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# Awww
Woke up this morning feeling reaaaally miserable (don't ask :), had a long bath while feeling reeeeeallly miserable, came online, looked at all the stuff posted here while I was asleep, and now I'm happy...

Thanks B3ta :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:10, archived)
# Yay ! cheer up you.
guess what, someones making me breakfast - i just looked round, and it was literally on fire.
things could be worse.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:15, archived)
# Crikey!
And all they had to do was pour some Kellogg's Pep into a bowl and add milk :)

I wish I could burn cereal. That would be a real party trick.

My mum burnt jelly once, you know :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:30, archived)
# blimey. how did she do that?
we had a day of sweet making once, and made turkish delight. I think we must've burnt that. when it was done the only way we could cut it was with a small hacksaw. We tried to pretend it was nice, but we were fooling no one.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:32, archived)
# Well
she devised this method of making jelly involving a saucepan. Apparently it was much quicker and easier, and gave perfect results... except when someone arrives at the door and you leave it on the hob :)

Speaking of culinary disasters, many years ago I was in a cooking lesson at school, and we were making flapjacks. Unfortunately, my friend Luke and I both somehow forgot to bring sugar! Instead of just asking the teacher, we decided to go and look for some in the cupboards. We found a jar of what looked like sugar, and without trying it, we just put it in the recipe.

Needless to say, salty flapjacks taste fowl! But on the other hand, they do sound rude :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:38, archived)
# arf!
ocasionally my mum used to forget the salt when she made bread. Putting salt and then jam on bread is weird.
Rather sadly we asked her why she doesn't make bread now. She said "no one seems to eat it any more". I asked her if she'd realised we all left home about 10 years ago...
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:42, archived)
# Aww she's not going
mad is she?

Other peoples mad relatives are hilarous, but its a little bit more sad when you knew them sane :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:50, archived)
# sheesh! Noo,
she's not mad. To tell you the truth i think she doesn't make bread any more because it's a pain in the arse.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:53, archived)
# I know for a fact
thats why my mum doesn't make bread any more, because if you ask her why she doesn't make bread any more, she says "Christ no! It takes all bloody day!"

She did get a breadmaker thingy but it made crap bread, so it got put in the cupboard :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:55, archived)
# i don't believe
anyone that says thay have one of those and actually use it. they make bread in a bucket!
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 8:09, archived)
# Well
after a couple of weeks my mum got the knack of making fairly nice bread with it, but the fact is its not as nice as proper home made bread, the loaves are tiny, and its still not as convenient as just going down the shop and buying the stuff ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 8:12, archived)
# burnt jelly sounds tastier
than it should. perhaps i should try frying some...
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:33, archived)
# If you're going to fry jelly
save me some, I'd like to know how it tastes. Oh, and olive oil is probably going to be better.
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:56, archived)
# If either of you actually fry
Jelly, we want pictures of all stages of preperation, and a detailed description of the final products odour, flavour and texture :)
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 8:06, archived)
# Lumpbucket
You could pop round as 1st witness, call an ambulance perhaps when I'm peeling molten jelly from my eyes.
I'll bloody do it though.
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 8:39, archived)
# .
Just doing our jobs :-)

Or not, in my case.
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Sat 9 Mar 2002, 7:17, archived)