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# so my alcoholic flatmate
is sat at home, sending nasty text messages out to my friends using my phone, drinking my beer. i come home after working since 12 and he says lets go out. i say, not yet.
WELL FUCK OFF AND DIE says he.
piss off say I
why are you in such a cuntish mood he replies.
because your a twat i retort.

hence i am pissed off. someone make me laugh. make me laugh with a joke. a joke thats nasty. a joke that is so offensive you will have to change your log in name so people don't want to kill you over cyberspace.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:03, archived)
# Have
you punched him yet?

Maybe a game of Roshambo?
(I helped save b3ta! 4838 Let the man go through, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:06, archived)
# i am really really shit
at hitting people. and he could hit me back, and would then use it to piss me off even further. he has no qualms about trying to beat me up in my sleep.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:07, archived)
# beating you up in your sleep is one thing
i haven't heard what he does to you in your sleep called 'beating up' before.
(I helped save b3ta! trashcanglam, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:11, archived)
# stop right there
now.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:13, archived)
# WILD WILD WEST

What you are looking at Sir is a barometer of what is 'funny' and what is 'not funny'. I'll leave you in bewilderment until Chaotic_Illuminator finds a suitable B3ta Dictionary definition (for a tenner wager, no less)
(I helped save b3ta! trashcanglam, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:07, archived)
# thats very funny
probably because its will smith, but he's white! ha ha ha, oh.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:08, archived)
# here's something else...
(I helped save b3ta! vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:09, archived)
# that's
class.
(I helped save b3ta! trashcanglam, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:10, archived)
# I love swearing
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:10, archived)
# nope
that's precisely why it's NOT funny.

(Chaotic? are you there?)
(I helped save b3ta! trashcanglam, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:09, archived)
# what is REALLY funny
is that he's got Pete Townshend's skin. hahaha. god bless the clone brush. but this is all beside the point.
(I helped save b3ta! trashcanglam, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:12, archived)
# move out
the end

/voice of experience
(I helped save b3ta! curry monster, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:09, archived)
# Poor you..
..here s a penguin cheer you up:
(I helped save b3ta! sick_boy, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:09, archived)
# that penguin
is ace.
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 21:15, archived)