Young Guns
As a child I was mildly* obsessed with guns, particularly cow boys and gun slingers. Unfortunately being at such a tender age the most violent films I would be allowed to watch at home centred around a rather camp man in a black mask and a side kick called Toto. Fortunately one of my best friends had parents with a rather more liberal stance on films, consiquently I learnt a vast vocabulary of words that would put a drunk pirate to shame.

My best friends dad was (and still is) a complete legend. Fortunately he is/was one of those people who were infinitely cool with out being a show off or being one of those poor buggers who desperately attempt to be "down with the kids". As a result he was always one of the gang and not really treated as an adult... this combination of "daddy cool" and violent films lead to me being banned from my friends house (by my own parents).

One week me and my friend watched young guns,( at the time) a perfect blend of foul language and graphic violence. By the end of it we were engaged in a sugar fueled gun battle only comparable to buch casidy and the sundance kid. My friends father was attempting to work in his office but struggling due to two brats doing there best to kill each other all over the rest of his house. after chasing us around the house we were cornered and I uttered the imortal lines (of Amelio Estivez) "are you my mommy? no. are you my daddy? no. are you are motherf*cking, c8ck sucking son of a B!tch? yes!" I think this really had pushed things a little far, as he was too shocked to say or do anything as we ran away giggling.

My parents of course were pretty furious when they were found out, though by this stage my friends dad just thought it was hilarious and was laughing incontrolably as he related the story. I was then banned from said friends house until I promised to stop watching "naughty films"**, of course I promised and of course we carried on watching them. I just learnt an important lesson; its not a good idea to swear at any ones parents regardless of how cool they are. Fortunately were still best friends and his dad is still a legend but has never let me live it down. the shame.

length, girth? what does it matter I'm a b3ta virgin so I dont know what I'm doing anyway.

*POP*

*read manically
** is it me or does that sound a tad seedy?
(serial lurker, Sat 2 Sep 2006, 14:15, Reply)