Directions
Being a man, I do all the driving when me and the wife go anywhere. The problem with this is that it means the missus is in charge of directions. She has a couple of annoying habits when it comes to giving directions.

1) "Go left at these lights... why are you in this lane? I meant right! You know I meant right"
2) The assumption that I know every street name in the country, so we'll be approaching a junction and she'll say "go onto Kings Road" to which I'll reply "which way is that?" and she'll repeat "Kings Road!" just a little bit louder and slower.
3) The concept of "up" as a direction when driving. Normally at a roundabout. "Going up" at a roundabout has, on various occasions, mean left, right and straight on.
4) She seems to think we are both psychic, so she only needs to think about which way we need to go and I'll head that way. "Why didn't you turn right at that road back there?" "Because you didn't tell em to" "but we need to go that way..."
%) The fact she always holds the map so north is at the top, but gets consistantly confused if we are heading south and tells me to turn the wrong way. She gets annoyed when I say "are you sure you mean left?"
(ScousersPet, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 10:02, 5 replies)

I solve this problem
by driving and navigating.
( M3rx likes the Asian ladies, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 10:23, closed)

Get a sat-nav?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 10:44, closed)

Get a blowjob and just cruise around in circles
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 11:07, closed)

Mrs SLVA is good at map reading
but assumes I know the scale of the map.

"You need the third left"
"How far is it?"
"About an inch or so"

But, she can calculate directions on the fly like a SatNav if we leave the motorway a junction early because of a lane closure or something.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 11:33, closed)

Not limited to women
My boyfriend is generally brilliant at navigating except for one very vital thing: he does not know left from right.

When we're driving somewhere I have to keep an eye on him while he's giving directions as he will say "at the traffic lights turn right" but will be pointing left. I have learnt to ignore the voice and watch the hands

He is generally a very intelligent, erudite and knowledgeable man but just missed this vital piece of information.
(BearWithLittleBrain, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 12:21, closed)