Once upon a time...
when I was a young lad, I was roaming around Northampton town centre. Me and a friend, Sean, were doing the usual pastimes of chasing the deformed pigeons, eating McDonalds and slowly bankrupting Woolworths with our slow burning Pic n Mix heist.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, strangers offering sweets approached us. After working out their intentions weren't to kidnap us, we discovered that they were filming an advert for the 'NEW IMPROVED' Lion bars. Which, were my favourite chocolate bar. I've always been fond of really chewy, sticky chocolate, so even hours after it's been eaten, you can still find bits of nougat in your teeth to prolong the chocolatey goodness. Lion bars are king of this category.

So, after loading our pockets full of mini Lion bars, as bribery for our cooperation, they told us to get in the van asked if we could say it's really nice and so much better than before. For all we could tell, it tasted exactly the fucking same, but with the potential of getting given more chocolate from these generous strangers we threw ourselves into our new found roles as advertising masterminds.

Minds ready, we stood there, in front of the cameras and a now gathering audience of Market Square shoppers already planning our ascent to stardom... This advert was a platform to Hollywood. And then, just as they start the countdown, with a final mouthful of Lion bar getting chomped down, Sean whispers to me, in a voice only loud enough for me to hear...

"tastes like shit, doesn't it?"

And of course, being a young adolescent, this was the wittiest thing I had ever heard. Cue me breaking down into tears of laughter, whilst drooling chocolate over the giant microphone stuck under our noses, trying to force out "Ttthhhee nooo LLjjion burr isshhhh weealy vewy niccsshh" through my stuffed gob. Must have thought I was mental.

Surprisingly, we didn't make the final cut. It was a bunch of clean cut Northamptonians who could speak without dribbling brown. Squares.

That's the closest I've ever come to being in an advert. Also, one of my mates was on the back of an action man box when he was little.

And if this doesn't suffice, the old Honda advert that was like awesome Mousetrap was the best advert on TV
( the pink chicken sniffer sniffs pink chickens., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:13, 7 replies)

*Clickedy Click"
For 3 reasons.
1)Lion bars(they were awesome)
2)Woolworths pick and mix (brought back a lot of memories)
3)Story made me laugh out loud...well more of a slight snigger but still..
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:25, closed)

Thanks!
I normally get stuck writing answers to QOTW, not because I don't have a story, but because I don't think I can write it in a funny way!

And a snigger is at least a start!
( the pink chicken sniffer sniffs pink chickens., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:27, closed)

I admire the fact
that you have actually written a story and not just posted a youtube link!
(specialbrew, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:37, closed)

Cheers!
Although, even if there was a video of me dribbling chocolate and gurning lion bars from my face, I'm not certain I would have posted it anyway!
( the pink chicken sniffer sniffs pink chickens., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:56, closed)

Like!

What a claim to almost fame!
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:33, closed)

I know!
I'll be on that Celebrity Jungle thing next, I think I'm about famous enough!
( the pink chicken sniffer sniffs pink chickens., Fri 16 Apr 2010, 13:56, closed)

Nicely told..
Lion bars, Market Square and Pick N' Mix theft. The three elements of a compelling story.
(wuckfit Dulce et decorum est Pro patria mori., Sat 17 Apr 2010, 1:09, closed)