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# WILL YOU COME TO THE PARTY IT IS IN MY PANTS I HOPE YOU CAN MAKE IT IN MY PANTS
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 2:29, archived)
# last time i got there really early
and you were still, like, setting out snacks on these white lace things and making sure there were enough coasters near all the tables, and i sort of stood in the doorway for a minute, holding the casserole i brought, and you, like, looked up from the throw pillow you were straightening, and were, like, real inviting, but still i could tell, like i was too early. and then we both sort of stood around, like, leaning on the edges of cabinets and stuff trying to appear casual waiting for everyone else to get there.
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 3:23, archived)
# and the small-talk
christ, the small-talk. i remember, i was leaning there, sort of drumming my fingers on the counter next to this decorative salad bowl, and you were sort of, like, leaning over the sink, looking up and out the window, like maaaaaybe there might be something out there that was new that you were looking at, and then we both said, "what?" at exactly the same time, even though neither of us had said anything. i mean, it's one thing for one person to say that, but BOTH? shit was weird.
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 3:33, archived)
# I let my pants do the talking
and they were like, what?
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 3:35, archived)
# it's a good thing you responded, man
i was thoroughly prepared to go on describing the awkward scene all night.
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 3:48, archived)
# MY ROMANCE STYLE IS: AWKWARD
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 4:34, archived)
# and then there was this loooong pause
and finally i was like, "is this... this tile pattern, is this new?" and you were like, "uh, nope. just mopped it. i know- yeah, i know, it used to be really dirty, right? so... so now i mopped it and it looks like a new floor!" but you said it sort of, like, with a little too much enthusiasm, and then i sort of nodded, and you sort of nodded too, and let out a slow breath, and i sort of, like, looked away and so did you, and then you lifted up the blue towel next to the sink that the dishes dry on and sort of, like, smudged your finger around under it, like maybe there was some grime under there you'd been meaning to clean up. and i sort of, like, made one of those clicking sounds with my tongue and nodded and looked at the decorative ceramic sugar pot you had.

and i said, "so... umm... the humidity, it really, uh, gets to that sugar, huh?"

and you were like, "yep, yep," nodding, even though, i found out later, the sugar thing was empty and you really hadn't been quite sure exactly what i had said.
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 3:39, archived)
# schnurr!!
hey hey hope all's well with you my man
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 4:30, archived)
# yeah I hate it in summer when your meth gets all stuck together in a big rock and you just have to cook that shit up and shoot it
(, Tue 10 Aug 2010, 4:34, archived)