Abusing freebiesA friend of mine recently attended a 'Champaign Lunch', where he was compelled drink as much fizzy stuff as he could between the first and last courses. In an ideal world we'd ask restaurant staff to tell us stories about fatties stuffing themselves at All You Can Eat places, but we recognise that our members don't all work in the catering trade, so for the rest of you - tell us something about abusing freebies. BTW: Bee puns = you fail.
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lizard, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 14:16)
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Media freebie at a big London gallery.The boss didn't recognise the PR company hosting it, so gave the invites to the trainee reporters. Turns out the agency in question represented MPs, dignitaries and suchlike, and really didn't intend to invite anyone from our tinpot little publication in the first place.
Drunk doesn't even begin to describe it. Long story short, I knock a six-foot-tall flower vase over Virginia Bottomley. My colleague then gets into a fist fight with the Champagne waiter and ends up flailing into the string quartet's cello player. Judging this a wizard way to meet women, he starts launching himself hands-first at every other female in the room.
Our hosts soon decide it's time for him to leave -- something he refuses to do until he finds where I've disappeared to. This stalemate is eventually broken when the boss of the PR firm chances upon me in the car park, giving a knee-trembler to one of the junior executives.
Even after an official apology, we were never asked back.
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0% Interest Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More, Fri 9 Nov 2007, 1:17,
2 replies)
Whatis a knee trembler?
(, Sun 11 Nov 2007, 19:50, closed)
Whatis a knee trembler?
Oh. Whoops. Never mind, I looked it up.
(, Sun 11 Nov 2007, 19:51, closed)
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