Horsephobia
I have always been absolutely terrified of these beats. They're huge, smelly and go on "oh-my-fucking-god-get-out-of-the-way!" rampages for no particular reason.

I really don't understand the love some have for them. My ex took this love to a whole new level and even coached the handicapped (children, not horses) on how to ride nature's motorbike. One time, while demonstrating, the horse she was riding went totally apeshit for no reason other than it's a horse. She was almost paralysed as the horse rammed her full force into a metal fence...yet she still works with them to this very day and blames the incident on herself.

Now if it was me I'd have crept into its stable in the dark of night, snuck up behind it while it was in the wonderful land of nod and...

BAM! Baseball bat to the back of the head!*







*This incident may or may not have been attempted.
(JC_Green Lacks humour, Sat 26 Apr 2008, 13:34, 5 replies)

horses
are genetically predisposed towards complete insanity.
i do not like them.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 26 Apr 2008, 14:00, closed)

horse sense
nah, I've known horses with more sense than people, and when it's going well, there's nothing like it. When it goes wrong, however... my "favourite" riding memory involves a horse that decided to take a corner without telling me, so I just carried on straight... tuck and roll, tuck and roll...
( bnt what, me worry?, Sat 26 Apr 2008, 23:37, closed)

I don't understand horses
They're big, fast and strong, yet they're also likely to panic at the drop of a hat.

If I ever see any horses when I'm driving, I'll slow right down, only overtake when it's safe to do so and give them plenty of room. However, I don't think they should be allowed on today's roads. I wouldn't be allowed to take a motor vehicle on the roads under the age of 16, let alone a vehicle that's likely to panic and do something daft.
(hagis_uk, Sun 27 Apr 2008, 8:00, closed)

So wait...
...you've seen horses driving?
(JC_Green Lacks humour, Sun 27 Apr 2008, 20:47, closed)

Yes. And they tow caravans. Bastards.
(hagis_uk, Mon 28 Apr 2008, 0:11, closed)