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# ^this
got an emo niece who just trashed her own birthday cake and wrote about it on fb, saying how much she hated everything. i replied 'stop acting a twat or i'll come round there and kick you up the arse.'
soon stopped her moaning!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 14:52, archived)
# good advice too
family means noone gets left behind when the hurting begins =)
(macroscian (1 like), Sun 18 Aug 2013, 15:03, archived)
# i just freaked her out in asda
by picking up a whole salmon and saying "ooo, look at the fishie! poor fishie! stroke the poor fishie. STROKE IT!"
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 15:13, archived)
# Hahaha
laugh out loud moment there
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 15:26, archived)
# i love playing supermarket nutter
it winds her right up
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 15:33, archived)
# haha, quite awesome
(macroscian (1 like), Sun 18 Aug 2013, 16:09, archived)
# i may have gone a bit far
when i told the store detective to stroke my potatoes
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 16:28, archived)
# Auntie Smashy, newspaper advice columnist and arse-kicker
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 15:45, archived)
# i'm everybody's crying shoulder
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 18 Aug 2013, 15:48, archived)