)
how very strange
www.hodinkee.com/articles/white-gold-submariner-world-record-christies
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:37, Reply)
that pic with the misaligned bezel is doing my head in

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:45, Reply)
maybe that's when their parking runs out, its handy for that

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:50, Reply)
I worked with a supernerd
who set up a webcam onto the street below, which could detect the hi-viz jackets that traffic wardens wear here. If it detected one, it automatically bought a 1-hour parking ticket for his car parked down the road.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:55, Reply)
That's quality nerding.
I did make some enquiries about installing a webcam outside my house but apparently it's illegal in France to film the public highway on an ongoing basis.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:15, Reply)
Continuous video surveillance is a proud, British tradition.
Don't let then oppress you.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:19, Reply)
I might hide the camera in a gnome or something.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:33, Reply)
"nipple dial"

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:49, Reply)
yes it is, well spotted

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:50, Reply)
Spotted nipple?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:59, Reply)
Depends on the lume

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:12, Reply)

cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0250/6646/products/Askme06_grande.png?v=1488350339
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:22, Reply)
This connection is not secure.
Logins entered here could be compromised.
Learn more.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:38, Reply)
I hope the third line is just general life advice

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:43, Reply)
I wish to learn more.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:44, Reply)

you
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:26, Reply)
+are the sunshine of my life

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:28, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7891087
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:32, Reply)
As good today as it was then.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:37, Reply)
Also, this didn't get the recognition it deserved:
www.b3ta.com/talk/7891114
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:45, Reply)
woah
You'll be shocked to hear that I don't remember doing that
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:53, Reply)
You won't mind if I claim the credit for it, then?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:01, Reply)
not at all

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:09, Reply)
This made for an enjoyable read.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:55, Reply)
^auntie meridiem

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:44, Reply)
Jambo

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:51, Reply)
alright ma8e!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:58, Reply)
Hahahah yeah!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:06, Reply)
we have a right laugh here, eh?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:21, Reply)
We sure do, I love you guys

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:23, Reply)
group hug!

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:24, Reply)
still waiting, guys
my arms are getting tired
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:47, Reply)
*offers hand*

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:48, Reply)
The "manolith & Two Hats Club" needs to broaden its membership.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:49, Reply)
But we'd need to change the sign

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:50, Reply)
You are Hobbes to manolith's Calvin.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:12, Reply)
^ that uncle no-one wants to invite

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:53, Reply)
I had an uncle who once said "if you weren't my niece" to one of my cousins
He was given a wide berth after that
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:57, Reply)
You never told us Donald Trump was your uncle.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:01, Reply)
It's not something I'm proud of, m8

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:05, Reply)
Wait, what was he going to say?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:06, Reply)
I'm sure it was something like
"I would treat you as well as I do my own daughter, because I care so much about your well-being and future endeavours"
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:07, Reply)
No, I don't think so, I get the impression some of your family could end up with Mr Jeremy Kyle esq,

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:13, Reply)
haha, oh m8
You have no idea.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:14, Reply)
The saving grace for me, is that these people are not blood relatives of mine
All from the step-dad's side.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:22, Reply)
those two little ones that live in your house though
*taps side of head*
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:23, Reply)
If they weren't his sons ...

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:25, Reply)


(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:30, Reply)
... then you would not need to take responsibility for their well-being, or put up with their constant annoying and needy behaviour

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:35, Reply)
good save

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:35, Reply)
Look at this, it's well good
www.youtube.com/watch?v=6g95E4VSfj0
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:37, Reply)
i looked at this
and it was well good
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:48, Reply)
makes you proud to be a merican

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:55, Reply)

no-one wants to invite fester
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 8:57, Reply)

37.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc3qd7vrLY1rdutw3o1_500.gif
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:24, Reply)
Garfunkel's getting on a bit :(

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:26, Reply)
i didn't know garfield even HAD an uncle

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:48, Reply)
This is like that gypsum thread ting we had yesterday.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:51, Reply)
Fucking shit fucking day fuck it
Cuntfuckbollocksshite
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:37, Reply)
what's up, love?

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:38, Reply)
someone at the office is wearing the same shirt

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:42, Reply)
& wakki tie

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:48, Reply)
Treat yourself to a cake to cheer yourself up.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:41, Reply)
Leaky roof
Last night, during a heavy downpour, water started running dripping from the pull-cord lightswitch in the bathroom.

I'm in a protracted dispute with the building company so I have no idea how I'm going to sort this - most likely flashing around a boiler flue.

I've also misplaced my lanyard at work that has office key, swipe card and locker key so I'm dressed in biker leathers at work looking like a fucking gimp.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:50, Reply)
Ugh
This sounds like a case of "one of those days"
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:52, Reply)
Managed to get master keys to lockers
so at least I don't look like a courier any longer.

There's more rain forecast for Friday, it's going to leak again and I have no idea what to do. The building company and I are speaking through conciliation in a trade guild.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:58, Reply)
errr you had a plan, remember?
b3ta.com/talk/8057481
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:02, Reply)
He should hire you as project manager.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:05, Reply)
It was a good plan

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:05, Reply)
It was a beautiful plan
a big, beautiful plan. But insurance doesn't cover roofs, I found out last night when I called Bradford & Bingley's emergency cover line.

Still, I've involved the trade body. If the builders refuse to take responsibility I can put a complaint in against them and I understand the consumer goods act 2015 covers this kind of situation comprehenisvely.

Just such unnecessary hassle...
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:30, Reply)
Yes, yes - you're right.
If it had been a leaky shower I'd have been fine, but a fault in the roof is beyond my scheme.
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:31, Reply)
work it, gurlfriend

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 9:57, Reply)
Yong man, there's no need to feel down

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 11:32, Reply)
"You know, Soundgarden"
"Like Spin that Black Circle?"
"No, that is Pearl Jam"
"Oh, like Alive?"
"Again, Pearl Jam"
"Look, he did that Bond theme"
"Oh yeah"
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:00, Reply)
^spoonman

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:03, Reply)
CLASSIC 'GARDEN

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:08, Reply)
that was a good Pearl Jam album

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:09, Reply)
Here's me agreeing with grry about something.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
smeg

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 2:22, Reply)
Fuck off Dave
There's a big wobbly ah fuck it
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 2:31, Reply)
Ginger Fucknut Glory Hunting Wanker Grrmcachine
Sex with a child
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 0:29, Reply)
4 threads in a row, you are spoiling us

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 0:39, Reply)
Alright dribble.
I will get banned for this kind of behaviour.

Apparently someone is going to "find me and stab me and then rip my head off"

I have pointed out that "finding me" should be quite easy considering I have sent him my post code and numerical house identification.

I have also tried to point out that I have also furnished the aggressor with my mobile phone number and repeatedly requested his Attendance at my abode.

It seems that wanking into his own sock and threatening me is what he gets off on
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 0:52, Reply)

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-20777002
(, Thu 18 May 2017, 1:08, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 1:10, Reply)
shit, wrong account

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 1:21, Reply)
Greg Duffy

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 2:00, Reply)
he's a threadstarter, twisted threadstarter

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 7:19, Reply)
John Spartan

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:16, Reply)
Hello

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:20, Reply)
shit, wrong account

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:42, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:55, Reply)
that's better

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:59, Reply)
It seems members of the forum presume you are dribble

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 23:19, Reply)
ITS FUCKING DRIBBLE ITS SELF
I know humans watch ITv but you exist. The horrific competition between you an complete shite must be fucking depressing
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 22:48, Reply)
What

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 23:49, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 2:32, Reply)
Broken chatbot is broken.

(, Thu 18 May 2017, 0:04, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 23:19, Reply)
Simon Pheonix

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:40, Reply)
River Phoenix

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:53, Reply)
Too soon

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:00, Reply)
Wakeeñ Feenix

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:16, Reply)
I ain't never seen so much Joaquin off.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:28, Reply)
Beyond the Valley of the 'dols

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:32, Reply)
Tramalangadingdong

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:32, Reply)
The Tramned

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:33, Reply)
The New York 'dols

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:33, Reply)
Tramuel Taylor Coleridge

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:34, Reply)
Tram the Sham and the Pharaohs

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:35, Reply)
^Bully

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:51, Reply)
Living 'dol

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:35, Reply)
Supertram

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:36, Reply)
Roger 'doltrey

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:36, Reply)
Trameron Diaz

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:36, Reply)
trammy davis junior

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:37, Reply)
Julius Seizure

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:39, Reply)
Spazzy Jeff

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:44, Reply)
I Siezure raise
And fold
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:44, Reply)
Fitz from cracker

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:45, Reply)
Suck my bell and me

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:45, Reply)
nice thread

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:51, Reply)
shove it up your arse and fart it out of your cunt

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:02, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:15, Reply)
Jerk About, by Seizure's Palace

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 21:07, Reply)
London is fucking shite

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:06, Reply)
yes, one of the world's megacities with a 2000-year history
is a shithole compared to whatever chav-infested dosshouse you grew up in.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:10, Reply)
Probably Coventry.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:11, Reply)
I'm thinking Chelmsford

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:15, Reply)
Oof, way harsh, bro. :(

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:49, Reply)
I love going there for a visit.
Living there is a big no, though.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:13, Reply)
It's great
I love dicking around the Science or History museum if I have time to kill
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:21, Reply)
^ stuck his knob in a dinosaur skeleton

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:24, Reply)
yeah, once

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:32, Reply)
no m8 it's fucking shite, can't you read

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:28, Reply)
oh

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:32, Reply)
Lazy strikethrough

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:51, Reply)
no wonder no-one wants to live there

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:27, Reply)
true
can't get enough people to move there
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:32, Reply)
that's right, dribble m8

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:52, Reply)
Brilliant

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:37, Reply)
I send my Greek landlord £350 million a week, let's take back our 1 bed cellar conversions

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:45, Reply)
London is fine,
it's Londoners that are the problem.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:40, Reply)
I'm not racist but the appalling Barbara Windsor eh, just saying

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:46, Reply)
given the large proportion of foreigners in London, basically you are confirming once again your place as #1 forum racist

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:54, Reply)
and that's coming from the Nazi sympathiser!

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:55, Reply)
He's taken my baton of intolerance and sprinted off into the sunset like a gazelle

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:57, Reply)
My little boy has broken his elbow

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:58, Reply)
youthemism

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:09, Reply)
in b4 fred, carol and gaz

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:13, Reply)
they taught me HOW to put on a duvet cover...
Terrible racists though, making a mockery of the Natives.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:26, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:39, Reply)

given the large proportion of foreigners in London, basically you are confirming once again your place as monster munch phooey,
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:14, Reply)
Alright dribble

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:56, Reply)
It's gay and full of cunts but they seem happy, I just leave them to it.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:45, Reply)
Can you fix me?
If I take tramadol I have a seizure where I spaz out and wake up some time later.

With no knowledge of what's happened and usually bleeding from my head or bruised to fuck.

Thanks
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:51, Reply)
Yeah stop taking tramadol, it's nasty shit.
Is it all opiates you get that with? 30mg codeine or dihydrocodeine might work just as well for pain. If you need something stronger then oramorph.
Assuming you're taking max ibuprofen and paracetamol already.
Maybe add in amitriptyline depening on the type of pain and if it keeps you awake.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:00, Reply)
I dodge the codeine if I can
Stick to the 30/40 tramadol in a 3/4 hour period.

Seems to take the edge off. But causes seizures.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:39, Reply)
Stop taking tramadol

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:21, Reply)
^what they said^
Some people can knock back tramadol with no problem, others have seriously unpleasant adverse effects with it. You're clearly one of the latter, and persevering with it won't change that.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:34, Reply)
I take like 30/40 at a time
Is that bad?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:38, Reply)
Isn't that engine lubricant?
Are you on castrol?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:51, Reply)
I'm afraid I don't understand this.
I can't help but suspect that that might have been your intention. Either that, or you're off your tits on tramadol.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:59, Reply)
Unless you're opening up the 50mg capsules and snorting 60-80% of the contents,
in which case that might explain why you're having seizures.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:01, Reply)
Maybe it's like that Jam sketch, where if you take just the right amount of far too much tramadol it provides a pleasant mild analgesic effect

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:12, Reply)
I get issued 100 50mg tabs
A month.

I eat 30/40/50 in about 4 hours.

Spaz out. Feel great. Dress the wounds. Recover. Repeat.

Wankers
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:47, Reply)
Well if that's what you were told to take then it means your doctor doesn't like you very much

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:18, Reply)
No you don't m8

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 20:30, Reply)
Disagree

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 19:22, Reply)
WOAH
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FVVVIIIIIVIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIII*IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFVVFNNNNNFFVVIIII**II***I*II*I*II**I*IIIIIIIIIVIIVVVVVVFFFFFFFNNNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFFVVVFVVVIVVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIVVIIIVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
FVVVVIIVVIVIIIIIIIIVVIVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVFNNFNNNNFVVVIII******I*II***II***III*IIIIIIIIVIVVVVVVVVVVVFFFNNNMMNNMNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNFFFFVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIVVIIIIVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIVIIIIIIIIIIIII
FVFVVVVVVVVVIIVIIIIVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIII*III*IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**II*IIIVFVNNNNNNNFFVVIIII**II*I****I********I**IIIIIIIIIIVIIVVVIVVVVVFFFNNNMNMNMMMMMMMNMMMMMMMMMMMFFVFFFVVFVFFFVVVVVVVIIVVVIIVIVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIIVIIIIII*IIIIVI
FFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIVIIVIIVIIIII*I*IIIIIII*III*IIIIII*I**IIIIIVVVFNNNNNNNFVVVIII*II*I*II***********I**IIIIIIIIIIIIIVIIIIVVVVVFFFNNNNMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVVVVVVVVVVVVIVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIVIIIIIIIIIIVVI
FVFVVVVVVVVFVFFFVVVVVVVVVFVVVVIVVVIIIVVIVVVVVVVVVVI*IIIII*II*III**III*IIII*I*IIIIVVFNNNNNNNNFVVVIIII**I*II**********I*I*IIIIIVIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVFFNNNNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFVVVVVVVFVVVVVFVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVIIVIIIVVVFV
FNFFVVVVVVFFFFFVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIVVVIIIIII**II*I*III**II**IIIVVFFFNNNNNNNFFVIIIIIIIIIII*III*I****IIIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNMMNMMMMMNMMMMMMMMMMNFFFFFNFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFVVVIVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII*IIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVIIVVVIVVVVVV
NNNFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVII*III*III*I*I*IIIIIIFVFFFFNNNNNNNVVIIIVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIVVFFFFFFFVVFFFFVVVFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNMMNNNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMMMFNNFNFFFFFFFFVVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**IIIIIIIIIVVVVVVIIVVVVVVVVVV
NNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVFFVVVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVVVVFVFVVVFFVFFVVVVVVVI*IIIIIII***IIIIIIVFFFFNFNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFVVFFFFVIIIIIIVVFFFFFFFFVIIIVVVFNNNNNNNNNFFFFNNNNNMMNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNMMFNNNFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFVVVVVVVFFVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII**IIIIIIIIVIIIVIVVVVVIIVVVVV
NNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVFFFFVVVVVVVFVFFVFVFFFFFFFFFFFVFVVVVVVVVVIIII***II**IIIIIIVFFFFFFNNNNNNNFFFFVVVFFFFFFVVFVIIIIIVVFFFFFVVVFFFNNNNFFFFFNNNNFFFFFFFNNNNMMNNNMNMNMMMMMMMMNMMNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVFFFFFFVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII*IIIIIIIIIIVVVIVVVVVIIIIVVVVI
NNNNNFFFFFFFFFVFFVVVFFFVVVVVVFVVVFFFFVVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVVFVIII**IIIII*IIIIIVVVFFNNNNNNFNNNFFFFFFVVVFNNFFFVVIIIIIVFFFFVFVVIIIFFNFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVFFFNNNNMNNMNNMMMNMMMMMMMMMMNNNFFFNNFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFFFFFFVFFVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIVIVVVVIVIIIIVVVVV
NNNFFFFFFFFFFVFFFVVFFFFVFVVVFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVVVVFFFVIIIIIIIIVVFIVIVIIVIVFFNNNNNNNNNFVIIVVIIIIIIIVVIIVI**IIVVFVVVIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVIVIIIIVVFFFFNNNMMMNNMMMMMMNMMMNNMMMMMMFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVIVVVVVVIIIVVVVVI
NNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFVVVFFFVVVVVFFFFFVFFVVVFVFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVFFVIVIIIIVVVFVFFVVVIVVVVFFNNNNNNNNNFVVVVIVIVVVFFVVIIII**IIVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIVVVFFFNNMMMNMMMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFFFNNFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIVIIVVVVVVVVIIIVIVVVI
NNNFNNFFFFFFFVVFVVFVFFVFVVVVFFFFFFFFFFVVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFFVFVVVVVFFVFVFFFFVVVNFFFNNNNNNNNNFVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII*IIIVVVVVVIIIIIIIIII**IIIIIIIIVVVVFFNNNNNMMMMNNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNNNNNFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIVVVVVVVVVIIVVVVVV
NNNNNFFFVFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFVFFFVFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFVFFFVFFFFFVVNFFFFNNNNNNNNNFVIIII*II*******IIIIIIIIVVVVIII*********I*IIIIIIVVVVFFFNNNMNMMNMMMNMMNMNMMMMMMMNMMMNNFFNFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVIIIVVVVVVVV
NFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFVFFFNFFFNNNMMNNNFVVIIIII*III*IIIIII**IIVIVVIIII***I****IIIIIIIIIVVVVFFFNNNMMMNMMMMMMMNMMMMMMMMMMNMMMFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVI
NNFFFFVVVFVFVFVVVFFFFVVVVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNVVIIIII*I**IIIIII***IIVVVVIIIIIII*II**II*IIIIVVVVVFFFNNNNMNMNMMMNNNMMMNMMMNMMNMNNMMFFVVFFVNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVVVVVVIVVIIIIIIVVIVIIIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
NNFFFVFFFNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFNFNFFNFFFFFFNFFFNNFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNFVIII*****IIIIIII**IIIIVVVVIIIIIIII**IIIIIIIIVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNMNMNMMNNNMMMNMMMMNNNMMMNFFVVFFFVVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIVIIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
FNFFFFFNFNNNNFFFFFFFNFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNFNFNFNFFNFNNFFFNNFNFFNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNFVVIIIII*IIIIIIII****VVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVFFFFFNNNNMMMNMMNNMNNMNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIVVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFF
NFNFFFFFFNNNFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNFVVIII*IIIIIIII***IIVVVIVVVII*IIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVFFFFFNNNNMMNMMMMNNNNMNMNMNMMMMMMNMNMMFNNNNNFFFNNFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVFVVVVVVVVVVVFVVFFFVVFVFFFFFFVVVFVVFFFFFFFFFF
FFNFFFFFNFFNNNNFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVIIIIIIIIVVIIIIIVVFFFFFFFIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNNMNNNNMMMNNNMMMMNMMNMMNMMNNNNNNNFNNNNNFNNFFNFFFFFFFFNFFFNFFFFFFVVVFFFFFFFFVFVFFVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
NNFFFFNFNFNNFNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNMMNFFVVIIIIIIIIIFVVVFFFNNNFNFFIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNMMNNMMNMMNNMNMMNNNNMMMMNMNNNMNNNNNNFFNNNFNFNNFNFFFFNNNFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFVFVFFFVVVFVFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFF
FNNFFFFNNNNNFNNNFNFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNNNNNNFFVVVVVVIIIII*IVFFNFNNFFFFVIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNNNMMMNMNMMNNMMMMMNMMMMMNMMNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNFNNFFNFNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFVV
NNFFNNNNNFNFNNNFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFNFNNNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVVVVIIIIIIIIVFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNMNNMMMMNMMMNNNMNMMMMMNMNNNNNFNFFNNNFFFFNFFNFNFFFFNFFFFNNFFFFFNFFFNFFFFNNFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFV
NNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFNFFFFNNFFNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNNMMMNNMMMMMMMMNMNMMMMMMMNMNMNNNNFFNNNNFFFNFNFNNFFFNNNFNFNNFNNFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFVFFFVF
NNNNNNNFNNNFNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVVIVVFFFFFVVVVFFFFFFFFFNFVIIIIIVVVVVVFFFFFFFNNNNNNNMMMMMMNNNNMNMMMMMMMMMMNMMMMMNFFFNFNNNNNNFNFFFFFFFFFNNFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFNFFNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFVF
NNNFNNFFNFFFNNFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNFFNFFFFNFFFNNNFFNNFFNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVIIIII*IIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIVVVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNMNMMMNNNNNNMNMMMMMMNMNNNMNNNNFFNFNNFFFNNNNFFFFNFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVF
NFNNNNFFNFNNNFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFNNNNNNNNFNNFFFNFFFNFFFFFNFFFNFFFFFFNFNFNNNFNNNNNNNNMMNNFFVVVVIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNMNNMMMMMNMNNNNMMMMMMMMNNMNMNNNNNNFFNFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVV
NNNNNNNFNNNNNFFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFNFFNFFNFFFFFFNNNNFNNFNNFFNNFFFNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFNNFNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNMNFFVVVVIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNMNMNMNNMMMNMMMNMMMMMMMMNMMMNNNNNFFFFFNNFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNVNNFFFFNNFFFFFFFFNFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVFVF
NNNNNNNNNNNFNNFNFNFNFFFFFNFNFFNNFFNNNFFNFNNNFFFFFNFFFNNNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNMNMMMMMMMMNMMMNMMMMMMMMMNMNMNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNFFFNFFFFFFNFFNFNNFFFFFFFFNNFNFFNNFNNFFNFFFFFFNFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFF
NNNFNNNNFNNFFNFNVNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFNNNFFFFFFNFFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNFVIII**I****IIVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNMMMNMMNNNMNMMMMNMMNMMMMMNMNNMFNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNFNNFFFFFFVFFVVVVFFFNFFFFFFFFFFF
NNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNFNNNFNFNNFFFFFFFFFNNNFFFNNNFFNFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVNNNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNFIIIII**IIIIVVVVVVVFFFFFFFNFNNFNNNNNNNNMNMMNNMNMMNMNNNMNMMNMMMMNNNNNNNNNNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFF
NNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNFNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFNNFFFFFFNNFFFNFNNNNNNFFFNFFNNFFFFNFFFNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNNNNNFFVIIIIIVVVVVVVFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNMNNMMMMNNMMMNNNNMNMMMMNMNNMMNNNNNNFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
NNNNNNNNNNNFNFNNFNFNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFNFFFNNNFNFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNMMNNNNMNNNFNFFVVVFFFFFFFFFFNNNNFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNMMMNMNNNMMMMNMMMMNMNNNNNNNFFFFFFFNFFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
NNNNNNNNNFNFNNNNFNNFNFNNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNFNFNNNFFNFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVFFNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNNMMMMMMMMNMNNNNNNNNFNFNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNMMMNMNMMMMMMMMMMMNMMNNMNFFFFNFNNNFNFFFFNVFFFNFNFFFFFNFNFNFNNFFFFNFFFFNNFFFFFFFFVVVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
NNNNNNNNNNNNNFNFFNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFNNFNFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFVVVFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNMMMMMNNMMMNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMMMMMMNMNMMMMMMMMMNMMMNMNNNNNNNNNFFNFNNFFNFNNFFFNFFFFNFNFNFNFFFFNFFNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFN
NNNNNNNNNNNNFNFFNNNNNNFNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVFVFFVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVVFVVVVVVNNNNNNNMNNMNNMMMNMMNNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNFNFNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMMMNNNMMMNMMMNMNMMMMNMNMNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFNNFFNNNFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFNFFN
NNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNFNFFFNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVFFVVFFVFFNFNNNMNNFNNNNMNNNNMNNNMNMNNNNNNNNNFVFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNMMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMNMMMMNNMNNFNFNFFFFFFFFFNFNFFNFFNFFFFNNNFNFNNNNFNFNNNFNFFFNFNNFFNFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFN
NNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFNNNNNNFFFVFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFVVFFVVVVVVVFVVVVVVVFFVVVVVFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNMNMMNNNNNNMNNNNNNVVVVFFFFFFFFNFNNFNNNFFNFNFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNMNMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMNMMNMMNNNNFNFFFFFFNNFFFFFNFNFNFFNFFFFNFFFFFFFFFNFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVVFFF
NNNNNFNNNNNNNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFVFFFVFFFVVFFVVVVVFVFVFVVVVVVVFFFVVFFFFFFNNNNNNNNMNNNNMNNMMNNNMNNNNNNNNNNVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFNNNNNNNNMMMMMNMMMMMNMMMMMMNMNNNNNFFFNNFFFFVVFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVVVFFF
NNNNNNNNNNFNNNFNNFNNNNNNNFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFVFFVFFFFFFFFVVVFFFFVVFFFFVVFFFFFVFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNMNMNFNNNNNNNNNNNFVVVIVVVVFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNMMMNNMMMMMNMMMNMMMMMMMMMMNNNFFFFFFFVVFFFFFFFFVVFFFFVFFVVVFFFFVVFFVFVFVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFVFFFFVVFFFV
NNNNNNNFNFNNFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFVVVFFFFFFVVVFFVFVVVVVFFFFFNFFFFNNNNNNNMNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNVVIIVVVVVVVVFFFVFFVFFVVVVVVVFVVVFFFFNNNNNNNNNMMMMNNNMMNNNNNNMMMMMMMNNNNNFNNFFFFNFNNFFFFFFFFVVVFVVFFFFFVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFFFFVFVFFFFFFFFFVFFVFV
NNNNFNFNFFNFFFFNFFFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVFFFNFFNFNFFFFFNNFNFFVVVVFFFFFVFFFFFFVFVVFFNFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFVVVVIVIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFVFFFFNNNNNNNNMNNNNNMMNNNNMMMMMNMMNMNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFVVFFFVFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVFVFFFFVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFF
NNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVFFFVFFFFFFFNFFNNFFFFFFNNFFFFFVFFFFNFFFFNNNNFNNNNNNMNNNNNNMMNNMMNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFVVVVVVIIIIIVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIVVVVFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNMMMMMMMNMNNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFNNFNNNNNNNFFFVVVVVVVVFFVVFFFFFFVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFF
FNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVVFFFFFFNNFFNFFFFFFNNNNNNNFFFFNFNNNFFNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNMNNNMMNNMMMNNNNNNNNNNNFFVVVVVVVVIIVIIIIIIIIIVIVVIIIIIVVIVVIIVVVVFFFNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNMMNMMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFNNNNFNNNNNFFFFVVVVVVVFVFFFFFFVFVVFFVFFFFFVFFFFFFFFF
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFNFFFFFNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNMMNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIIIIIIIIVIVVFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNMMNNNNMMNNMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFVVVVVFVFFFFVFFFVVVVFVFFFFFFFFVFVVFFF
NFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFVVVFFFVFFFFFFFNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNMNMMNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNVVVVVVIIII****IIII*IIIIIIIIVIIIIIIIIIIIIVIIIIIVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFVFVVVVVVVFFFFFVFFFVVVFFVFFFFFFFFFVFVFFF
FFFFFFFFFNFFFFVFFVFFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFNNNFNNFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNFNNNNNNNMNMNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNFFVVVVVIVIIIIIII*II*IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVIVFFFNNNNNNNNFFNNNNNNNNNNNMNMNNMMMNNMNFNFFFFFFFVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIVVIIVVFFFFFFVFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFF
FFFFFFNFFFFNFFFFFFFNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFNNNNFFFNFFFFNFNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNFFNNNNNNNNNMNNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNFFVVVVIIIIIIIIII**III*IIIIIII*II**I***I**III*IIIIIIVVVVFFFNNNNNNNNNFFFNNFNNNNNNMNNNMNMNMNNNMNNNNFNNNNNFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFVFFFVFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVFF
NFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNFNFNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVNNNNNNNNNFNFNNNNNNNFFNNNNNNNMNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFVVVIIIIII*****I*I********III*******I***I*II*I*IIIIIVIVVFNNNNNNNFFFFFNFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNMNNMNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFVIIVVVVVVVVFFVVVVFFFVVFFFVFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFV
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNFNFNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFFFFVFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNFNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNMMMNNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNVVIIIII*I***I**************I**I***I*******III*IIIIIIIIIVFFNFFNFNNNNNFNNNNNNNMMNNNNNNNMNMNNNNNNMNMNNNNNNNNFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFVFVFFVVFVFFFVVVVVFVVVFVFFFFFVFFV
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFNFNNNNNNNNNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNMMMNNNNNNNNFFNFFVIIII*III********************I*I************I*I*IIIIIVVVVVNFFFFNNFNNFFNNNNNNMMNNNNNNMNNNNNNNMNNNMMMNNFNFFFFFVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVIVVVVVVVFVFFFFFFFF
NFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFNFFFFFNNFNFNNFFFNNNFFNNFNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNMNNNNMNNNNNNFNFVVIII***I*****************I**I************III****IIIIIIIVVVFFNNFFNNNNFNNNNMNNMMNNMNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNFFFFFFFVVFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFVVVVVVVVFFFVFFVFFFFFFFF
FNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFNFFFVVFFVFVFVFFFFVVVFFFFFFNNFFFNFNNNNFFFNNNNNNFNNNFNNNMMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNNFFFVV*I*I*****************************************I*IIIIIIIFVFFNNFFNNNNFFFFNNNNNMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNFFFNFFFVFVVFFFFVVIVFFFVVVVVIVVFVVVVFFVVVVFFFFVFFVV
NFFFFFFFNFFFFFNFFFFFFFNFFFFVVVFFVVVFFFFFVVFFFFFFFFFFFNNFNNFNFFFFFNNFNNNNNFNMMMMNNMNNNNNNNNNNFFVFFIIII***************************I************II*IIIIIIIIVVVFFNNNNNNNNFNFNNNNMNMMNMNNNNNFFFFNFNFFNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFVFFFFVVVVVVVVVFFFFFVVFVVFVVVFVVVVVVVVFFVFFFFFF
FFNFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFNNFFFFFVVVVVVFVVFVVFVFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFNNFNNNNMMMMMMMMNNNNNNFFFFFFFFVIVII**************************************I**I*I*IIIIIVIVFFFFFNNFFNNNNFFFNNMMNNNNNNNFFFFFNFNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNNNMNNFFFFFVVVVVVVVVIVVVVVVVVVVVVVIVIIIVVVIVVVVVVFFFFFF
NNFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFNNNFFFFVVFFFVVVVVVVFVVVFFFFFFVFFFFNFFFFFFFFNNNFNNNMMMNMMMMNNNNNNNNFFFFVVFVVI*I***************************I***************I*IIIIIIIVVFFFFFFFFFNNFFFNNNMNNNNFNNNFNNNNNNFNFFFFFFFNNNNMNMNNNNMNNNNNFNFFFFFFFVVIVVIVVVIIIIIIIIVIIIIIIIVVVVVFFFFF
FFFFFFFNFFFFNNFNFFFFNNNNFFFNFFFNFVVVVVVVVVVVFVVVVFFFFFFNFNNFFFFFFNNNNMMMNMNNNMMNNNNNNNFFVVIVVVV**I*I***********************:********************IIIIIVVIVFFFFFFFFNNFNNNNNNFFFFNFFVFVVVVVVFFFFFNFFNFNNNNNNNNNMMMMNMNNNNNFFFFFFFFVVVFFVFVVFVVVVVVVIIIIIVIVVVVVVVVV
FFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNFFFFNFNNFNFFFVVVVVFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFVVVFVI*I*I**I**********************:********************I***IIIVIVVFFFFNFNNFNNNFFNFFVVVFVFVFFFFFVVVVFFVFFVFFFFFNNNNNNMNNMNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFVFFFVFFNFVVVFFVVVVVVFVVVVVVVVV
FNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFNNNNFFFFFVVVVVVVFFVFFFFFFFFFFNNNMMMNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNFFVVVI**VIIII*I******:****************:*******************I*IIIIIIVVVFFFFFNFFNNFFFFFFFFVFFVFVVVVIVVVIIVVFFFNFNNNNNMMNNMNMNMMNMMMMNNNNNFNFFFNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVFFFFVVVVVVVVI
FNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFNNFFFFVFFVVVVFFFFFFVVFFFFFFNNNNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFVVI*IVII*******I*********************:**:*:**************IIIIIIIVVVVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVIIVVVVFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMMNMMMMNNNMMNMMNNFFNNNNFFFNFNFFFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
NFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNFFFVVVVFFFNNMNNNNNNMNNNNNNNMNNMNNFFVVIVIII*****************************:**:*******:**********IIIIIIIVVFVFFFVFFFFNNFFFVVIVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNMMMNNMNNNMMNNNNNNFFNFFFNNNNNNNNFVVVIVVVYRREBRAP*NAI
NFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNFFFVVVVFFFNNMNNNNNNMNNNNNNNMNNMNNFFVVIVIII*****************************:**:*******:**********IIIIIIIVVFVFFFVFFFFNNFFFVVIVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNMMMNNMNNNMMNNNNNNFFNFFFNNNNNNNNFVVVIVVVVVVVVVIVVIVV
NFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFNFFFVVVVFFFNNMNNNNNNMNNNNNNNMNNMNNFFVVIVIII*****************************:**:*******:**********IIIIIIIVVFVFFFVFFFFNNFFFVVIVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNNMMMNNMNNNMMNNNNNNFFNFFFNNNNNNNNFVVVIVVVVVVVVVIVVIVV
NNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVFNNNNMNMNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNFFFVI*********:*****I***********:*:*:**::*:*:****:**********IIIIIIVVVVVVFFFFFFVVVVFFVFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMMMMMMMMMNMMMNMMMMNMMMMNNNMNNNNNMNNFFFNFNNFFNFNNNFFNNFFVVVVIIIIIIIVVVI
FNFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVVFNNNNMNNNMMNNNNNNMMNMNNNNNFFFFFIIII*****I*********************:**:::::::*****::*********IIIIIIIVVVFFFVFVVVVFFFFNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNMMNMMMMNMNMMNMMNNNNMMMMMNMMNNMMNMMNNNNFNNFNFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFVVIVVVVVVVVV
FNFFFFFFFFFFNFFFNFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVFNNNNNNMMNNMNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNFFFFFVVIIIII****:******I*******:***:*::::**::::****************IIIVVVVFFFVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNMNNNMMNMMMNMMMMMMMNMMNNMMMNNNNMNNNNMNMNNNFNFNFFFNNFNNNNFNFFFFFFFFVFVVVVVVV
FNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFNVVFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIVVVVVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNMNNMMMNNNNNNNMNNNNNNFFFFFFVFFFFVIII**II****III********::***:*:::*:*:*::*****:****IIIIVVVFVVFFFFFNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNMMMMNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMMMNNMNNNMNNNNNNNNFFFNFFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVVV
NNFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVVVFVFFFFFFVVFVVVVFFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNMNNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFVVVFFNFFFVVIIIIVIII*****:**:***:**:****::*******II**IIIVVFFVVFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNMMMNMMMNMMMMNNMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVV
FFNNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFVVVVVFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNMNMNNNNNMMNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNFNFNFNFFFFFFFVFFVFFFFFFFVVIII*******:*:*****************IIIIIVFVFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMMNMMMMNMNNNNNNMMMMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMMMMMNMNNNNMNNNNNNNNNFNFFFFFFVFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFV
FFNNNNFNNFFFFFFFFVFFVVVVVFFFVFFFFFVVVVFFVFFFFFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNFNFNFFNFFFNFFFFFNFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVVFVVVIIIIIII*I**********I*IIIVVFVFFFFVFFFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNMNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNMNMMMMNNMNNMMNMMMMNMMNNMNMNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVFFNNFFF
FNNNNFNFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVVVFFFFVFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFNFFFFNFNFNFNFNFFFFNFFFFFFFVFVVVVFVFVFFFFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVFFFFFFFVFNNFNNNFFNNNNMNMMNMNMNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNNNNNNNNNMMMMNMMMMMMMMMMNNNMMMNNMNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFNFFF
NNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVVVFFVVFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNNFNNFNFNFNFNNFNFFFFFNFFFFFFFVFFFFVVFVFVFFFVFVFFFFVFVFFVFFFFVFFFVFFNNNNFFFNNMMMMMMMNMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNFFNNNNNNNNNMNNMMMMMMMMMMMMNNMNMMMMNNMMNMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNFNNFNFFFFFFFFFFFNF
NNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFVFVVVFFVVFFFFVVVVVVVVVVVFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNFFNFFFNNFNFNNNNFNFFNNFNFFFFFFFFFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFVFFFFFVFNNNNNNFFNNNMNMMMMMMMMNNMNNNMNNNNNFFFNNNNNNNMNNNMNMMNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMNNNNNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFNNNNNFFFFFVFFFFFFFF
FNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFFVVVFVVVVFFFVVVVVFVVVVVVFFNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFNNFNNNFFNNFNNNNNNFFFNFNNFFFFFVFVFVFVFFFFFFFFFFFFFFVFFFFVFFFFVFFFNNNNNNNNNMNNNNMMMMMMMNMNNNNNN

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:10, Reply)
could do with a fringe to cover that massive forehead

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:14, Reply)
She is a bit of a slaphead.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:16, Reply)
That's not a fourhead. It's a five head.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:17, Reply)
fiveskin ?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:21, Reply)
Ewww, no.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:23, Reply)
Shakespeare is looking ROUGH

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:43, Reply)
Oh, and when I post copypasted shit it's "hyper bent" and this hits the popular page in seconds.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:18, Reply)
Lord, m8

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:19, Reply)
I'm seething

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:23, Reply)
This doesn't take five minutes to read.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:21, Reply)
I'm leaving forever

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:23, Reply)
or...... five ever ?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:26, Reply)
Enhance 57 to 19. Track 45 left. Stop. Enhance 15 to 23. Rotate 180. Give me a hard copy right there

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:28, Reply)

py ck
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:29, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiqkclCJsZs
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:38, Reply)
Edward Hopper did much better paintings than Da Vinci.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:37, Reply)
OK, adding you to my Ignore list.
Farewell five-ever, Two Hats.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:45, Reply)
Bye m8

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:47, Reply)
who are you going to take off it to make space for him?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:47, Reply)
Not sure I can risk it, now that QOTW lives again.
The roll of shame:
Benharrmeen
Tvit
Hans-Hubert
rodgerthebutler
spammonkey
Me luv UK.
BrushHead
Sir_Rowsty
Professor Denzil Dexter
tehendz
Pat Sajak
baaa
metooleopard
philtheodebuzzard
jkchubbes
ftzdomino
alky
SPoRk
General Observer, if u dont believe me here's my boarding pass
Magic Mush
GaryNiger of the GNAA does not believe in censorship
dj28GNAA
louisblack
The Brown Recluse
Knobbler
tombyrne
wordy
acidtrash
georgebush666.com
baaadastardly
harrydewhirst
codiak
ACE!
Sammy Silver
Utopia Planitia
Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta!
ITS A CNUTING READING!
Blobcat
giant_squid
hypnoticme
Humpty Dumpty was Pushed
The Archduke of South London
court escaper
His Popiness the Hole
Scrumper
badgermonkey007
raulduke
imchocked
skeltonator
Mystery_Machine
Terry Oblong
Spaff_Quaffer
hiraeth
DrPrunesquallor
TitanLX
Blunt Logic
little lord muthafuckin fauntleroy
Bermuda_import
libraryboy
Coin Operated Boy
Nahla
mr_spongmonkey
square go
sabre-tooth monkey
clockworkrat
bierbelly
SirStromming
Studentken
danniekavanagh
Keiths Dad
baldmonkey
(|D[ekionplexis
Pete Drexler
Sebastian Dried-on excreta
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:58, Reply)
well baldmonkey is banned so you could remove him, as is baaa i think

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:03, Reply)
Thanks, mongy.
Updated. Not that I'd put 2H on the list, of course.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:07, Reply)
and Sebastian Dried-on excreta was frank, also banned

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:08, Reply)
This place would be dead on its are, without Frank.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:15, Reply)

ithout Frank e led it off the road
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:17, Reply)
RIP to all on that list :*(

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:58, Reply)
I've heard of a grand total of five of those.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:01, Reply)
Me too
I mean, who the fuck is 'monster munch'??
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:02, Reply)
lol

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:14, Reply)
Think he was some conspiracy theory nut

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:15, Reply)
well he's obviously some sort of arsehole isn't he?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:49, Reply)
none of them post (or can't) anymore

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:02, Reply)
Fair enough, but I've been here for almost ten years now.
Granted, I only started going on /talk relatively recently.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:21, Reply)
Jesus tittyfucking Christ, even reading DTH's full username makes me want to punch someone.
Him, for preference.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 18:47, Reply)
shitty english vodka wins awards, must be fake news
www.kentonline.co.uk/kent-business/county-news/gin-distillery-wins-gold-vodka-chatham-125839/
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:49, Reply)
wankers

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:02, Reply)
It's shit and made out of sugar, an online expert told me

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:10, Reply)
I can't argue with online experts

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:22, Reply)
I wouldn't even try

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:27, Reply)
that's basically a participation trophy, looking at the website

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:11, Reply)
Exactly, shit and rubbish sugar based bollox, might write a scathing review

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:14, Reply)
bit harsh

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:24, Reply)
It's for their own good

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:26, Reply)
Alright 'Mark E Smith'.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 17:51, Reply)
I'm happy for you

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:55, Reply)
x

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 16:56, Reply)
Good afternoon.
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:44, Reply)
I served our Lord Christ once.
Tight cunt didn't even tip. Typical Jew.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:47, Reply)
I worked with a guy called jesus. He was gay. And a thief.
Makes you think.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:48, Reply)
did he steal your heart?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:49, Reply)
No. About 800 quid out of the till and a camera

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:51, Reply)
Did he conceal the camera up his bum?
I ask because it's a well known fact that gay men compulsively put things up their bums.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:59, Reply)
Well known fact? Or personal experience?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:01, Reply)
I'm sure the sitation developped quickly

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:11, Reply)
How many ps?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:15, Reply)
Spellcheck doesn't work in the subject line
with no wobbly red lines I take no responsibility for my mistakes
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:20, Reply)
Nobody fucks with the Jesus.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:49, Reply)
This is where I stayed in Barcelona
holidayjesus.com/index.html
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:50, Reply)
Looks awful

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:51, Reply)
lol
Actually, it was really nice.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:53, Reply)
You're really nice

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:55, Reply)
thank you

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:58, Reply)
Your own

Holiday

Jesus
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:52, Reply)
Quite

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:53, Reply)
he had a handful of coins for you but they all fell through the hole

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:48, Reply)
cheers

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:47, Reply)
Cheers

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:47, Reply)
cheers

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:48, Reply)
Well,
The Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘When any man has an unusual bodily discharge, such a discharge is unclean. Whether it continues flowing from his body or is blocked, it will make him unclean. This is how his discharge will bring about uncleanness:

“‘Any bed the man with a discharge lies on will be unclean, and anything he sits on will be unclean. Anyone who touches his bed must wash their clothes and bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening. Whoever sits on anything that the man with a discharge sat on must wash their clothes and bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening.

“‘Whoever touches the man who has a discharge must wash their clothes and bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening.

“‘If the man with the discharge spits on anyone who is clean, they must wash their clothes and bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening.

“‘Everything the man sits on when riding will be unclean, and whoever touches any of the things that were under him will be unclean till evening; whoever picks up those things must wash their clothes and bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening.

“‘Anyone the man with a discharge touches without rinsing his hands with water must wash their clothes and bathe with water, and they will be unclean till evening.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:50, Reply)
common sense really

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:01, Reply)
With the amount of unusual bodily discharge I have, it's best I live alone by the sound of it.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:09, Reply)
Speak of 'the Lord'....

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:11, Reply)
this is more bullshit than the payrise HR promised me if I did that wholly unneccessary training in my own free time

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:49, Reply)
Another one of your 'threads'.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:52, Reply)
If you don't like my threads,
have you heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:55, Reply)
i've updated the alcoholics anonymous prayer for all you foood addicts out there, one day at a time x
God grant me the SERENITY to
accept the fooods I cannot eat;
the COURAGE to eat the fooods I can;
and the WISDOM to know the difference.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:53, Reply)
my mate went to narcotics anonymous
it turned him into a mental paranoid and then he killed himself
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:55, Reply)
so cured him of his drug problem, another success story

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:57, Reply)
We need to be funding these things more.
Get drugs off our streets.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:58, Reply)
They probably think of that as a success
going back on the scag would be a fail
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:58, Reply)
they don't see relapse as a failure, they'd have no members if they did

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:00, Reply)
No members could be 100% success
just sayin'
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:05, Reply)
they are only putting it on anyway, alcoholism and drug addiction, just made up illnesses, fake news, more money is needed for this
www.oagb.org.uk
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:07, Reply)
Oh probably
enough to turn you to drink eh? I've got a bottle of scotch in the desk draw, it is very tempting...
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:10, Reply)
Go for it, never caused any harm has it

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:14, Reply)
It's not like I drive a bin lorry
is it?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:21, Reply)
Beautiful, and secular.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:55, Reply)
Mmmmm Courage

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:57, Reply)
steady, remember it's not the last biscuit in the packet that makes you fat, it's eating the first

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:59, Reply)
Look, you're the one insighting food talk
you hypocritical wanger
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:06, Reply)
hey you can lash out at me, i can take it, recovery has it's ups and downs

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:09, Reply)
The 12 unsteady steps programme?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:10, Reply)
Directors is a good pint, if memory serves.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:00, Reply)
Yes

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:04, Reply)
yet that bloody commie corbin wants to tax all of our inheritance from the Lord away from us

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:03, Reply)
I'm working hard and living no frills so my kids don't have to

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:05, Reply)
I am on a mission to get my mum to buy a Merc
as she's always wanted one and her and my dad have cash tied up in property. My two-pronged approach is:

You cant take it with you, enjoy it, I can look after myself.
When you go into care I'm not going go help unless you give me your mercedes so you'd better buy one yeah?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:09, Reply)
Everyone needs at least one overpriced Nazi staff car.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:23, Reply)
I've never been behind the wheel of a Merc
and not enjoyed it. Those fascists did know how to build luxury cars...
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:50, Reply)
They're pretty cheap second hand.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:32, Reply)
I'm going to give you *such* a smack.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:05, Reply)
Well, in 1 Chronicles 12:17 of the new international vdrsion,
David went out to meet them and said to them, “If you have come to me in peace to help me, I am ready for you to join me. But if you have come to betray me to my enemies when my hands are free from violence, may the God of our ancestors see it and judge you.”
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:08, Reply)
He was a pompous prick, that David.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:10, Reply)
0 bible results for "Pompous"


Sorry, we didn’t find any results for your search. Please try the following:

Double-check spelling, especially people and place names.
Make sure there are spaces between words. Bible Gateway treats “nameoftheFather” and “name of the Father” differently.
Use fewer words in your search, especially if you’re unsure of the exact phrase. For example, “baptizing name Father” and “baptizing them in the name of the Father” will both return Matthew 28:19; however, the latter leaves a greater chance for spelling and syntax errors.
Retry your search in another translation.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:12, Reply)
What is this?
Thought for the day?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:15, Reply)
Sure
But David thought to himself, “One of these days I will be destroyed by the hand of Saul. The best thing I can do is to escape to the land of the Philistines. Then Saul will give up searching for me anywhere in Israel, and I will slip out of his hand.”
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:16, Reply)
Nimble fingers that Saul.
David was right to be worried, lest he repeat the sins of Onan.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:24, Reply)
Deuteronomy 21:12
"Then thou shalt bring her home to thine house, and she shall shave her head, and pare her nails;"

Think the next lines are "It puts the lotion in the basket"
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:24, Reply)

So Joab sent someone to Tekoa and had a wise woman brought from there. He said to her, “Pretend you are in mourning. Dress in mourning clothes, and don’t use any cosmetic lotions. Act like a woman who has spent many days grieving for the dead.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:30, Reply)
this thread is megabent
it's like the five different colours of bent combined their powers to make a bentazoid
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:48, Reply)
^ this Power Ranger-y simile is also bent and therefore fits the thread nicely.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:54, Reply)
I was thinking of Captain Planet
who was the bentest of the best
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:57, Reply)
Haven't even seen that, which means it must be hyperbent.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 14:59, Reply)
Never did get that gay page

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
Sad toimes.
Maybe it's time to start a gay thread.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 15:15, Reply)
Yeah yeah, that's quite enough of that shit.
Here's a REAL thread for HARDCORE BOARDERS.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:03, Reply)

RE CKED

*canned laughter*
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:04, Reply)
Or perhaps you'd feel more comfortable on this site
www.gaylord.com/
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:05, Reply)
When I went to Florida
we drove past a place called 'Gaylord Palms'. I lol'd.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:06, Reply)
I bet you pulled your twanger afterwards

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:12, Reply)
Well it wasn't going to pull itself

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:15, Reply)
'Drove past' yeah? *rubs chin*

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:17, Reply)
They wouldn't let me in :(

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:19, Reply)
*rubs chin even more*

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:19, Reply)
I think we should bow to his lordship

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:21, Reply)
The Lord of Lords

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:22, Reply)
I don't have to take this
I'm leaving forever
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:27, Reply)
Where're you going to go to - THE HOUSE OF LORDS?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:28, Reply)
This is where you live, m8
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lordshill
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:29, Reply)
thankfully it's shut down now, pleasure garden in a pub, fucking benders
www.boroughphotos.org/bexley/phbos_2_377/
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:43, Reply)
revolting

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:45, Reply)
it hasn't changed that much, got rid of the name tho, and it's a shitty carvery now
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a5/Coach_House%2C_Bexleyheath%2C_DA6_%283416147256%29.jpg
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:46, Reply)
Cry & Bait Stables?
what the fuck was that? Jaysus...
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:22, Reply)
dunno, i wasn't alive in 1900, and by the time i first went there in the early 80's cars had replaced horse and carts

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:28, Reply)
i'm going to guess it was livery and bait stables

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:30, Reply)
Sounds horrific

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:32, Reply)
Your favourite singer
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lorde
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:30, Reply)
I've reported all of this, btw
You'll be hearing from Rob shortly. He's popped out to Londis right now, but he'll be emailing you as soon as he gets back.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:36, Reply)
Unlikely, he's just been nicked for shoplifting a can of Skol Super and a Fray Bentos pie

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:42, Reply)
shit i didn't know he'd got on the bentos , that's sad

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:44, Reply)
He's beyond help now

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:44, Reply)
he should never have got on that cheap ham

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:48, Reply)
That's how they get you hooked
'here, have this ham rob, only 50p' - fast forward six months and he's sucking cocks for bacon round the back of Bejams :(
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:51, Reply)
Bejams byjesus
careful or there will be talk of Rumbelows and Fine Fare
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:34, Reply)
I heard on Friday's he's onto Super T and K cider snakebites.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:56, Reply)
No harm in that , probably takes the edge off his ham jitters

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:59, Reply)
'ham jitters' sounds like an unpleasant eumphamism.
Probably something to do with Michael J Fox and foreplay.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:10, Reply)
LORDis, more like

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:42, Reply)
EXACTLY

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:47, Reply)
rude

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:05, Reply)
That's how I feel and I make no apology for that

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:15, Reply)
AWWW JEAH
it's web-surfin' time
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:06, Reply)
YESSSS

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:16, Reply)
#hc4life

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:09, Reply)
Hc4eva

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:16, Reply)
Hardcore materials for gentlemen and ladies
www.concrete.org.uk/fingertips-nuggets.asp?cmd=display&id=663
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:09, Reply)
phwoar, type 1

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:16, Reply)
fucking gypsum, killed the dinosaurs

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:20, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:21, Reply)

are gypsies made of gypsum? Or is gypsum made of gypsies?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:29, Reply)
Oh dear, have you been eating food again Gary?
You seem a bit incoherent
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:35, Reply)
Coherence is for AI
I am REAL
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:47, Reply)
Don't be stupid
'Gypsum' is the plural of 'gypsies'
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:35, Reply)
It's a collective noun for sum gypsies.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:46, Reply)
Thank you
I have learned something today.

So some gypsies killed the dinosaurs then?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:47, Reply)
They're the ones who crashed the asteroid into the Earth,
but only because they were permanently plastered.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:01, Reply)
This is bad

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:19, Reply)
Only the baddest for McBeef's hardcore threads.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
a man needs his nuggets

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:34, Reply)
steady, he'll be rushing off to you know where with that sort of talk

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:49, Reply)
I'm more of a casual boarder, so I'll just wait for the next one.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:11, Reply)
Then please leave this thread immediately, you're spoiling the vibe

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:20, Reply)
that's me b

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:12, Reply)
Recognise the realness yo

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:14, Reply)
I can't deal with your realness,
so I'll have to sit this one out.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:21, Reply)
probably a wise move m8
Things can get puh-RETTY wild in these threads
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:29, Reply)
what are the requirements to be REAL?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:28, Reply)
street smarts, fly kicks, dope rhymes, you know - the real shit

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:34, Reply)
sick beats?
ill behaviour?
diseased organs?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:35, Reply)
Yep
Especially diseased organs
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:43, Reply)
i knew it

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:48, Reply)
hmm, I don't like any of that

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:51, Reply)
Mcbeef is a big gay spaz who loves it up his bum-bum from other gay spazzes.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:37, Reply)
^this guy gets it!

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:44, Reply)
Oh, I once bought a hardcore porno mag when I was lashed.
I panicked a bit about which one to get and I got "Asian babes"
It was awful.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:06, Reply)
racist

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
Can you buy mags with hard willies in it in the UK?
I seem to remember that was banned as part of the odd repressed laws on porn over there.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
I dunno. Ask TH

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:09, Reply)
This is so GS it hurts.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:11, Reply)
A bit like GS.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:11, Reply)
You'd know m8

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:36, Reply)
Hey, I'm not gay,
but £20 is £20.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:48, Reply)

I seem to remember that was banned as part of the odd repressed laws on porn over there asking for a friend
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:12, Reply)
Maybe in licensed sex shops, but not in the newsagents.
My landlord had a couple of "hardcore" mags stashed in the airing cupboard, but penetration was always hidden behind a coloured circle, and cumshots looked to have been faked with icing sugar.

This is all going back a few years, mind. Could be different, now.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:32, Reply)
I guess some people, even in this age of on-demand hi-def internet porn, think you just can't beat the warm analogue crackle of printed smut.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:36, Reply)
No one ever discards a fully loaded iPad in a hedge, do they?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:39, Reply)
Gonz probably has, either by accident or because they just released one that was virtually identical but cost £200 more.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:47, Reply)
Lundi is day of the moon.
Dimanche is day of the Lord.

Just diving in with some hardcore French weekday translations.

I bet Sunday is Two Hats' favourite day, too.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:08, Reply)
Thursday was originally t'Hurd's Day
so get ready for some whippy-haired arse-kicking tomorrow.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:17, Reply)

THE LORD IS RESTORING LOST TIME CONCERNING THE VISION HE GAVE YOU AND ADDING INCREASE TO IT!!

Lana Vawser

The Lord is restoring "lost time" right now especially in the areas of destiny. The Lord is opening many new doors right now for His people which is catapulting them into another realm and step of their destiny, yet many area feeling like their time to sow into the vision is being stolen and hindered.

Many are feeling like momentum is being lost, rather than being gained and it is building a level of hopelessness in many hearts as they continue to contend for breakthrough, provision and time to "put their hands to" the vision and dream God has given them.

I saw in the spirit that the enemy was bringing "road block" after "road block" against many and releasing a significant whirlwind of confusion to attempt to cause God's people to wonder whether they are "out of season" with putting their hands to the vision the Lord has given them. I watched in the spirit as the enemy was placing a clock before the faces of many of God's people and spinning the hands, so many felt "out of control" because they cannot seem to gain traction and momentum in moving deeper into the "outworking" of the vision Jesus had given them. I watched as the enemy burst into fits of laughter at his pleasure and delight of seeing God's people disorientated and disillusioned over the vision Jesus had given them.

Just when the enemy thought he had gained the upper hand, I saw Jesus and He decreed "I am redeeming lost time. My people will have the last laugh, the laugh of VICTORY IN THEIR VISION and I am now releasing the winds of change and double portion ACCELERATION to not only see the time they have lost because of this opposition, restored, but they will move into an INCREASE ON THEIR VISION, they will have MORE than they had before."

"Where there has been such confusion over the vision I have given My people and what's going on, I am now releasing an increase of wisdom, clarity, creativity, witty inventions and insight into the vision to go further than you would have ever thought you would go in this vision and dream."

Not only was Jesus restoring time that was lost through the winds of acceleration, the vindication of God was exploding all around, through the double portion increase, recompense and restoration that He was releasing over their vision.

The enemy has been screaming that the breakthrough and momentum for the vision is further away than ever, yet the true reality is, the BREAKTHROUGH for the vision is UPON YOU!

There is a breaker anointing that the Lord is releasing for you to SEE THE VISION THROUGH! It's not going to be just a "vision" anymore, but a tidal wave of His favour is being released, to catapult you into a slipstream of ease, grace and anointing by His Spirit to see you go even further with His vision than you originally anticipated or dreamed.

I felt the Lord say that what would have taken weeks and months to "set up" and "do" in the natural, now with the winds of acceleration released upon the vision, things will be set up and done SUDDENLY and without striving but by the power and empowerment of His Spirit.

The enemy is attempting to convince many of you that there is a DELAY upon you but the truth is there is a NEW DAY upon you!

God is redeeming lost time. The warfare over the vision, the opposition over the vision, the road blocks over the vision He has given you, as hard as it has been, REJOICE, for it has set you up for greater increase, favour and breakthrough than you could imagine.

I also saw those who were carrying visions and dreams from many years ago and it seemed like the vision/dream was miscarried or aborted, the Lord is breathing resurrection life upon those visions/dreams and they are suddenly coming back to life. They are springing forth SUDDENLY with increase and momentum and moving you into new positions. What the Lord will do in the vision/dream He gave you in this season will make up for all lost time with all the provision, breakthrough and favour He will breathe upon it in this season. The lie will break that you have "come out short". You will come out with MORE than you have ever had before.

Take heart! Your vision has gained INTEREST in the heavenlies! The Lord is activating the tipping point and SUDDENLY things are going to come together and accelerate taking you to a place of breakthrough that is beyond your wildest imagination.

“Yes indeed, it won’t be long now.” God’s Decree.

“Things are going to happen so fast your head will swim, one thing fast on the heels of the other. You won’t be able to keep up. Everything will be happening at once—and everywhere you look, blessings! Blessings like wine pouring off the mountains and hills. I’ll make everything right again for my people Israel" (Amos 9:13-15 MSG TRANSLATION)
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:20, Reply)


(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:23, Reply)
Did you read it?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:30, Reply)
Saving it for later
thanks
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:35, Reply)
well, this answers my question
about massive pricks in the UK
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:25, Reply)
are you still on about your gay porn mags?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:29, Reply)
Godby was nonced in private school and is only now ready to really explore his sexuality

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:31, Reply)

www.gagomatic.com/content/uploads/images/May2016/quot-i-prefer-being-an-only-child-quot.jpg
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:31, Reply)
Well

This is my favorite painting of Jesus! LAUGHING at the devil! Thinking he could ever hold Him down! LAUGHING at our future! Because everything works out! The Bible says God made an open spectacle of the powers of hell (Col 2:15) that tried to hold Him in the grave when He rose from the dead! He made them look like puny idiots! Heeheehee 😂😂😂 and EVERY TIME you choose to believe God more than your fear, your trial or your pain Jesus laughs! The devil loses and you win!! He's not dead! Hahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣He's alive! Wooohooooo!!!

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:35, Reply)
What the fuck is this?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:37, Reply)
Truth.
Real truth
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:38, Reply)
Tesco Value Skagra

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:49, Reply)
Typical jew

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:46, Reply)
HARDCORE BOTTOM GET

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:30, Reply)
not GS

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:33, Reply)
Totes GS

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:39, Reply)
The Dutch call it 'woensdag', the French say 'mercredi'
In Germany, they'd call it 'Mittwoch', while in Spain, they'd say 'miércoles'! Imagine that! I dunno WHICH one's right, but I do know this; It's fucking wednesday in my house, and that means two days left until the weekend. WHO'S WITH ME?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:07, Reply)
Alt: I'm Yootha Joyce AMA

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:08, Reply)
What's your advice for young people looking to buy a property in the current financial climate?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:10, Reply)
Don't go to the top of your budget
You need breathing room for home improvements or emergency situations.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
win the lottery

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:46, Reply)
why did you die?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:14, Reply)
It was my time, $$
It was my time
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
why do you have such a stupid name?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:15, Reply)
Take it up with my mother

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
oh you can bet i will
*lewd gesture*
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:05, Reply)

Yootha Jazzy
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:28, Reply)
Hi Joyce, thanks for doing this AMA
My questions to you are

a) what was like being a heavily-outnumbered woman in the Zulu Nation back in the day and
b) what is your take on the whole 'Afrika Bambaataa is a nonce' thing?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:29, Reply)
Wait. Bambaata is a nonce?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:31, Reply)
I really don't know - he's been accused of it by some bender
Doesn't mean it's true though
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:52, Reply)
Well, someone wouldn't just lie, surely.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:08, Reply)
There are some fucking pricks out there m8

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:11, Reply)
What a world.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:15, Reply)
Speaking of pricks and nonces, Woody Allen decided to do a Facebook ama.
Seems a bit ill-conceived.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:23, Reply)
I fucking hate that cunt
/ac
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:33, Reply)
You've spoken on here how you're not supposed to address Africa, how /are/ you supposed to address him?
Mr Bambaata? Seems a bit formal.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:54, Reply)
Bam

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:59, Reply)
will you touch my willy for money?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:20, Reply)
absolutely

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:37, Reply)
I'm not working the rest of this week mate, so I'm way ahead of you.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:09, Reply)
Noice
How come?
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:09, Reply)
Horse stuff today, hospital stuff tomorrow, didn't fancy going back in just for friday.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
Makes sense

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
I thought so

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:12, Reply)
I'm with you,
but I'm not in with you.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:10, Reply)
I can't ask for more than that

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:10, Reply)
And you'll never have to.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:12, Reply)
not this time, soz

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:14, Reply)

mercredi i surrender!
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:15, Reply)
As if OUR boarders need protecting, eh?
hahaha
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:55, Reply)
what are you like

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:14, Reply)
I have no idea
but I DID mis-spell 'borders'. So I'll always have that.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:42, Reply)
i assumed you were making a joke about the forum

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:44, Reply)
You think too much of me

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:46, Reply)
it's true
sometimes i think of you when i'm at home. alone.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:02, Reply)
Germanic languages called it a variation of Odin, the allfather of gods
while the romance languages called it after mercury, the voice of the gods, like the Metatron. When the christians went on their cultural genocide across Europe, the first point of order was to get rid of references to these gods, to greater or lesser success depending on the country. Germany has "midweek" instead of Odin's day, but all the other days are still norse gods. In France it's still the Roman pantheon. In Poland it's completely Christian even though it makes no fucking sense, because although Wednesday is "middle day", Thursday is "fourth day" which is the middle of a seven-day week, it's like those pricks can't even do basic arithmetic.

Baltic states just number them from 1 to 7 IIRC.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:20, Reply)
#thatsnotfuckinginterestingintheslightest

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:20, Reply)
Talking of Odin
(Spoiler alert) I'm watching that American Gods, tgere was a pretty graphic sex scene, they were also middle eastern. This has caused maximum upset.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:25, Reply)
I watched Doctor Strange last night and it's got a scene with Thor at the end of the credits
so we can expect more bastardisations of north european mythology in the near future, hurrah
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:26, Reply)
There's already like 3 Thor films you bongo.
I thought Doctor Strange was alright, but I don't really like Cumberbatch
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:32, Reply)
I've never been a Cumberbatch fan either but I did enjoy Doctor Strange.
He came across as much less of a turnip-headed weirdo in it than usual.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:07, Reply)
Yeah, it was the least irritating he's been.
I'm almost tempted to watch other stuff he's in, see if he's calmed down a bit.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:09, Reply)
yer I know there's already been some
but I'm just wondering just how much more they can fuck it all up before people get bored of it.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:13, Reply)
I think you're missing that these are marvel comics.
So although there's some use of mythology, it's also just comic book silliness and not really a proper film about the mythology.
Edit: and there must be decades worth of Thor comic story lines.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:17, Reply)
i was going to reply with something like this and then realised it'd be pointless

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:44, Reply)
this is the /talk version of u ok hun/I don't want to talk about it

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:45, Reply)
doesn't seem like it is
just explaining why i went with a simple 'fucking hell'
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:47, Reply)
and yet you still replied
because you wanted to make sure I'd read it, since I hadn't bothered replying the first time. But it's ok, here's the attention you're craving: A T T E N T I O N
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:50, Reply)
righto

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:00, Reply)
fucking hell

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:43, Reply)
i'd have prefered that film if they had just focused on his watch collection

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:47, Reply)
Not many watch based films around these days.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:23, Reply)
just one of the many reasons why
this was so disappointing
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:46, Reply)
and watchmen

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:48, Reply)
which one was it?
The moon face bit looked similar to that record-breaking watch you linked to the other day
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:51, Reply)
jlc master calendar if memory serves me, but he had a whole watch tray full of time pieces

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:00, Reply)
i did think of you during that scene

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:05, Reply)
It's such a short glimpse I struggle to know what they all are, needs a dvd extra

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:08, Reply)
maybe these'll help
www.prestigetime.com/blog/images/Doctor-Stranger-Jaeger-LeCoultre-Master-Ultra-Thin-Perpetual.jpg

www.prestigetime.com/blog/images/dr-strange-movie-watches.jpg
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:47, Reply)
The end credits of Dr Strange don't feature Thor,
it just sets up Mordo as the villain for the sequel.
There was a mid-credits scene with him, though, and a magic beer mug.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:29, Reply)


(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:44, Reply)
hang on
The first point of order for Christians on a pan-European mission of cultural genocide was to get rid of references to pagan deities, and in Germany (a heavily religious bunch) they change the name of one day and leave all the others? That's some SERIOUS GENOCIDE.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:27, Reply)
I bet the Holocaust started on a Wednesday.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:31, Reply)
Hitler was elected on a Thursday
WWII started on a Friday
First kill squad of the Final Solution was a Sunday
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:19, Reply)
Craig David's first draftzzzzzz

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:24, Reply)
Craig David's first draft needed some fine tuning.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:24, Reply)
Solomon Grundy lolz

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:37, Reply)
^soiled man-grundies, more like

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:44, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:47, Reply)
Well, Wednesday is the best day.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:32, Reply)
happy world facilities management day

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:50, Reply)
YES!

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:07, Reply)
The boss should take you all out to celebrate

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:09, Reply)
I've got the day off

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:10, Reply)
and so you should, it's your special day

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)
Might go to the pub

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:17, Reply)
They will probably give you free pints

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:31, Reply)
Yeah go on then, why not

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:23, Reply)
With you for raising the dual concepts of Spanishness and weekends.
Only one and a half days left till the weekend for me. Last night I fired up the barbecue in the garden and discovered that my new neighbours are a Spanish family who live in the true Spanish style, i.e. with their windows wide open so that the whole street can benefit from their television turned up full, their loud telephone conversations, the sound of them banging pots and pans around while cooking, etc.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:25, Reply)
Pots and pans? Heron?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:33, Reply)
*something about long necks because I can't remember the finer details of this meme*
Trufax though: I just went to type the word 'owned' as part of my work document and made the genuine typo of writing 'pwned'.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:47, Reply)
You disgusting nerd

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:11, Reply)
I probably do spend a smidgin too much time on the internet.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)
i'm not reading all that shit that you type

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:41, Reply)
I don't think I am with you
I've just been down an internet rabbit hole and discovered that the Rainbow theme was recorded by a group called Telltale, whose main guy was the chap who played Captain Hastings in Poirot, who is married to Belinda Lang off of Dear John, who I probably would (soz LBs), and in conclusion I might buy Telltale's one and only album and maybe have a think about Lang next time I touch my wang.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:42, Reply)
wang-a-lang-a-ding-dong!

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:44, Reply)
dear john was a depressing sitcom

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:45, Reply)
welling up right from the theme song

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:49, Reply)
really? that's genuinely fascinating, well I never

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
wow

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:55, Reply)
The things you learn, eh.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:00, Reply)
Not very expensive
www.discogs.com/sell/release/3997867?ev=rb
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:01, Reply)
I just paid £9.50 inc postage

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:14, Reply)
I hope it's good

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:37, Reply)
buy two so you have one for scratching

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:47, Reply)
Got to have doubles so he can beat-juggle the intro eh

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:48, Reply)
BUY THIS!

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:41, Reply)
might get the 45 for my kid

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:49, Reply)
That's more interesting than every single one of McBeefs stupid music nonsense links put together.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)
This is very hurtful

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:14, Reply)
Harsh but fair.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:14, Reply)
he'll probably claim he was at a party with Rod, Jane and Freddy in the 90s

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:16, Reply)
He's such a fucking prick isn't he.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:18, Reply)
I *CAN* SEE ALL THIS, YOU KNOW?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:20, Reply)
Oh, sorry m8.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:31, Reply)
you need to use the <mcbeef> tab
so you can say what you like but to him it appears as 'that's interesting, richard'
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:02, Reply)
there you go

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:19, Reply)
It's Wednesday right now, but I'll be having a Mittwoch later on.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:22, Reply)
the Chinese basically just say "third day"
nothing so fancy. I've never known someone named Wednesday, but I knew a Mercedes. and people called something like Tanesha, Shaquita, Rawanda, ... you know, LA ghetto names, like
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:39, Reply)
There's Wednesday Addams.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:50, Reply)
Where?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 11:52, Reply)

There.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 12:03, Reply)
What colour is no morning thread?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 7:50, Reply)
brown

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 7:57, Reply)
oh, yeah
Morning
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 7:57, Reply)
Oh boy, morning sub thread!
Morning
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:09, Reply)
alright, let's get this over with

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:10, Reply)
That's what my wife said.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:05, Reply)
Morning

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:25, Reply)
whatever

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:37, Reply)
You seem a bit down in the dumps

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:46, Reply)
or a bit brown in the trunks

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:50, Reply)
I've had a niggling cold for a week now and doing my head in
and for all the japes about costs, getting a british passport overseas has turned into a Kafkaesque nightmare.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:51, Reply)
racist

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:52, Reply)
What's the hold up?
I briefly looked in to an Irish passport and decided that brexit was probably for the best after all.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:53, Reply)
needed copies of mine and the wife's passports, every single page
and a colour copy of the kid's polish passport, every page
and her birth cert, plus a sworn translation
and our marriage certificate, plus a sworn translation
and two photos signed by a "professional, plus a color copy of THEIR passport
and a nine-page application form signed by all parties involved
and my birth cert. Which I handed over when we got married, so I had to apply for a new copy. Paid the near-30 quid for express 24hour service, and it showed up 12 days later. Apparently express means they make a copy in 24 hours, but still post it out as standard mail so it can take up to two weeks to arrive.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:57, Reply)
if she can't speak english she shouldn't have a british passport

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:59, Reply)
Remember when children didn't need passports, eh?
I don't really understand why that changed, to be honest.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:02, Reply)
probably child trafficking or something

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:04, Reply)
Children are needy and annoying.
I can't understand why anyone would want to import more of them.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:06, Reply)
we only speak English in my house, none of that foreign rubbish

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:03, Reply)
Have you stubbornly refused to assimilate with your host country?
Typical immigrant.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:04, Reply)
he's set up his only little slice of thanet in poland with a grab machine and sticks of rock

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:05, Reply)
The locals know it as Polandistan.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:07, Reply)
yer, I don't cheat on my taxes, my accountant finds it hilarious and calls me 'that crazy foreigner'

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:11, Reply)
Jesus christ.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:22, Reply)
yer, and if they don't receive the application "in time" (whatever that means)
then you forfeit the application fee.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:26, Reply)
It's enough to send you loopy

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:43, Reply)
we're taking back control of are borders

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:54, Reply)
+lady

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:59, Reply)
I'm looking forward to the part where you turn into a cockroach.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:01, Reply)
it's more likely that I'll be taken away for execution after a farcical legal process

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:12, Reply)
I sense a disturbance

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:03, Reply)
In the fork?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:51, Reply)
Anything you like: it can't hear the sandwiches there.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:12, Reply)
16

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:25, Reply)
Mustard yellow
like a 1977 Morris Maxi
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:27, Reply)
British Leyland's first car, fact fans

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:38, Reply)
We had one
as well as a Marina and an Allegro.

We had many crap cars in the 1980s. The British ones were endearing but unreliable, the japanese ones were reliable but dull, the French ones were just awesome.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:44, Reply)
My mum had a Morris Ital
Pea green
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:46, Reply)
My memory of 80s French cars was quite different
the Fuego was a gutless turd that never started if it rained, and the Espace went through three clutches in a year. Peugeots were reliable, but so fucking dull.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:46, Reply)
Citroën's were where the interesting stuff happened, until Peugeot stopped the madness.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:58, Reply)
Peugeot-Citroen had 5 cars competing with each other for a lot of the 80s
they even set up a Romanian firm to increase the competition with itself
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:14, Reply)
The cars we had in the 80s were made in the 70s so... in order
Loved the Peugeot 504 - really comfy with a sunroof.
The Renault 16 smelled nice and looked cool
The Citroen CX was awesome - it had hydraulic suspension and you could raise or lower it with a lever, the stereo was next to the handbrake and it had a single spoke on the steering wheel. To a 10 year old these were the coolest things ever.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:23, Reply)
they also looked really good with the bonnet closed, if you ever got the chance to see that.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:28, Reply)
Plumber's nightmare was what we called the CX
We had it for as long as the suspension worked, when that went faulty it was agreed we'd push it over a cliff. I joke not. There was a dump nearby with a huge drop into it and we threw several cars over it when they were no longer fixable.

To be fair, none of the french cars were any less reliable than the British motors we had. Although the Renualt 5 my gran had hit a new low. She carried a large steel bar with her to clout the starter motor to get it to work. Brilliant sight if she ever stalled it in traffic.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:33, Reply)
Having to bash the starter was dead common on Escorts.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:59, Reply)
My Dad bought a dozen Mazda vans on ebay over the course of a decade
every single one needed the starter smacked, which was handy since it was below the passenger seat.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:01, Reply)
You rarely hear that
wuuhhhhh wuhhhhhh wuhhhhhhh clunk .... wuhhhhhh wuhhhhh wuhhhhh clunk of cars not starting any more. Having to bump start them, lost skill. Parking on a hill, jumpers for goalposts, you know.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
White gold

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:29, Reply)
is this about that dress again?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:50, Reply)
i have never worn a dress, that is fake news

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:07, Reply)
Grey with black & blue text. Just like the morning thread.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:43, Reply)
Rainbow x x x

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:47, Reply)
woah

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:49, Reply)
keep it to the gay board you two

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:53, Reply)
they'll be leaking their juices all over this forum soon

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:56, Reply)
SINCE YOU BEEN GONE

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:54, Reply)
Up above the street is and house is

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:34, Reply)
there isn't enough psych folk used in children's television programmes these days, in my opinion

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:39, Reply)
The full version is terrifying

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:40, Reply)
Tom Six's
Rainbow: Full Sequence
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:42, Reply)
House of 1000 Flumps

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:45, Reply)
Jamie & His Magic Torture Porn

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:09, Reply)
all the colours of the rainbow

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:49, Reply)
god damn it

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:59, Reply)
i think we have to get married now

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:55, Reply)
Seems like we have no choice

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:56, Reply)
I ain't afraid of no morning thread

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:52, Reply)

static.wixstatic.com/media/a9210a_3d983179c64545beb404fd9d4b0a20d5~mv2.png_srz_748_459_85_22_0.50_1.20_0.00_png_srz
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:02, Reply)
Do wot

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 8:58, Reply)
that was my nickname as an apprentice

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:00, Reply)
^ KLF Dalek

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:03, Reply)
^The Shamen Cybermen

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:04, Reply)
^ The Empty Child Prodigy

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:08, Reply)
^ The Basement Captain Jaxx

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:49, Reply)
Doctor Who, not Pirates Of The Caribbean.

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:52, Reply)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Harkness
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:45, Reply)
^jerry sadowitz

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:59, Reply)
misty buff

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:17, Reply)
I'm having the devil's own job staying awake this morning,
even though I went to be early last night and had only two small beers. Sodding heat.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:25, Reply)
Take a cool shower,
and go to bed whilst you're still damp. Naked, obvs.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:41, Reply)
My shower wouldn't go any colder than warm this morning.
First time that's ever happened to me.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:47, Reply)
Get in the fridge

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:48, Reply)
You live in Manchester don't you?
So this heatwave is what, 14, 15 degrees C?

(I've never before or since known cold or fever the likes of which I experienced when I lived in Rusholme)
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:51, Reply)
Oxford can be pretty vicious in the cold stakes sometimes.
It's in a dip so it's at least a couple of degrees colder than the surrounding towns, and it's breathtakingly damp.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:54, Reply)
Oxford mate.
As Yeti says, we've got a little micro climate going on. It's about 18c and hammering with rain
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:56, Reply)

Can't believe it's been nearly 10 years since them slags edited episodes of GI Joe
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 9:54, Reply)
'member when Top Cat was called 'Boss Cat', member?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9U4WPz-5vs
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:00, Reply)
Is this a Bernstein bears thing?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:01, Reply)
Wasn't that something to do with the copyright on a brand of cat food?

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:01, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2586780
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 10:11, Reply)
is spanishfly the new baldmonkey or am I missing something?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 21:57, Reply)
Maybe.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:00, Reply)
cheers

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:01, Reply)
He says he's changed

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:02, Reply)
He says lots of things.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:05, Reply)
from what to what?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:06, Reply)
Mentalist, to forum user

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:06, Reply)
I have changed.
I am now a beautiful tree.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:15, Reply)
you mean like
cartermatt.bgmyzuarasgpknxgxbrs.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/The-Mentalist.jpg ?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:36, Reply)
That is EXACTLY how I look

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:03, Reply)
yes

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:02, Reply)
I've never seen them in the same room together.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:02, Reply)
I have never been in the same room as you...either...so am I planearm as well?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:29, Reply)
I don't know who baldhonkey is...so I couldn't possibly comment.
Thanks for taking me off ignore microtoy.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:16, Reply)
didn't realise you were old chum
certainly wasn't a recent action
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:22, Reply)
Nooo I think you have had me in the no friend zone for quite some time.
I think you got very very upset about something. But the reason eludes me now.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:29, Reply)
you were probably acting the prick then

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:00, Reply)
It is almost certain.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:03, Reply)
Nah baldmonkey was alright

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:14, Reply)
God people are pricks, I just posted on the BBC news website saying I don't want to pay any more tax and they start saying I should care more about the NHS and my patients.
I really wish I had one of those jobs where you don't have to speak to people and you can hide all the money you make on an island somewhere.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:52, Reply)
Become a Nigerian e doc

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 0:04, Reply)
OK, cheers

(, Wed 17 May 2017, 0:15, Reply)
I could've told you being a doctor would be a pain in the hoop mate.
Would've saved a few years at medical school.
(, Wed 17 May 2017, 0:16, Reply)
I dunno, ask him if he seen a bird

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:53, Reply)
I have bruised my nipple while having a seizure
And it fucking kills.

What have you bruised?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 18:58, Reply)
Frankly I don't know why you expect us to believe a single word you ever say.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:14, Reply)
Erm...why??

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:34, Reply)
Because you have an established history of being a fantasist?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:35, Reply)
an apple

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:19, Reply)
you say a napple
I say a nipple
Let's call the whole thing off
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:26, Reply)

an WH
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:28, Reply)
steady on there,
it's a school night
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:29, Reply)
not that that usually stops me

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:29, Reply)
You said you were better now

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:34, Reply)
I am. I no longer have pneumonia. No I just have these
"grand mal seizures" I believe they are called.

My great GP 2 can will get to the bottom of it I am sure.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:45, Reply)
Someone else's head
I missed badly in badminton today
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 19:52, Reply)
Hehe that made me do a lol

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 20:13, Reply)
I bashed my bishop.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 20:43, Reply)

my Ian
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 21:11, Reply)
pics or gtfo

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 21:17, Reply)
You wanna see a doctor about your seizures.
I bruised a testicle once. Ouch
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 21:50, Reply)
I bet it was worth it though

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 21:53, Reply)
No mate. I fell off my skateboard on to a rail and then off the rail on to my face and then I cried

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 21:55, Reply)
Gnarly.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 22:29, Reply)
MUFF GUFFS
Just booked a romantic 3-day trip to Paris in the summer. Just me, my wife...and my dad..and his wife...

Bit worried about it actually, with all those restaurants around I'm concerned that my father will relapse. He's a recovering food addict, 14 months clean.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:33, Reply)
as my sponsor D'Shaun Williams said:
"Nigger you got this. I don't wanna see no white ass haunting the candy aisle like some wannabe diabetic Casper the ghost."
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:37, Reply)
I've been told off on Reddit for suggesting that this is picture isn't actually 'old school cool'
i.imgur.com/xRBkuVk.jpg

ffs
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:39, Reply)
Do they have a category for 'Old school horrific and cringeworthy'

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:40, Reply)
I'll ask, back in a mo

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:42, Reply)
Apparently it's the same one

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:43, Reply)

www.genuinehaha.com/product/art-print-hip-hop-haunted-house
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:47, Reply)
righto

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:51, Reply)
just joining in with 'bollocks i found on reddit'.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:52, Reply)
lol

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:51, Reply)
Drawing a dick on the bears forehead didn't work out, can you help me draw a dick going into its mouth instead?
bear
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 18:30, Reply)
I start but then I get bored
/links has too many autisms who look after it
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 18:49, Reply)
On it

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 18:50, Reply)
might be a bit soon in his recovery, all those patisseries and charcuteries, better numb him to them with a few bottles of brandy in the mornings and carry one with you at all times

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:41, Reply)
Yeah if I distract him with a bottle of pastis over breakfast hopefully it will help with the cravings

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:43, Reply)
the worlds gone mad
www.chanel.com/en_GB/fashion/products/other-accessories/s.boomerang-wood-resin-black.17P.A52864X1146494305.html
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:45, Reply)
That's the wife's xmas present sorted, nice one

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:46, Reply)
"Crikey! I could hit a baby out of a dingo's mouth with that."

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:50, Reply)
At the risk of looking foolish
is that just a boomerang?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:48, Reply)
Made by chanel tho and over a grand

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:49, Reply)
good god

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:52, Reply)
You'd be the blingest abbo on the ressie mate

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:57, Reply)
Apparently they call them 'boongs' rather than 'abbos' in Sydney

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:01, Reply)
They can be very racist, and sexist

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:07, Reply)
At 1300 note the cunt best come back.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:02, Reply)
NAH, *THIS* IS A KNOIFE

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:50, Reply)
Oi wooda called 'em chuzzwungas!

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:52, Reply)
Shut up McBeef

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:49, Reply)
no u

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:53, Reply)
Paris is alright. If you like French food and stupid American tourists

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:50, Reply)
Sounds perfect

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:52, Reply)
I like French good

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:53, Reply)
J'adore bon francais

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:55, Reply)
What?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:56, Reply)
I, like, French good and I can not lie

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:00, Reply)
go up tour montparnasse
it's cheaper and less busy than the eiffel tower, plus you get to see the eiffel tower from it

edit - and there aren't loads of greebos trying to flog you tat at the bottom
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:56, Reply)
Thanks I like this!, but I won't be going up any towers.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:02, Reply)
Will anything be going up your tower?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:08, Reply)
no m8

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:24, Reply)
well i'm terrible with height but if it helps the lift is internal
and you can get off at the floor below the top which is indoors and a lot less scary

plus don't forget it's socially acceptable in france to drink wine with brunch from cafes at 10:00 in the morning, nothing tower related but it's good to know :)
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 18:17, Reply)
I just passed Matt Berry in the street
then, a block along I passed Ed Balls.

It was a celebrity double-whammy.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:00, Reply)
Matt Berry lives in Borough, was it round there?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:04, Reply)
No, it was on Tottenham Court Road
Ed Balls was coming out of the Boots
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:09, Reply)
I've seen him at borough market, looked like a fat arty Ponce

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:09, Reply)
I think he's great tbh
Those 'Matt Berry Does' short things he does on the BBC crack me up
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:11, Reply)
His band's not very good, though, apart from their Ronnie Hazelhurst medley

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:12, Reply)
yeah I did see a video of his band
not great
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:13, Reply)
Sorry! theme into Are You Being Served, though - dope shit

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:15, Reply)
Needs more airwolf.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:20, Reply)
I like his stuff , but I feel he might be a tad arty farty irl

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:13, Reply)
That's actors for you I suppose

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:15, Reply)
I saw him wearing a cravat and it made me feel uncomfortable

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:19, Reply)
He has a touch of the portillos about him

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:24, Reply)
^stalker

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:10, Reply)
^roy walker

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:16, Reply)
^Stan Boardman

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:19, Reply)
^Tom O'Connor

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:22, Reply)
^that black guy from the 70s I can't remember his name

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:32, Reply)
Kenny lynch?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:33, Reply)
Must be, he was the only one

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:36, Reply)
Hang on, Derek Griffiths? Or was he more 80s

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:37, Reply)
it was Charlie Williams I was thinking of

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:37, Reply)
I was just about to say him, wasn't there a Welsh one too

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:40, Reply)
Or a Yorkshire one, they all blah blah

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:42, Reply)
TIL Charlie Williams and Kenny Lynch aren't the same person

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:46, Reply)
^should be stepped for racism

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:47, Reply)
that, and so much more

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:49, Reply)

t +my P , my wife... ..and his wife

Bit worried about it actually, with all those restaurants around I'm concerned that my father will relapse. He's a recovering food addict, 14 months clean.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 17:05, Reply)
Bottom get

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 20:19, Reply)
fuck that noise
alright
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:52, Reply)
An hour till 'tools down'.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:58, Reply)
lucky

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:58, Reply)
Cunt, 3+ for me, and I've got to do a shop on the way home.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:58, Reply)
I've got to do a shop as well.
SHOP CHAT.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:02, Reply)
i avoided this horror like a pro
by which i mean i left my wallet at home
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
could always go shoplifting

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:12, Reply)
Oh, Sheheqazaramesh, will you ever learn?
frinkiac.com/gif/S07E11/459758/467065.gif?b64lines=
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:14, Reply)
i've considered it
lucky my staff card had two free coffees on it
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:26, Reply)
Wait, your coffee isn't just there?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:50, Reply)
i... i don't know how to answer this

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:57, Reply)
What you getting?
I've got
B/Spinach x 2
Paneer
Onion
Garlic
G/Chilli
A/Milk
Tag
Eggs
Rice
Bacon Bits
Cheese
Crackers
Apples
C/Seeds
Mint
Oil
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:10, Reply)
MEDIC1111!!!!!!1111!!!!!1111

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:12, Reply)

nee naw nee naw nee naw
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:13, Reply)
was there simpsons where homer says 'lucky drunks' or was that something else

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:21, Reply)
there sure was. AND it falls well within the 'still funny' bracket too. top work, m
frinkiac.com/video/S03E11/WFYYaewijV2SL_TgvqfgUoUuw-0=.gif
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:23, Reply)
hey how do you know if you have enough red hot chilli peppers? give them a weigh, give them a weigh, give them a weigh now

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:33, Reply)
McDonalds targeting the vulnerable.
www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/business/mcdonalds-identifies-potentially-lucrative-bereaved-kid-demographic-20170516127747
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:36, Reply)
it's a terrible advert

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:39, Reply)
I saw it while dozing on the sofa at the weekend.
Thought it was part of a fever dream.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:43, Reply)
I have that feeling about most adverts I see

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:58, Reply)
I'm usually quite good at switching off to them.
/ pretty much everything going on around me.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:01, Reply)
it doesn't matter that kid is adopted anyway

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:42, Reply)
hah, nice

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:37, Reply)
seems more like you'd have
Fennel
Apricots
Garibaldis
Gazpacho
Ovaltine
Tuna
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:12, Reply)
I'm sweating
please stop
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:13, Reply)
have a drink, take your mind off it
media4.giphy.com/media/quotLe44dFYFq/giphy.gif
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:16, Reply)
Good question
1 courgette
Carrots
Onions
Pork shoulder if they have it, but they haven't had it in for weeks
Wholemeal bread flour
Butter
Multivitamin juice
Gin
Yoghurts
Sliced ham and chicken
Fizzy mineral water
Mushrooms
Änything else that takes my fancy
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:17, Reply)
another 5 probably.
Although by then my brain will have fucked off long ago.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:11, Reply)
i'm a bit bored $$.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:58, Reply)
same
nice outside and dull inside
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:59, Reply)
nice contents?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
hell yeah

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
grrrmachine?
www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2017/may/16/venice-biennale-refugee-crisis-nsk-tunisia#comment-98670752
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:00, Reply)
Hannah Ellis-Petersen in Venice
in Venice
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:07, Reply)
helo? yes? what?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:54, Reply)
Just read about the new Apple building in California
It is a massive circle jerk.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:05, Reply)
sounds mental

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
So it doesn't have air con, but the building breathes and can fluctuate between 66/77 f
"We’re asking them to recognize that part of being connected to the outside is knowing what temperature it is. We don’t want you to feel like you’re in a casino. We want you to know what time of day it is, what temperature it is outside. Is the wind really blowing? That was Steve’s original intention, to sort of blur that line between the inside and outside. It sort of wakes up your senses.”

Ie, any thermostat fiddlers or temp whingers, get to fuck. Why not just work in a tent yer pricks
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:13, Reply)
stupid yurtprick. no wonder he's dead.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:18, Reply)
that temperature range is used in most modern buildings, it's not new, most place have comfort cooling not ac anyway

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:20, Reply)
Typical Apple apologist

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:36, Reply)
it's all to do with this lot
www.breeam.com/
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:37, Reply)
apples aren't round though
i bet they were thinking of oranges. oops, what a mistake-a to make-a!
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:11, Reply)
Must've done, californian oranges are a thing I think,.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:12, Reply)
nah mat8, that's raisins

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:14, Reply)
I wonder if anyone's ever got bored/lonely enough to rub one out to the bird on the sunmaid box?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:16, Reply)
Guilty
The worst thing is the stickier raisins.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:18, Reply)
I'm about ready for that sleep now

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:07, Reply)
I was ready for that when I woke up.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
a long sleep
sweet dreams prince x
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:09, Reply)
nah, it was the Eurythmics.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:12, Reply)
Erm....yeah

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:13, Reply)
good

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:17, Reply)
I've got 3 days off and nothing to do on friday.
What do you reckon?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:21, Reply)
protest at a food bank, they are just enabling people

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:22, Reply)
do nothing. it can be quite good.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:23, Reply)
darts all day

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:23, Reply)

d f
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:30, Reply)
guaranteed

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:31, Reply)
read the labour manifesto

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:25, Reply)

labour unabomber
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:27, Reply)
Study the blade.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:27, Reply)
^^^^

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:44, Reply)
Make thermite

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:36, Reply)

the ma
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:42, Reply)
make thermite, think marmite

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:43, Reply)
Dance like no one's watching
Or, dance like Noone is watching
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:43, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/8069364
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:48, Reply)
troll celebrities on twitter all day

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:52, Reply)
Give us a hand on pixelcanvas, turning furtive into a penis

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:27, Reply)
I like how the random quotes have worked out
i.imgur.com/WfY7rUB.jpg
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 16:16, Reply)
are Pacman and Ms Pacman still together?
asking for a friend.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:04, Reply)
Obvious troll is obvious
Their messy divorce is well documented
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
i just thought they were on a break or something...
sad times
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:09, Reply)
Ms Pacman ran off with Q-Bert the cow.
Now Pacman lives in a dingy bedsit, drinks too much and manages a moribund flebsite.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
he's the one who leaves all the lights on, isn't he?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:08, Reply)
'q-bert the cow' had me confused there for a second

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:22, Reply)
They're brother and sister

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:11, Reply)
you're thinking of the white strips...

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:12, Reply)
Are you sure?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:19, Reply)
yeah, are you?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
I was
but I've been proven wrong before
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:22, Reply)
Hey, what about this
The word 'proven'. I pronounce it 'Proo-ven', but I've heard some people pronounce it 'Proh-ven'. Who's right?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:23, Reply)
poovan

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:25, Reply)
really? i don't think i've ever heard it as anything other than proo

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:30, Reply)
REALLY

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:33, Reply)
I pronounce it prow-ven

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:54, Reply)
just use proved instead if it worries you
but not when it is an adjective coming before a noun hahaha!!!
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:49, Reply)
Ha

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:54, Reply)
Proh-ven here

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:56, Reply)
do you look down your nose at the proooven crowd?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:04, Reply)
You say that, but where's the profe?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:20, Reply)
'scone' here

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:03, Reply)
oh come on man, no need

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:04, Reply)
oh shit, sorry fohd addicts

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:05, Reply)
ffs people are trying to reach out and get help

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:07, Reply)
might set up a little retreat in south sudan where there will be no temptation due to no foood

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:16, Reply)
good idea

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:25, Reply)
i was going to call it after the common phrase for giving something up without any assistance but that may well cause more issues

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:27, Reply)
instead of suffering the DT's do you think they suffer the BLT's...oh hahahaha, soz it's not a joking matter, probably get banned now

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:30, Reply)
Gastric banned

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:32, Reply)
Well I guess that keto flu thing is a form of withdrawal isn't it?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:35, Reply)
I wonder what the mortality rate is, untreated dts is 5-25%, must be much higher than that

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:42, Reply)

I knew a twat at university who insisted that the conditional tense had its own pronunciation, viz. "were" was pronounced "wurr" in "You were here yesterday" but "wear" in "If I were you...".
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:09, Reply)
I hate him

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:19, Reply)
Did he ever get the sexeh?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:33, Reply)
I would be very surprised wear that to have ever occurred.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:42, Reply)
hmm... now you've both asked I'm not so sure...
i'm not sure at all.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:22, Reply)
They had an online thing going for a while but Pacman got ghosted.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:11, Reply)
you kids and your slang terms

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:12, Reply)
not sure

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:15, Reply)
:(

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:18, Reply)
He got addicted to the cherries and ended up dead

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:19, Reply)
brutal.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:20, Reply)
another victim of food addiction

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
fucking pushers
www.demeterclarc.com/wp-content/uploads/images/2012/11/SAMPLE.jpg
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:33, Reply)
can you put a trigger warning on this pls

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:38, Reply)
people need to see her face incase she starts selling near kids mate, i'm only trying to help

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:41, Reply)
feel a bit feint looking at that

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:39, Reply)
it'll be all the blood rushing to your wanger.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:42, Reply)
do you have a sponser you could talk too?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:43, Reply)
well they have two kids so i'd hope so
also, you're shit at the internet
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
all of it?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
i can only assume so

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:23, Reply)
i did do a good internet about 3 years ago
but i can't find the link, so you're probably right.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:24, Reply)
two blue kids
makes you think
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:21, Reply)
Inky sits in the corner, looking uncomfortable

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:24, Reply)
I dunno
might punch them both. That's a tenner right there.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:27, Reply)
hold on his baby was yellow in pacland, did he have two families?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:29, Reply)
he looks at the baby, he looks at ms pacman

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:32, Reply)
Wakka wakka wakka wakki

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:23, Reply)
He got diabetic from a high fructose diet
so doctors had to amputate and now he freelances as a pie chart for Powerpoint presentations
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:24, Reply)
that's THE pacman?
how the mighty have fallen.
or if not fallen, at least found steady work.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:25, Reply)
I'VE HAD ORGASMS!
I'VE HAD TONS OF ORGASMS! I'VE HAD ONE WITH YOUR MOM, DUDE!
I WILL STRANGLE YOU! I'LL STICK MY GODDAM THUMB THROUGH YOUR EYE!
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:29, Reply)
^ mark morrison's prison shoes

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:30, Reply)

Another dead heroe :'(
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:48, Reply)
criminy
i'd forgotten how bad the original one actually is: b3ta.com/questions/thattaughtem/post77789
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:08, Reply)
It had rather more replies 4 years later, hmmm

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 15:24, Reply)
i LOVE this song
sing the 2nd verse now
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:32, Reply)
I think probably that the answer is no.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:54, Reply)
well fair enough.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:55, Reply)
I can't be sure.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 14:53, Reply)
I really hope this NHS malware attack hasn't prevented anyone from getting 2 Can's finger up their bumhole. :(

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:44, Reply)
That's not what 'digital' means in that context mate.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:44, Reply)
lol

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:46, Reply)
That really would be a digital intrusion.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:47, Reply)
Dunno mine got hacked the other year

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:50, Reply)
2can has perfected the bum fingering to the point where you'll be sat in the waiting room and barely notice it's even slipped in.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:50, Reply)
I reckon the chairs in the waiting room have got little holes in the seat, and they're in a line all backed onto the shared wall to his office, and there's a series of small hatches in the wall

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:57, Reply)
Um.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:59, Reply)
Glory hole GP surgeries: they're the future.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:02, Reply)
Like the chair the pope has?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:02, Reply)
Papal bull?
Papal balls, more like.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
I think the hole's a bit further forward on that one.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
Papal bull?
Papal balls, more like.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:08, Reply)
I'm glad someone is reading all that shit that I type.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:10, Reply)
You've really blown your sock-puppet's cover now.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:24, Reply)
I suppose that would save me having to offer chaperones, I could just tell them to keep an eye on each other

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 23:57, Reply)
there's a timing concern

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:51, Reply)
My worry is that food addicts might not be getting the life-saving treatment they need :(

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:52, Reply)
^feeder

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:54, Reply)
i feel so sorry for them, everywhere they go they are confronted by foood, not like those lucky alcoholic cunts who can easily avoid booze

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:02, Reply)
It's so hard for them these days
20 years ago, if they were trying to kick their habits they could always hide in a pub, but nowadays you're not even safe there with all this gastropub this and dining menu that. Someone needs to do something.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:06, Reply)
you go into the corner shop for some cheap spirits and super strength lager and what's there right in front of you... sweets

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:07, Reply)
This is a thing now isn't it?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:06, Reply)
we are on your side, i've had a look at rehabs for you but all the main ones deal with alcohol and drugs, i've written to my mp tho, take care and remember..it works if you work it, you're worth it so work it

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:11, Reply)
Thanks hun

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:19, Reply)
^ breatharian

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:09, Reply)
[something about a botnet]

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:06, Reply)
botbot net more like!

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:09, Reply)
lol, rectum

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:11, Reply)
y'know fiverr, yeah?
people charge roughly a five-spot to do... something

gunging
crappy dune-buggy caricatures
complete fucking bullshit

it's all there. what service could YOU offer for a crisp fiver?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:45, Reply)
Cords of attachment?
I'd do a guitar setup for a fiver. Shops charge 30 quid plus, which is a fucking rip off.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:47, Reply)
I wish you lived near me - I'd employ you to do this

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:49, Reply)
I will also accept payment in the form of drugs and/or booze

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:51, Reply)
stop trying to tempt him out of hampshire, you hussy!

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:33, Reply)
Don't think we'll be leaving hampshire just yet
Almost certainly leaving the city though. We can get a lot more for our money if we leave portsea island.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:41, Reply)
yeah, it's quite a drop off in price
you should have done this a while ago, you could have bought my mum's place. a two bedroom bungalow with a small garden is what you need right?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:49, Reply)

? I'd do a guitar setup for a fiver. Shops charge 30 quid plus, which is a fucking rip off is my signature D&D spell
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:49, Reply)
stick them up your arse for £5 more like

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:50, Reply)
Word

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:51, Reply)
*nods* cords of attachment
yesterday, i didn't have my headphones for the walk home and as a result, i had to spend the time... thinking

i ended up wondering what life'd be like if all poos were attached by a cord, like babies are. a bumbilical, if you will (and i know you will)
do you think you'd cut off each one as it emerged or just wait until they're all out and cut all the cords at once?

that question to contestant 3
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:52, Reply)
I'll eat some string and get back to you

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
hero

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:55, Reply)
One of my cats likes eating the tie-strings you get on binbags.
A few hours later he then runs around with several inches of orange plastic string billowing from his arsehole like an aeroplane banner.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:59, Reply)
lol
mine hasn't attempted to eat anything stringy yet, thank god
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:29, Reply)
my housemate pulled a balloon out the dogs bumhole.
She looked quite surprised when it exited and made a snapping noise.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:44, Reply)

and made a snapping noise already shaped like a giraffe
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:53, Reply)
Yay!

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:01, Reply)
This is like that thing where a 'skilled' woman can tie a knot in a cherry stalk with her tongue, but even better

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:02, Reply)
Right, NOW we've got a topic going
I think I'd do them as and when needed. The discomfort caused by waiting would be unbearable.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:01, Reply)
but what if you cut one at the wrong point and ended up with an annoying little bit left not quite poking out that you couldn't shift?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:16, Reply)
yeah, that would be irritating

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:28, Reply)
but what about the feeling of cutting them all loose at once, you'd practically float off the lavvy

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:17, Reply)
yeah, that would be good

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:28, Reply)
tangles and i are the cartoon angel and devil on your shoulder

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:32, Reply)

car p n
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:34, Reply)
ptoo?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 13:43, Reply)
What are the cords attached to?
Would the remainder snap back up your bumhole when the turd was plucked, or would you have to yank it out by the root?
Why did you spend your free time contemplating poo?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:15, Reply)
there would probably be some sort of afterpoo that you'd have to deliver once you'd done the main bit

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:17, Reply)
Doesn't sound very efficient.
I'm out, manolith.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:21, Reply)
i'm not offering it as a solution, duh
this is a what-if scenario
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:30, Reply)
i dunno
usually poo chat is one of my least favourite things on here
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:29, Reply)
Weirdly, it seems to be less offensive than food chat
what a world
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:42, Reply)
surely it's the natural conclusion to food chat

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:53, Reply)
now i understand that this place is like a self help group for foood addicts i pity you all a lot more, and your families and love ones must be struggling to understand why you turned out like this

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:57, Reply)
i'll start a new, non-food thread at any time for a fiver

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:27, Reply)
I'll derail said non-food thread for a fiver

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:32, Reply)
ah, now i see the problem with this business model

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:36, Reply)
i'm not sure foood should be mentioned here at all, what if somebody relapses and dies

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:32, Reply)
I offered 100 words of voiceover for $5
but the real money is on all the upsells. You want it in less than 48hrs? $10. You want exclusive rights? $20. You want to change one word? Re-recording fee.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:47, Reply)
a colleague is setting up a voice over one as we speak and that's all good advice, cheers
he has the advantage of a voice that doesn't make people want to kill themselves, too!
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:31, Reply)
Was going to say that's a good 1-2 hour's work there, but then spotted "for one pencil sketch and one character only"

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:48, Reply)
each one is just a stickman on a post-it note

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
2.5 minutes of high quality beatboxing.
Performed 'au naturel', of course.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:48, Reply)
get a masquerade mask and go for it
i bet you'd get some requests
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:50, Reply)
Oh I get some requests alright

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:01, Reply)
Yeah, they're normally things like "when are you leaving?"
hahaha, no but seriously, you're great.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:02, Reply)
depressing

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:50, Reply)
A sharp intake of breath while looking at a leaking pipe.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:50, Reply)
leaking pipe, eh?
is that why literally everybody here calls you 'dribble'
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:55, Reply)
alright, $$

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:58, Reply)
the Sherlock skillz are weak with that one eh

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:02, Reply)
I've got him on ignore again
Not to antagonise him, not because I'm upset...It's just making me sad.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:04, Reply)
yeah, it's a bit depressing to watch

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:07, Reply)
I took it off ignore for about 2p minutes the other day, it was still aggressive nonsense

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:16, Reply)
Lol, I wish they'd 'all' stop

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:04, Reply)
Getting to that age, eh?
I feel you, m8
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:04, Reply)
lol

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)
punch a child

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:51, Reply)
Hahaha
Do I get to pick the child?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:52, Reply)
yep

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:53, Reply)
I'm in

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:02, Reply)
Watch starps fitted while u wait

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:56, Reply)
And what do you do for the other 4 minutes?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:25, Reply)
this kind of 'race to the bottom' capitalism makes me want to vote for Corbyn

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 10:57, Reply)
lol, "bottom"

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:07, Reply)
whatever it takes

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:16, Reply)
I'd rip someone's inbox

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:12, Reply)
I'd make a low poly 3D model maybe
Limited to 500 polys and flat materials. Textures and additional polys available for a premium and you need to supply a basic sketch or description (preferably both) of the model
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:16, Reply)
Just make the tea eh teaboy

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:17, Reply)
like I could be arsed doing that
What do you take me for?
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:33, Reply)

b3ta.com/board/4227264
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:42, Reply)
rip schnurrr

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:59, Reply)
lol, ahhh I forgot about that incredible meltdown

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:02, Reply)
you could get 32k for that!

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:34, Reply)
I reckon my skills are worth at least six or seven quid

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:20, Reply)
do you accept diseased octopi?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:26, Reply)
well then good news! you can set your own price

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:34, Reply)
Edit some audio, max 15 minutes for that price
Or give advice on how to improve your podcast

"Make it less shit"
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:22, Reply)
I paid a bloke $20 for something similar
it was $5 for him to EQ my voice to make it sound less shit, and $15 for him to tell me what he did so I could do it myself next time.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:25, Reply)
"I used the Pro-Tool setting "Make a white man sound less shit" and didn't totally Cher you"
But seriously, wouldn't mind getting into a podcast solutions business of some sort. May do some research on this...
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:30, Reply)
dunno how lucrative it could be, most podcasts have zero cash to spend on anything
I did voiceovers for youtube channels, and that was alright as long as those vids were earning ad revenue, but as soon as that dried up so did the work. I miss being Tim from Germany :(
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:34, Reply)
Oh it wouldn't be lucrative
The google search confirms so.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:10, Reply)
£5 for a go on my tits.
But there would be a lot of small print.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:23, Reply)
There is small print on your tits?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:31, Reply)
he wears a newspaper brassiere

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:37, Reply)
Complete Bible tattoos are the worst

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:33, Reply)
Prostate exam with no talking

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:26, Reply)
eye contact?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:28, Reply)
no
For an extra 10 quid I can put a mirror in front of them.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:41, Reply)
what age should we start getting our bumholes fingered? i'm 43 and it's not been suggested yet

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:45, Reply)
now

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:52, Reply)
i mean as a medical thing you cheeky scamp

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:53, Reply)
Unless there's a strong family history of prostate cancer or you have any worrying symptoms there's no reason to under 50, and after that we'd tend to only do it for urinary symptoms and a few other things.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:58, Reply)
Oh , best I take up scouse on his offer

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:05, Reply)
if I have to wear gloves it will cost more

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:08, Reply)
It did for my granddad so I'd better start earlier too.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:08, Reply)
I'd be the best gosh-darn buddy you've ever had!
For the first 3 minutes, £5 a minute thereafter
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:28, Reply)
this one is cheaper and a bird:
www.fiverr.com/faith_akano/chat-with-you-and-be-your-true-friend-for-20-minutes
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:32, Reply)
doesn't do vulgar or sex chat though

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:33, Reply)
or anal

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:40, Reply)
look at the picture of Zee_logos
he looks like a North Korean government official
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:53, Reply)
The starting point of all achievments is desire

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:24, Reply)
even xbox achievements

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:37, Reply)
+bum

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:06, Reply)
Shit on a newspaper.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:45, Reply)
say you'll do it with a front page photo of a disliked politician/celebrity and that'll probably make some money, yeah

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:53, Reply)
i think there's a subreddit where people post pictures of photos of people they've printed off and spunked on.
I don't know why.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:08, Reply)
Talking of newspapers
Well done on the Daily Telegraph and Mail hunting down the guy who found the backdoor URL to stop the global hack attack, publishing his name and photo, and writing a paragraph on how much he loves pizza.

What massive fucking clickbait pricks they are.
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:12, Reply)
jeremy corbyn/theresa may face swap

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 11:59, Reply)
what, in real life?
that's gotta be worth more than a fiver
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:07, Reply)
i'll charge £3000 for a 12 hours swap

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:16, Reply)
I'd put your CDs or records in alphabetical order*
*maximum 100 units
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:07, Reply)
propose to a whore

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:18, Reply)
george michael's leszzzzz

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:24, Reply)
This is sad. I hate it

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:18, Reply)
hate it for a fiver?

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:20, Reply)
I'll give you a fiver to pretend you like it

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:22, Reply)

kotaku.com/disney-drops-pewdiepie-over-anti-semitic-jokes-1792324412
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:29, Reply)
I am the lord of the edge, said he

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:33, Reply)
It's strange to have one black friend and not be constantly talking about it.

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:34, Reply)
heh

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:37, Reply)
*bums*

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:26, Reply)
for five quid? bargain

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:27, Reply)
Depends if that's a noun or a verb

(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:39, Reply)
I'd identify you as someone famous at a comically appropriate moment
AICMFP
(, Tue 16 May 2017, 12:42, Reply)

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