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This is a normal post I never got so bad as to seriously consider killing myself,
I just wanted my life to stop being terrible. And it was terrible. I was never convinced it was only something wrong with my brain, but my doc just put me on one sort of pills after another as if eventually we'd find the right one that would magically stop me from being a social outcast. It made me feel dismissed, this assumption that my feelings were only down to bad chemicals, maybe for some people that is the case but just as happy people can't understand that there can be something wrong with your thinking, doctors don't seem to get that there can be something wrong with your experiences. They are trained to imagine you as a machine, I guess.
 (I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:02, Reply)
This is a normal post circumstances don't help.
www.b3ta.com/questions/letterstheywillneverread/post658138
 (I helped save b3ta! TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:21, Reply)
This is a normal post I don't get what you are telling me here,
this reads like a circumstance, and not a chemical. Sadly, this circumstance is in the past and therefore not liable to change, although perhaps you can change your interpretation of it.

Nevertheless, I'm not saying that chemicals are never the problem, and circumstances always are, I'm saying that circumstances were my problem, and there is not a one-size-fits-all solution to every case of depression. Some people do get wonky brain chemistry. Other people get dealt a genuinely shit hand now and then.
 (I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:27, Reply)
This is a normal post And that was a genuinely shit hand that you got dealt right there,
but it really wasn't your fault, as much as you feel that it was the consequence of your decision, no reasonable person could possibly expect you to have foreseen it.
 (I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:44, Reply)
This is a normal post Sorry to hear that Sundae
That's something no one should feel responsibility for, especially from the age of 15. Hope you're working through it?
 (I helped save b3ta! Jorvic, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:34, Reply)
This is a normal post Long time ago now.
But I feel it, most days. Sometimes for 20 seconds, sometimes longer.
 (I helped save b3ta! TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:46, Reply)
This is a normal post I suppose it boils down to the nature nurture thing?
I think certainly people can be genetically predisposed to depression (there's a family history of it with me, and I cant think of any experiences per say that could have caused it) but also I think someone's experiences definitely can be a major if not all encompassing factor, which is possibly where CBT can be most effective?

Back when I did Psychology AS level there was a good explanation of another way of seeing the nature nurture argument. With Autism it was argued that its a bit like seed which needs the right conditions to grow? So someone could be genetically predisposed towards autism but it would require certain experiences (I'd imagine difficult to avoid or define experiences) for that predisposition to develop into autism?

I'm sorry to hear that your experience with your doctor left you feeling that way? I guess there are as many types of depression as there are people, there's no Haynes manual for the mind. GPs obviously have to know a certain amount about a lot, which is why there needs to be more mental health care provision so they can refer patients to more specialist diagnosis?
 (I helped save b3ta! Jorvic, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:25, Reply)
This is a normal post I imagine that each side can induce the other,
futile circumstances disturb your brain chemistry, and brain chemistry makes your circumstances seem more futile than they really are. Perhaps when this happens it doesn't matter so much which one came first as long as you can break the cycle, but if the original cause is still there when you come off the meds, you'll only end up back on them again.

I had to practically beg to be referred to a specialist, and then I was on a waiting list for months, and eventually my therapist was bloody useless.

What I really needed was some kind of coaching in my social skills, because basically I've been bullied since I started school with jam jar glasses and a funny accent, was too intellectual for my own popularity at a rough state comprehensive, and then wound up in a university with a seeming public-school educated majority. As a result I ended up finding it difficult to relate to people face-to-face.
 (I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sun 6 Mar 2011, 18:38, Reply)
This is a normal post I think what you were talking about is the difference between reactive depression and clinical depression
The two can overlap but anti-depressants are only really effective for clinical depression.
 (I helped save b3ta! Sheriff John Bunnell https://twitter.com/thewonderfulgam, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 0:18, Reply)