Big Dog
So there I was, one fine sunny afternoon, roped into cutting my parents hedge (basturds!), I was standing on an old, rickity ladder trimming the very top of the hedge when I heard someone yell "come here boy!" followed by a friendly bark, I turn my head and I spot down the road the biggest dog I have seen in my life running right at me, this distance between us was closing rapidly, me, awkardly balanced on on old ladder and this half dog half bear half friggin mountain of a beast bearing down on me at high speed.

I did what any sane person would do and jumped off that ladder pretty darn quickly, twisting my ankle in the process, this dog come rushing up to me and.....

gives me a sniff and a leg brush (almost knocking me over) and then investigating the freshly cut private until he found a piece that he couldn;t swallow whole (about twice the size of my hand), he then lifted his leg and releaved himself. Boats could of set sail in the stream he left behind, on the privit I was going to have to pickup later.

Finaly the owner comes over and apologieses for his dog, turns out it's a Newfoundland(size reference) and despite reaching my waist (I'm 6'3") he was only a 6 month puppy.

Just then a kid came skating down the raod, Newfoundland runs over to him to say hi and the kids absolutley craps it, screaming and trying to run from a puppy that almost reached his shoulders.

Well I found it funny.
( Crap Little Monkey Deathstar, so good they built it twice, Thu 24 Apr 2008, 16:16, 2 replies)

A Newfie!
They're great!

A friend of mine had one called "Chieftain", bloody lovely dog.

He got randy one day and mounted my friend, but such was Chieftain's size he put one paw on each shoulder and looked my unfortunate friend in the eye while he had his dastardly way.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 24 Apr 2008, 16:22, closed)

So
you were trimming your parents bush?
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Thu 24 Apr 2008, 16:34, closed)