Ask a silly question...
A bit mild compared to most other entries here, but I am now barred from a pub even though I wasn't even present when the barring was done. My ex-girlfriend was out with her brother and his girlfriend, who has just qualified as a barrister. Very soon after being served last orders, the owner of the establishment starts asking them to drink up and go. Said junior counsel informs owner that it is against such-and-such a statute not to allow 30 mins 'drinking-up time' after last orders have been served. He mutters some dismissive comment. That is where it would have ended had she not then, Alan Partridge-like, produced a large (metaphorical) plate from the folds of her invisible legal robes, and handed it to the owner, with the question 'what are you going to do, bar us?' To which he of course replied 'Yes, actually, I am.' He seems confident that in this situation, no explanation is required in law.
A few nights later I reluctantly accompany ex-girlfriend on a return visit to see if the bar also applies to her. I order 2 pints from a barmaid not present on the night in question, only for yet another staff member to inform us that yes, in fact, she is banned and so am I, despite not even being there on the night!
She says the owner's always held a grudge against her...
(Sheridan Whiteside, Mon 4 Sep 2006, 15:30, Reply)