Cycling helmet
Went for a wee when out camping. Just putting the old fellow away again when I got an almighty pain on the end. Assuming I'd zipped up my fly without due care and attention, I carefully unzipped it and had a look. What should I see but an enormous black beetle, chomping away on the end of my cock looking like a big cycling helmet.

'AAAARGH!', I say succinctly, brushing the fucker off. And then I searched for it for it the grass and couldn't even find it to stamp on.

Had to go straight off for a wank to make sure everything was still working properly.
( flatfrog Staring vacantly into space, Mon 28 Apr 2008, 9:45, 3 replies)

Oh, and a quick link
Nothing to do with the story, but I didn't want to post a link in the main qotw board. For anyone that has never read the classic thread on the dogs and the elk... tabletalk.salon.com/webx?14@@.ee90352/1317
( flatfrog Staring vacantly into space, Mon 28 Apr 2008, 9:51, closed)

to make sure everything was still working properly
because I was so aroused by the beetle.

Had to be done. :D
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 28 Apr 2008, 11:36, closed)

Well
I have to admit, it was a pretty sexy beetle. Much more John than Ringo
( flatfrog Staring vacantly into space, Tue 29 Apr 2008, 9:37, closed)