Barred
I was once barred from every single bar and club in Lincoln in one night.

Basically, after some taxing Uni exams, at 11 oclock in the morning, we decided to engage in that age old student pastime that is known as the 'all-dayer'

We set off into town and discovered a bar that sold £1.60 pints of Carling all day, every day. So in there we sat, eventually playing drinking games with pitchers of cocktails (never a good idea)

I eventually around 6 oclock I had to return to my flat to fetch my passport (I don't drive, so it's my only form of ID) and I walked back with my mate, who ran into his missus (who promptly put him to bed as he was fucking ruined by this time). I decided to visit my then girlfriend, who instead of sobering me up, made me a nice, strong vodka and coke..

We journeyed back to town, and met up with the rest of the lads who'd continued drinking. The evening went downhill in terms of conduct from there, with pints being spilled etc.

I then spied two rather fetching looking small trees in the window of the bar in which we were sitting... and decided to rip all the branches and leaves off them and stick them in my front and back pockets. We then decided to go to a club, being as we were heroically drunk..

.. as we were leaving the bouncers stopped me for obvious reasons, and I decided it'd be a great idea to go "I'm terribly sorry..." and throw all the branches/leaves at the pair of bouncers.. and run off down the road, swifty followed by the rest of my group

We later tried to get into a club but the bouncer there kindly told us "You won't get in anywhere for a while, you got caught on CCTV causing descruction of property, all the bouncers in this town have orders not to let you in"


I got in the week after, fuck knows how..

And yes, I know I'm a twat for doing it.. seemed like a great idea at the time.
(comrade^, Thu 31 Aug 2006, 13:45, Reply)