Revenge
Must have been about 1995, I was a skint layabout so didn't have direct debits set up to pay the bills, used to pay them as and when I could afford to and when they had red writing on them.

My bank whose name rhymes with Scabby Rationale allowed customers to pay their bills at the local branch which I did as there was not normally a queue unlike at the post office where you'd spend the best part of 30 minutes waiting amongst the ummm people.

I presented my electricity bill and £45 (those were the days) at the counter. The woman who served me seemed somewhat put out by this and also grumbled at me when I enquired about my balance "Can't you use the cashpoint" she said. Anyway, she took the money, stamped my bill and handed it back to me.

A couple of weeks pass when I get a letter from the electricity company demanding instant payment of the £25 that I apparently owed them. I rang them and told them that I had paid the bill and they informed me that I had only paid £20. I argued with them but they said that's what Scabby Rationale had paid them and to take it up with the bank.

So I went into my local branch armed with the original bill and spoke to the manageress. Have you ever tried to reason with someone who is incapable of logical thought?

Me: Here is the bill, it is stamped, this proves that I paid the full amount.
She: But our till role shows that you only paid £20.
Me: If I had paid £20, that would be written on the bill.
She: Exactly.
Me: Exactly what?
She: It doesn't say that you paid the full amount.
Me: It doesn't say that I paid £20.
She: Exactly.
Me: Eh?

This was a lost cause so I photocopied the bill and sent that with a letter to head office. A few days later I received a telephone call from someone at head office and had almost exactly the same conversation that I had had with the branch manager.

I gave up.

My mother, on the other hand, incensed by the injustice of it all wrote to the bank on my behalf and I did receive a very nice letter from the chairman saying that there was nothing he could do about it.

I suspect that the miserable woman who served me in the first place either pocketed that £25 or just put through the wrong amount to spite me. Or maybe she was just plain stupid which appears to be the main qualification to work for a bank.

I got my revenge. I opened an account with another bank and transfered all of my money to the nearest pound to it leaving 44p in the Scabby Rationale account. Fourteen years later, it's still there, 44p, never a penny less or a penny more. I receive debit cards, statements, all the other bumph that banks send out. I have notified them of my new address each time I've moved. They've contacted me several times asking if I want to close the account, each time I tell them no. Reckon I must have cost them a good deal more than £25 in expenses by now. I will keep the account open until the day I die. DO NOT FUCK WITH ME!

Am I being petty?
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:07, 9 replies)

you could also
every month, write yourself cheques for 3p to your other account and when you get close to a zero balance, deposit a pound and start again...
( scoshi pretending to diet since, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:24, closed)

That would be wicked
As would writing 50 cheques for 1p every month so they had to send me a new chequebook. Wonder how far it would be possible to push them?
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 14:24, closed)

How delightfully evil, in a sort of dandruff-in-the-vicar's-tea way
That's a rather nice, slow-burning revenge you've had. Well done and have a click.
( Scrumper, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:26, closed)

Warning
"Can't you use the cashpoint" she said

At this point the alarm bells should have rung loud and clear....

"Can't you use a plastic surgeon" would have been appropriate I feel, then try again at another window / bank / day.
(amsterdam_neild, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 12:31, closed)

I feel a better response to that question would be
"Why? Are you not qualified to do this?"
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 20 Jul 2009, 13:09, closed)

Yes
Please continue.

Don't consider stopping until you have had over 25 quid's worth of enjoyment out of it.
(teebie jeebie, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 13:15, closed)

Already have
I laugh like a mong every time I get a letter from them.

"Ooh me statement's arrived, wonder how much is in my account, pffft" :)
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 14:22, closed)

Well done!
Now it's time to take it to the next level....

You've banked with them for 15 years or so, time to request an account review I reckon! Waste an hour of their time to discuss account options for a long term customer :-)
(golddust QOTW now revolves around being a cunt, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 16:44, closed)

You should book an appointment...
And see if they'll let you open a savings account for your accumulated wealth. If you take up at least an hour, that is your £25, when your 44p may even make some interest...
(The Kwyjibo A big, dumb, balding North American ape., Tue 21 Jul 2009, 14:34, closed)