Hey! Wanker! Leave That Language Alone.
I have a colossal hatred of adverts which attempt to plant new catchphrases into the already-shitty-enough English language. As last week's QOTW illustrated perfectly, we're up to our necks as it is in management bullshit and celebrity-magazine bollocks like 'Going Forward' and 'Brangelina'; We don't need some cock-pipe in advertising adding to the festering pile by encouraging the same gaping morons to quack "Uh-hur-hur-hur, shake your Tictacs!*" and "Should've gone to Specsavers!"

Spurred on by the success of 'Does What it Says on the Tin', it seems that advertisers are determined to plant their own flag in the country's collective vocabulary. We're not meant to say "Fuck this, let's go down the pub" any more; We're supposed to grunt "Hut?" No longer do we stare into an empty fridge and groan at the prospect of yet another bowl of bloody pasta; We apparently rejoice at the arrival of Dolmio Day.

Do I have a point? No, it's just the way these trousers hang, but there's something both tiresome and irritating about seeing a series of adverts attempting to hammer a phrase into our consciences with increasing desperation, like a 20-stone man forcing one more chicken nugget into his all-you-can-eat trough. I want less of that and more PG Tips Monkey.

*I'd like to thank the British public for refusing to adopt this particular lump of crap into their speech. Thanks!
(costas, Tue 20 Apr 2010, 11:12, 6 replies)

Sounds like someone needs a break.
And whereever there's a break ...
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 20 Apr 2010, 11:16, closed)

Should have gone to Specsavers
is a product of genius not usually seen in adverts. The introduction of an insult to be used towards anyone with bad eyesight and/or has a questionable taste in glasses.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 20 Apr 2010, 11:16, closed)

Most annoying one..
Is when they tried to rebrand Southern Comfort as SoCo, and had all these poeple in the advert ordering "SoCo and coke!". God FUCK OFF!

Advertising cunts.
(Burt Burt, Tue 20 Apr 2010, 13:45, closed)

Yes!
That's exactly what I'm talking about. Like Tictacs, I'm willing to put money on nobody ever actually using the word 'Soco' to describe it, unless they were either
a) doing an impression of a wanker, or
b) a wanker.
(costas, Tue 20 Apr 2010, 13:50, closed)

See this is what worries me..
Do you think people actually start saying and doing these things? Just because a wanker bunch of Ad Execs told them to?

I have actually seen people giving other people "doughnuts" on the beach, and referring to them as this, which are from those god awful "hey men, alcopops are cool" WKD ads. Twunts.
(Burt Burt, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 16:02, closed)

HEY! DICKHEAD!! LEAVE OUR WORDS ALONE!!
Sorry, couldn't resist amending that slightly.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 20 Apr 2010, 14:59, closed)