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# 'I like this'
Spent a most entertaining afternoon the other day reading posts by cyclists explaining why they should not only be allowed to jump red lights, but also how if they hit a pedestrian it's the pedestrian's fault in the first place. I'd quite happily crush the entire lot beneath articulated tank treads, then reverse over their twitching, lycra-clad bodies.

Incidentally, cyclist hatred seems very fashionable these days. Isn't it about time you switched sides?
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:19, archived)
# Does it help that I used to be a cyclist until I got run over by a tank?
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:20, archived)
# I ride my bike far more often than I drive, as I don't have a car
...which means nothing to these people. As soon as you make the slightest suggestion that they should take some sort of responsibility for hurtling around on an oversized child's toy, they scream bloody murder: "Car drivers are mean! Cabbies are mean! White van drivers try to kill us on a daily basis! Therefore we should have carte blanche to run down pedestrians as we like, because cycling is the greenest form of transport!"

/argument condensed for the sake of clarity
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:27, archived)
# Indeed. If you can't hack the behaviour of other road users
Don't use it.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:28, archived)
# No no no, you just don't understand
Car, van and lorry drivers make the road unsafe for cyclists, that's why they have to jump red lights and make crossings unsafe for pedestrians

It's their god-given right. Because cycling is green.
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:34, archived)
# One of the tossers actually called me a cunt cos I was waiting at a red light
Grrr!
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:29, archived)
# While using a pelican crossing on the green man this morning
I still had to dodge some dippy bint who was far too important to stop at a red light

Though of course that would be my fault, for having the temerity to be a pedestrian
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:31, archived)
# Clothes line em!
(I helped save b3ta! Monsieur Monster I heard Seriously talk the first time. in here., Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:34, archived)
# If the weather had been "changeable"
I would have had my trusty long umbrella with me, which is perfect for spokes

Sadly it was nice and sunny today, so I only had a pair of shades :(
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:36, archived)
# Playing cards in the spokes on me BMX were good...
Try playing cards to the FACE
(I helped save b3ta! Monsieur Monster I heard Seriously talk the first time. in here., Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:42, archived)
# I used to have playing card on the spokes of my bike.
* Brrroooooommmmm....

I also use to lean out of the passenger window of my mates car and give cyclists a dead leg as we drove past...

^ True story
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:51, archived)
# Seen this one?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=81oPQ4TZLEQ&feature=related
(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 15:52, archived)
# No that's going to hurt in the morning...
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 15:56, archived)
# Coke can to the back of the head.
Preferrably full.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:33, archived)
# i cycled for ages in london
while at college there, i only ever had one incident of a car being idiotic.

i also had a ticket from a police man for standing on my pedal and scooting my bike along the pavement outside liverpool street station.

the cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:43, archived)
# I get to cycle across Archway junction
which has to be about the most dangerous bit of road for a cyclist within the M25, but I find as long as you've got a sense of awareness and you signal clearly to the other traffic, even white vans will let you through when you need to change lanes.

You were well unlucky to get a cycling ticket though, that's almost unheard of. My missus got stopped by a copper for jumping a red light a while back, but she just cried at him until he let her off
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:50, archived)
# They're busting cyclists quite a lot in central, because cyclists are a bunch of absolute wankers.
I actually heard one protesting at a copper the other day "Oh come on it's not like it's a real crime, is it?!" the twat.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:56, archived)
# i paid the fine
and wrote a letter of complaint to his commanding officer stating that the ticket clearly indicated that it was a motoring vehicle ticket and that i thought the officers actions were heavy handed and over the top and lodged an official complaint against the officer.

i never did get the fine back, but hopefully pissed fo the officer and any promotion that he may have been up for.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 15:12, archived)
# As long as it stopped you cycling on a pedestrian area, or jumping red lights, then it's OK.
What the name of the type of ticket was is irrelevent.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 15:19, archived)
# ^ What she said
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Wed 20 Apr 2011, 14:47, archived)